Miscellaneous: Today, the neighbors called the cops because they heard "gun...

By We're still popping them - 27/02/2015 00:35 - United States - Fremont

Today, the neighbors called the cops because they heard "gun shots". My girlfriend and I were popping bubble wrap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 659

You deserved it 2 879

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Same thing different taste

Spooked

By Anonymous - 18/03/2021 08:01

Today, I found out that the loud "firecrackers" I heard the night before were actually shotgun blasts by my neighbor murdering his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 653

You deserved it 70

By avocadotoe - 14/11/2016 06:52 - United States - Big Bear Lake

Today, my boyfriend and I were house sitting. We were a little on edge because we'd heard noises. We were starting to get intimate, and suddenly the house alarm started going off. We locked ourselves in the room, called the police, and they told us that we were the ones who'd set it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 195

You deserved it 3 103

Jumpy

By Chelsea - 21/04/2009 05:20 - United States

Today, my mom made me clean. I was dusting in the living room and heard gunshots outside the apartment. I dove on the floor and started crying and screaming. My mom walked in and informed me that the sound was her making popcorn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 689

You deserved it 71 082

By Jerf - 24/06/2009 00:56 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on, and listening to loud music when she suddenly looked worried and asked if I heard something. I said no and continued. Moments later, three firemen opened the bedroom door and told us to get dressed and go outside because the building was on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 905

You deserved it 9 805

Private freakout

By emmy - 03/06/2022 00:00

Today, the neighbors called the cops on us because they heard a series of loud screams. No, no one was being murdered, but my mom found one of my socks in the laundry room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 852

You deserved it 159

By AussieG75 - 21/07/2012 04:48 - United States - Saint Augustine

Today, I heard screaming coming from my neighbor's house. Since her husband has a history of abusing her, I called the cops. After they left with him in custody, she called to yell at me because they were "working things out" after "having a few drinks". FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 376

You deserved it 2 545

Nice neighborhood

By Anonymous - 11/10/2015 15:34 - United States - Lexington

Today, I awoke to the sound of my neighbors attacking my car with a baseball bat accusing me of calling the cops on them. I did call the cops on them, after they screamed at me last night, drunkenly, to call the cops for them because they thought they were being robbed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 966

You deserved it 1 789

By CAchickadee - 29/05/2011 04:27 - United States

Today, I was singing while unloading my dishwasher. I heard a knock on the door and went to answer it only to find the police telling me they received noise complaints from my neighbors. I live next-door to my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 298

You deserved it 6 224

By erianne - 07/05/2018 15:00

Today, the neighbors heard a blood curdling scream and called the cops, thinking I was being murdered. Nope. I just stubbed my toe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 872

You deserved it 590

By fuck you, jack - 04/03/2014 20:44 - United States - Peabody

Today, I got home late from work, so I decided to make myself a microwave meal. I pierced the plastic film several times. A little too loudly for my hateful bastard of a neighbor, I guess, because he called the cops on me, claiming he heard gunshots from my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 245

You deserved it 3 297

MeowMcMeowenson 19

Friday 27 February 2015 11:25

You know it's pretty unusual to shoot bubble wrap

brandoneyez1 25

Friday 27 February 2015 11:34

Your neighbor is an idiot. A gunshot is way louder.

Comments

krisseyDJ 20

Friday 27 February 2015 18:32

Relationship goals

HeWillBeLoved105 22

Friday 27 February 2015 19:43

You have some weird neighbors.

pablo8 8

Friday 27 February 2015 19:58

How loud is your ******* bubble wrap

nialls_girl 13

Friday 27 February 2015 20:10

They're obviously not gun people. There is a big difference between the sound that bubble wrap makes and the sound of gun fire...

benjamn 24

Friday 27 February 2015 21:07

Did you invite the cops in for some bubble popping?

youresoscrewed 24

Friday 27 February 2015 21:37

Oh, is that how it's called these days?

MetalSonicCD 13

Friday 27 February 2015 21:46

Spend my nights with a roll of bubble wrap, pop pop hope no one sees me, getting freaky.

Rammer3500 23

Friday 27 February 2015 22:01

Girlfriend and bubble wrap? You have a great life

Sathane 21

Friday 27 February 2015 22:11

Loudest bubble wrap ever!

False_Stupidity 41

Friday 27 February 2015 22:53

You can get bubble wrap with very large bubbles, it can be quite loud if you jump on it.

ally8 21

Saturday 28 February 2015 0:01

Everyone loves bubble wrap!!!!

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The Top

Today, I was ready to get intimate with my husband 7 months after giving birth to our son. He always made excuses as to why he couldn’t. Our marriage was on the rocks because of this, so when I sat him down to talk he admitted that to save this marriage I need to get a “tummy tuck” and a “breast lift.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 056

You deserved it 233

Today, I found out why I’ve been covering most of the bills and the rent. Turns out my boyfriend is paying a very expensive OnlyFans subscription for his female bestie. When I confronted him about it, he responded by yelling, “It’s not like that!” and punched our glass patio door, shattering it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 576

You deserved it 241

The Top

Today, I found out my dad has been sending dirty text messages to my mom. Which wouldn't be a problem except they're divorced and my dad is remarried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 998

You deserved it 2 875

Today, my long-distance boyfriend and I decided to be a bit naughty on Skype. It was 3am so we assumed that my dad was asleep and did some dirty talk. When we were done, I heard my dad laughing outside my room; he'd heard it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 510

You deserved it 17 427

Today, our computer system has irretrievably broken down due to viruses. My boss is the one who refused to get new antivirus software, but he’s still blaming me because I’m the computer guy and should be able to protect us from stupidly complicated viruses, "like the hackers in the movies." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 658

You deserved it 234

Today, I'm getting a medical scan, so I had to drink a barium shake for breakfast. It was so disgusting that I puked it back up. Now I have to drink another one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 276

You deserved it 1 289

Today, my neighbour decided to get high while leaving his bathtub running, resulting in passing out and starting a flood in the hallways. FML

I agree, your life sucks 948

You deserved it 59

Today, my new girlfriend was telling me how she's attracted to "All-American" looking guys. Tall, manly body, handsome face. Then she says, "But it's ok, you're cute too." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 063

You deserved it 3 222