Kids: Today, my son invited me to his first standup comedy gig. I accepted,...

By Anonymous - 13/04/2015 15:23 - United Kingdom - Manchester

Today, my son invited me to his first standup comedy gig. I accepted, only to later suffer through an hour of the worst jokes I've heard in my entire life. It was so bad, he made Dane Cook look like a comic genius, and I had to resist heckling him. Hours later, I still feel vaguely suicidal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 924

You deserved it 6 037

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Same thing different taste

Too challenging for you? That's my job! I'm an edgy comedian!

By Anonymous - 08/02/2023 00:00

Today, I was feeling down so my husband took me to a comedy show. This comedian saw me, heckled me for a full two minutes, then returned to me a further three times during his act to mock me again, zeroing in on every one of my insecurities until I left crying, feeling worse than ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 616

You deserved it 161

By Anonymous - 19/01/2013 00:26 - Iceland

Today, at an open mic comedy club, my jokes went down so poorly that someone decided to hurl a chair at me on-stage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 433

You deserved it 15 596

By DeeDee - 04/02/2014 22:08 - Austria - Vienna

Today, my brother came to my first standup comedy act. He'd apparently read my material beforehand, and kept finishing my jokes for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 735

You deserved it 5 440

By Anonymous - 21/01/2015 05:34

Today, I did my first night of open-mic standup. The first 5 minutes went badly, but I don't know if it got any better afterwards, because a drunk audience member climbed up on stage and knocked me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 333

You deserved it 3 982

By holywowz - 17/05/2017 18:00

Today, I went to a comedy show, expecting to feel better about a difficult relationship. Instead, I saw a performance written by the girl who loves my husband, about my husband, and how she loves him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 162

You deserved it 363

By Sarri - 18/02/2014 02:13 - United States - Pembroke

Today, I worked up the courage to sing at an open mic night. I lost my cool halfway through because all I could hear was laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 406

You deserved it 5 407

Haha, fat people, haha

By We are horrible people - 02/01/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, I decided to put my friend through the ultimate test of maturity: watching an episode of My 600-lb Life. He didn't even go ten minutes before he started making jokes. I didn't go much longer before I started laughing at them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 104

You deserved it 775

By ohhhjaymo13 - 05/02/2011 05:58 - United States

Today, at work, I was told I was a failure. Feeling like crap, I went to my best friend to see if he could make me laugh. He told me that he felt obligated to hang out with me, so he thought that we shouldn't anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 677

You deserved it 3 372

By Yeppets - 27/07/2014 18:44 - United States

Today, I went to a comedy show with my mom, and they asked the audience members to yell out their problems as ideas for an improv skit. My mom yelled, "My daughter can't get a boyfriend!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 146

You deserved it 4 845

Hack

By Anonymous - 31/03/2022 00:00 - United States - Morganville

Today, my friends and I were feeling nostalgic and decided to listen to some of Dane Cook's old stuff. We got to "The Friend Nobody Likes" and I commented that I'm glad we don't have a person like that in our group. This was followed by a very awkward silence, and someone suggesting we listen to something else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 148

You deserved it 218

MxAxRxCxO 30

Tuesday 14 April 2015 0:06

Imagine his confidence when he stumbles across this FML

iSativa 24

Tuesday 14 April 2015 0:05

You should be supportive of your son no matter how bad his actions are. Confidence is key.

Comments

Eloxia 7

Tuesday 14 April 2015 0:19

Maybe he isn't bad, maybe it just isn't the type of humor that is for you. How did the audience react? Was there laughter or silence or booing. Not everyone has the same tastes. You can be supportive even if his comedy isn't your taste. If the audience also didn't like him, you can maybe offer to get him improve classes or something to help him learn new techniques.

vlalam 24

Tuesday 14 April 2015 0:21

I wonder who reproduced him.. oh wait, it was ur seed and last time I heard, karma gets u.. haha jk.. i wish rather u supported him and helped him in a constructive way.. one needs guts to do a stand up comedy and u definitely cant

laden_swallow09 34

Tuesday 14 April 2015 14:40

That was painful to read.

buckdharma 36

Tuesday 14 April 2015 0:24

Wait, he had a whole hour of material? Maybe you could write some jokes for him. You know, support his life, versus life support.

Mermaidhead 13

Tuesday 14 April 2015 0:29

perhaps instead you should have your son try his hand at karate, the Dane Cook of martial arts. ps. your son can't be THAT bad if he got an hour long gig. it doesn't sound like it was a 15 minute open mic type deal. clearly there's some people find him funny if there's any solace in that.

laurencarroll 11

Tuesday 14 April 2015 0:32

How about we don't joke about suicide?

ScottLucky 18

Tuesday 14 April 2015 12:42

Most intelligent comment I've read in ages!

soulreaper12296 28

Tuesday 14 April 2015 0:32

Umm, Dane Cook IS funny!

soulcrusher11 16

Tuesday 14 April 2015 6:05

soulcrusher11.

glassofwhiskey_fml 7

Tuesday 14 April 2015 0:34

Dane Cook is funny, don't hate

soulcrusher11 16

Tuesday 14 April 2015 6:06

hilarious guy that dc

ChristinePi 36

Tuesday 14 April 2015 0:45

This was a funny FML until you said his jokes wanted to make you commit suicide. Not cool, suicide is nothing joke about or talk about so lightly.

the_aspect 28

Tuesday 14 April 2015 18:10

I must agree with you about the suicide part. Suicide is not a funny joke nor something to take very lightly at all. There are alot of people left and right who literally take the way out by hurting them or another person.