Miscellaneous: Today, while eating a Subway sandwich, I was watching a comedian...

By zombielover1 - 13/07/2009 06:17 - United States

Today, while eating a Subway sandwich, I was watching a comedian on TV. As he said his signature line, I laughed hysterically and accidentally snorted a jalapeño into my nose. I spent the next 5 minutes trying to snort out the little piece that got lodged into my nostril. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 167

You deserved it 12 829

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By yankesik - 03/01/2016 22:42 - Poland - Kalisz

Today, I sneezed hard while eating some quite spicy potato chips at my friend's house. Some of the chips passed to the nasal cavity, and I ended up having to pick my nose for some pointy, spicy chips shrapnel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 285

You deserved it 1 826

By Anonymous - 28/03/2012 16:25 - United States - Fort Worth

Today, one of my nostrils became completely blocked. At lunch time, I went out to my car to dig into my nose. When I finished, I held up the cornflake sized booger in victory. I noticed too late that my boss was in a car adjacent to me, shooting me a horrified look. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 096

You deserved it 30 122

By Snuffles - 24/04/2019 18:00

Today, while eating a BLT sandwich, I unexpectedly sneezed a lump of bacon up the back of my nose. It has just taken 6 hours of unpleasantness to snort the lump back out. Not how I wanted to spend my day off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 955

You deserved it 234

By BurnBabyBurn - 22/02/2017 10:00 - United States - Roberta

Today, after stopping to pick up dinner at a fast food joint, I got a nosebleed. I immediately reached into the bag to grab napkins and began stuffing them up my nose, only to find out too late that a mustard packet had burst in the bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 687

You deserved it 621

By DeepTaccer - 30/10/2010 21:28 - United Kingdom

Today, I was sucking on a Tic Tac. Just as I was starting to get into it, the Tic Tac suddenly shot down my throat. After a minute of coughing and gagging, it came back up… out my left nostril. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 102

You deserved it 6 286

By M2thaM - 29/05/2009 05:23 - United States

Today, I was trying to flirt with the guy I like using body language, so I leaned over this counter in a sensual way. I happened to have a fork, so I went to bite the tip that sexy way people do in movies. I accidentally stabbed myself in the lip, cutting it. My lunch had jalapeños in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 600

You deserved it 56 760

What am I doing?

By janesays - 24/02/2010 07:45 - United States

Today, my 2 year-old had a large booger blocking his nose so I pulled it out. I was on the phone and absentmindedly rolling it around between my thumb and pointer finger. I put it in my mouth and crushed it between my teeth for a solid minute before I remembered what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 592

You deserved it 66 547

Clogged

By ISmellBread - 15/12/2023 05:00 - United States - Cabot

Today, I was quickly eating lunch during a work meeting. I ended up inhaling some of my sandwich so I've had toast stuck in my sinuses for the last hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 301

You deserved it 245

By Username - 09/05/2011 17:23 - China

Today, I made a cup of tea at work. Whilst talking to a work mate I took a sip of the tea which I had forgotten was boiling hot and laughed at the same time, causing it to come out of my nose. I have blistered my whole mouth and even burnt my nostrils. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 227

You deserved it 10 548

By negativesoup - 10/11/2016 18:44

Today, I was eating chicken noodle soup for my lunch. It was perfect until the last bite when it went down the wrong pipe. Choking, I coughed up what I'd already eaten. In front of my coworkers, and all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 287

You deserved it 784

Fredzter 0

Monday 13 July 2009 16:08

HAHAHAHAHA!! That is brilliant!! xD

Vasir 2

Monday 13 July 2009 16:21

This one time i accidently did that to a macoroni and cheese noodle. i sneezed out the noodle. It still had cheese..

Comments

nativebacon 0

Monday 13 July 2009 16:08

Man, that sucks

eaglesfan761 0

Sunday 26 July 2009 22:06

For sure. And it was a jalapeno, so you know that had to burn like hell.

cstevanus 4

Saturday 11 September 2010 18:28

that happened to me once with cheesecake. unbelievibly uncomfortable. then i started sneezing alot which didnt help.

Fredzter 0

Monday 13 July 2009 16:08

HAHAHAHAHA!! That is brilliant!! xD

Inked2009 0

Monday 13 July 2009 16:13

Haha lesson learned! Never eat any form of spicy food when you are watching something funny.

Zero2Sixty 0

Monday 13 July 2009 16:16

been there done that :)

cucuto89 0

Monday 13 July 2009 16:17

Cool Story BRo;

xDropsOfJupiterx 8

Wednesday 4 July 2012 8:57

Someone should punch you in the face.

Vasir 2

Monday 13 July 2009 16:21

This one time i accidently did that to a macoroni and cheese noodle. i sneezed out the noodle. It still had cheese..

AndelleRae 9

Tuesday 14 July 2009 11:47

Lmfao. 6, I had the same thing happen, only mine was from a Rugrats themed box of mac & cheese. I totally sneezed Chucky out. Awesome times, right?

Imthedaddy11 16

Wednesday 10 February 2016 4:49

I read that as I still smell cheese

CodeMan16 0

Monday 13 July 2009 16:23

you might be a redneck if...

kekeshayeshaye 4

Thursday 16 September 2010 5:47

nicee

iKaite 0

Monday 13 July 2009 16:27

I moderated this one and I lol'd epically.

eli_guerra 0

Monday 13 July 2009 16:31

Lol that musta burned too!!

GabriLee 0

Monday 13 July 2009 16:38

Ow. I feel like I cannot fully comprehend the level of FML that this contains. It sucks getting anything up your nose, I can't imagine a jalapeno... F your life indeed.