Too embarrassed to get them from a store?

By Anonymous - 14/07/2020 02:00

Today, I was told by Amazon that a belt I had ordered was arriving. I grabbed an Amazon package out of the mailbox without even checking who the package was addressed to. I now have an awkward apology ahead of me for opening my stepbrother's box of condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 619

You deserved it 1 662

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By TMI - 05/08/2009 19:36 - United States

Today, I was opening and sorting mail for my boss as part of my job. One package was delivered to the office instead of his home by mistake, since his house is next door on the same property. I didn't notice until I had opened it. I had to hand my boss an opened box of toys. Kinky ones. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 632

You deserved it 6 386

It's a sign...

By Ohfknhell - 16/05/2018 05:00

Today, I received a package from Amazon that was supposed to contain the book I needed for my open book final exam tonight. They must have mixed up my order, because the box contained a large pink dildo. I think the universe just told me to get fucked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 658

You deserved it 756

By Anonymous - 09/08/2018 15:00

Today, UPS delivered my kinky sex toys to my ex-husband. Apparently the delivery went wrong so they sent it to the last known address. He called to say he got my "package" and I had to go pick it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 203

You deserved it 628

My package

By Nikki - 20/11/2019 05:00

Today, I finally received the vibrator I ordered online. Too bad they labeled what the item was on the outside of the box, and my dad was the one to pick up the packages. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 511

You deserved it 714

By totallyembarassed - 07/07/2012 04:08 - United States - Charlotte

Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 993

You deserved it 28 755

By mediocreboobs - 18/02/2009 22:31 - United States

Today, I was home alone tanning in my backyard which is fairly secluded. I took my top off and laid there for awhile before I looked over and saw the UPS guy standing at my gate with a package because nobody answered the door. I looked horrified and he said not to worry, he'd seen better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 444

You deserved it 8 848

Memory loss

By UGH - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had to return a shirt to Target. My mom offered to do it for me on her way to work, so I gave her the shirt and receipt. Later, I remembered that on the same receipt I had purchased condoms, lube, and whipped cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 274

You deserved it 81 061

By Anonymous - 15/06/2014 18:01 - United States - Corona

Today, my brother got pantsed by his idiot friends. It was a surprise to everyone that he was wearing women's underwear at the time, but even more of a surprise for me that the underwear belonged to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 013

You deserved it 4 680

By bob - 07/02/2011 06:52 - Canada

Today, I found out that FedEx delivered my $700 package to the wrong person. The person who signed for it didn't even spell my name right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 412

You deserved it 2 610

By sleekRelease - 11/06/2019 04:00

Today, I was expecting an important delivery for a party I'm having tonight. I was in the shower when the doorbell rang. In my haste, I slipped and ended up with a bunch of little cuts and bruises. Turns out, it was someone trying to leave a note saying it would be delivered tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 730

You deserved it 181

BurnInDemonFire 33

Tuesday 14 July 2020 3:28

So what you're saying is... his package came before yours.

juggalo2 20

Tuesday 14 July 2020 2:04

Dear Penthouse forums...

Comments

juggalo2 20

Tuesday 14 July 2020 2:04

Dear Penthouse forums...

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 14 July 2020 3:17

Don't apologize. Don't even mention it to him. Tie a bunch of the condoms together end to end and you'll have a stretchy belt that will be cooler and more useful than the crap you bought.

BurnInDemonFire 33

Tuesday 14 July 2020 3:28

So what you're saying is... his package came before yours.

Mooglefox 23

Tuesday 14 July 2020 17:12

Why in the hell do you need to order condoms on Amazon? Faster for you to just go to the store.

sarsuela 28

Tuesday 14 July 2020 17:21

Pills are not for everyone and I have not seen multipacks in stores so ordering a pack of 50 condoms once is more convinient than going to the store 17 times.