Miscellaneous: Today, my obsession with replying "Your Mom" reached a new level... - FML

By Motha - 09/04/2014 05:17 - United States - West Jordan

Today, my obsession with replying "Your Mom" reached a new level when my anatomy teacher asked what I'd done with my pencil. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 604

You deserved it 50 470

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/03/2016 04:31 - United States - Havertown

Today, my dad had fun embarrassing me as much as possible in my parent-teacher conference by moaning whenever the teacher talked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 476

You deserved it 1 511

Sins of the Mother

By speedster - 24/06/2021 06:01 - United States

Today, I asked my science teacher if he'd had my mom when she went to my high school. He took one look at me, glared, and said, "Oh yeah, I remember HER." I have that class every day the rest of the year. Thanks a lot, Mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 844

You deserved it 289

By NittanyMangini - 26/05/2016 16:37 - United States

Today, I was taking a biology final and was just randomly tapping my pencil. My teacher thought I was somehow communicating with the person next to me, and decided to fail me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 285

You deserved it 1 519

By Anonymous - 12/12/2009 00:45 - United States

Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 420

You deserved it 39 983

Huge balls

By Anonymous - 10/10/2021 19:04 - United States

Today, I had to pick up my son from school because he was constantly talking about his "Giant pen." In mid-July, I got him a giant-sized pen (writing utensil) and he liked it very much. Apparently, one of the teachers had their mind in the gutter and thought he was talking about… you know what. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 289

You deserved it 82

By sciencenat - 14/01/2016 06:36 - France - V?lizy-villacoublay

Today, as a natural science teacher, I was drawing a uterus on the class chalkboard. One of my students started messing around and being noisy, so I shouted, "Be quiet and check out my uterus!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 898

You deserved it 5 109

By Anonymous - 30/11/2009 02:39 - United States

Today, my mom sat on a pencil and started bleeding. She then made me clean the wound on her butt and put ointment on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 127

You deserved it 4 927

By Anonymous - 09/08/2009 00:02 - United States

Today, my mom went snooping through my art bin to "clean out my old drawings". She found numerous nude pieces and accused me of selling porn. My mom mistook and threw out 57 anatomy practice sketches that I worked very very hard on, and ripped up the remainder of my drawings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 069

You deserved it 3 540

By f_n_fail - 06/12/2016 21:31 - United States

Today, I got a note from my son's kindergarten teacher. During free time yesterday, he told her, "Mommy was stripping". I was indeed stripping. Paint that is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 181

You deserved it 721

By idkmybffjill? - 13/02/2009 04:12 - United States

Today, I was pestering a co-worker, so she jokingly stated "I'll bury you!" and I replied "I'll bury your mom!". Her moms funeral was last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 570

You deserved it 49 035

Next

Top comments

Lebeaugars95 20

Wednesday 9 April 2014 15:31

guess who the teacher called after that comment

SpunkyyyMonkeyy 10

Wednesday 9 April 2014 15:14

All you had to do was go to class with a pencil. I am sure McDonalds is hiring though.

Comments

yourwifelovesme 25

Wednesday 9 April 2014 22:38

With your maturity level, no wonder yours is pencil sized. YDI 100%

blahblah5743794 19

Wednesday 9 April 2014 22:59

GFY

Skyzeri 20

Wednesday 9 April 2014 23:31

I didn't even know that people used that phrase anymore.

LatvianPride 16

Thursday 10 April 2014 0:09

YDI, grow up.

peak4u 10

Thursday 10 April 2014 0:11

It's 2014, sincerely worried seeing the yo mama phase was over a good 10 years ago

mcmacmick97 9

Thursday 10 April 2014 0:18

Some people don't have a mom anymore. My mom died when I was 11 and it really hurts when someone says your mom or plays the yo mama card. I hope your teacher got you suspended and you feel like a real ******* asshole.

DatWeirdoDoe 9

Thursday 10 April 2014 0:47

Wow i bet that teacher called someones mom

nokturn_fml 11

Thursday 10 April 2014 0:55

Dude that's awesome, sadly there is a time and place for those jokes...

davincidasecond 24

Thursday 10 April 2014 2:59

You know who else's obsession with saying "your mom" reached a new level ... ?

Blackhawk706 23

Thursday 10 April 2014 3:18

The first time I read this I saw penis, much more entertaining that way

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The Top

Today, there's a stray black cat in my apartment complex. It had badly bitten me two months ago and I had to get several injections. Today the same cat barged into my flat when I opened the door to receive a delivery, and it attacked my cat. I barely managed to fight and push him out of my flat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 399

You deserved it 72

Today, my boss made me run yet another stupid errand. When I delivered the paperwork to his office, I saw an email printout on his desk. Apparently, he has a plan in the works to get me "fried" next month. I'm not sure whether to give him a letter of resignation or a bottle of barbecue sauce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 359

You deserved it 2 739

The Top

Today, I couldn't get into my car. In an attempt to get in, I broke a window. As I climbed in, the actual owner of the car walked up. Mine was across the street. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 431

You deserved it 46 300

Today, my girlfriend came over, drank half a bottle of Jack Daniels and pissed in my sink. I broke up with her and went out with friends. I met a woman and brought her home to watch a movie. She drank a bottle of wine and puked on my couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 411

You deserved it 3 792

Today, I found out I need surgery, and the state medicaid insurance denied me full coverage for it, since my income is "over the limit". I make 35,000 a year and live in one of the most expensive states. FML

I agree, your life sucks 454

You deserved it 99

Today, I had to bail my drunk dad out of jail after he beat the shit out of a mime artist. All he had to say on the matter was "Fucking bastard was playing mind games." and that he'd beat him up again if he could. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 653

You deserved it 2 457

Today, I was talking to a guy I've recently started developing feelings for. We've been talking for a while, but he revealed that he wasn't being serious with anything we've been talking about, and didn't have any feelings for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 758

You deserved it 123

Today, it's April Fool's day. I had to take a CPR class, and everything was going well. We took a break and I went to get a drink of water and started choking. They thought I was making fun of the class, and made me leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 201

You deserved it 2 472