Kids: Today, my son thought it was a good idea to spray deodorant into...

By Ramis182 - 03/10/2011 04:26 - United States

Today, my son thought it was a good idea to spray deodorant into his mouth because he wanted fresh breath. This resulted in him passing out. My son is 17. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 748

You deserved it 6 011

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

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Same thing different taste

By afather - 14/06/2015 13:41 - United States - Worthing

Today, I had to take my son to the hospital for drinking sunscreen. Apparently, he saw something on the internet that said if he drank it, his body would sweat it out and continually apply it to his body. He's 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 390

You deserved it 6 525

By bellabreeze - 09/08/2012 03:29 - United States - Lebanon

Today, my son thought it would be a great idea to spray a whole can of spray tan all over my freshly-painted white bathroom walls as an "experiment". He's 18. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 129

You deserved it 3 354

By Anonymous - 15/09/2013 04:02 - United States

Today, my teenage son tried to huff a can of spray paint. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 496

You deserved it 6 567

By Stigmamma - 12/05/2019 04:00

Today, my 12-year-old son and 13-year-old daughter sprayed themselves with a ton of deodorant and perfume respectively. The two clouds of spray have combined into a noxious gas that slowly traveled through the house, giving everybody an instant, massive headache. Everybody, except my son and daughter. They think they smell great. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 973

You deserved it 252

By Anonymous - 06/08/2009 06:13 - Australia

Today, I had to call poison control because my idiot son swallowed a bunch of baking soda to "make a volcano in his tummy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 389

You deserved it 17 295

By don'tdrinkthat - 03/11/2013 22:27 - United States - Quincy

Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 252

You deserved it 4 818

By Failed Parent - 11/10/2012 06:59 - United States

Today, as I was about to leave for work, my 16-year-old son stumbled home in nothing but his underwear and pink cowboy boots. He threw his hands in the air, yelled, "BOTTLE SIP BOTTLE GUZZLE," promptly threw up and passed out in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 926

You deserved it 4 635

By Anonymous - 13/10/2014 00:38 - United States - Racine

Today, my son drank a bottle of hot sauce. It wasn't a dare, he actually thought that it would give him a fever so that he could skip school tomorrow. This idiot is 15 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 009

You deserved it 5 172

By richkief76 - 10/05/2011 02:34

Today, I finally found where the awful lingering stench in my house was coming from. My son thought it would be funny to piss in the baby's humidifier. He's 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 975

You deserved it 8 324

By eenkoekje - 13/05/2011 07:20

Today, I was called by my son's school to pick him up. Apparently, he snorted baking soda, crushed aspirin, and flour because he thought it was coke. Where did I go wrong raising this twerp? FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 319

You deserved it 15 913

Wreckless_fml 6

Monday 3 October 2011 12:01

Sounds like a winner to me.

saIty 17

Monday 3 October 2011 12:10

He probably saw the axe commercial. He wants the chicks all over his mouth.

Comments

ShadowBitch99 2

Wednesday 5 October 2011 0:03

Hahahaha, dumbass.

wobeert 7

Wednesday 5 October 2011 1:59

You guys are missing the point! he was getting high off of axe and then passed out. He fooled you guys.

djeq2006 0

Wednesday 5 October 2011 2:25

It even says on the can "DO NOT SWALLOW" LOL

shaunM 6

Wednesday 5 October 2011 5:35

you do realise your son could have died as a result of his stupid idea and didnt stop him from doing it in the first place

only1starr 0

Wednesday 5 October 2011 7:15

my brother sprayed it in my mouth and nothing happened to me..

Maximus22 0

Wednesday 5 October 2011 7:16

Sorry, but you raised a dumbass.

Seadizzle 0

Wednesday 5 October 2011 8:04

You can get high from inhaling that stuff, maybe that was his intent.

Mr25_fml 14

Wednesday 5 October 2011 14:30

sounds like a Harvard-bound student to me!

jsturaveragegirl 5

Wednesday 5 October 2011 21:59

Not the sharpest tool in the shed now is he?

cootch 0

Wednesday 5 October 2011 23:47

you sir have raised the next Einstein u must be proud

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It's great to see you ! How was july ? Hot, sweaty, flirty ? How I miseed talking to you (and getting one or two comments if we're lucky enough). But let's not complain, a whole month welcoming artists for their second rounds who gave us brand new il...

I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 10

Today, according to my husband, if I die first he won’t be looking after my son from a previous marriage. Either my sister will have to take him or he’ll go into foster care. He doesn’t want kids of his own, so he’ll be dammed if he has to look after someone else’s just because I’m dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 506

You deserved it 946

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Today, I tried to open the research paper I've been working on for the past month, only to discover that the entire file is permanently lost and can't be recovered. This is not the first time this has happened to this paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 052

You deserved it 15 942

Today, I was walking outside when I saw my best friend about 100 meters away. I began running towards her, arms flailing, screaming out a tribal battle cry. It wasn't until I was nearly on top of her that I realised it was someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 517

You deserved it 37 194

Today, I committed to babysitting on Valentine's Day not because I needed the money, but because I just got dumped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 030

You deserved it 2 789

Today, after assuring my best friend that his girlfriend would never cheat on him, I came home to my brother having loud sex with my best friend's girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 711

You deserved it 2 635

Today, I am a Frenchie who's been in England for two months. While wanting to say to my technician that my manager made me groan during our meeting, I said that he made me moan. Now he keeps looking at me with a grin on his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 014

You deserved it 4 026

Today, my husband angrily accused me of cheating on him. It turns out he thinks that because I've been spending time with my brother recently, the two of us must be having some kind of incestuous affair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 171

You deserved it 4 235

Same thing different taste

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