Miscellaneous: Today, my obsession with replying "Your Mom" reached a new level...

By Motha - 09/04/2014 05:17 - United States - West Jordan

Today, my obsession with replying "Your Mom" reached a new level when my anatomy teacher asked what I'd done with my pencil. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 604

You deserved it 50 470

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/03/2016 04:31 - United States - Havertown

Today, my dad had fun embarrassing me as much as possible in my parent-teacher conference by moaning whenever the teacher talked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 476

You deserved it 1 511

Sins of the Mother

By speedster - 24/06/2021 06:01 - United States

Today, I asked my science teacher if he'd had my mom when she went to my high school. He took one look at me, glared, and said, "Oh yeah, I remember HER." I have that class every day the rest of the year. Thanks a lot, Mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 844

You deserved it 289

By NittanyMangini - 26/05/2016 16:37 - United States

Today, I was taking a biology final and was just randomly tapping my pencil. My teacher thought I was somehow communicating with the person next to me, and decided to fail me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 285

You deserved it 1 519

By Anonymous - 12/12/2009 00:45 - United States

Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 420

You deserved it 39 983

Huge balls

By Anonymous - 10/10/2021 19:04 - United States

Today, I had to pick up my son from school because he was constantly talking about his "Giant pen." In mid-July, I got him a giant-sized pen (writing utensil) and he liked it very much. Apparently, one of the teachers had their mind in the gutter and thought he was talking about… you know what. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 289

You deserved it 82

By sciencenat - 14/01/2016 06:36 - France - V?lizy-villacoublay

Today, as a natural science teacher, I was drawing a uterus on the class chalkboard. One of my students started messing around and being noisy, so I shouted, "Be quiet and check out my uterus!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 898

You deserved it 5 109

By Anonymous - 30/11/2009 02:39 - United States

Today, my mom sat on a pencil and started bleeding. She then made me clean the wound on her butt and put ointment on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 127

You deserved it 4 927

By Anonymous - 09/08/2009 00:02 - United States

Today, my mom went snooping through my art bin to "clean out my old drawings". She found numerous nude pieces and accused me of selling porn. My mom mistook and threw out 57 anatomy practice sketches that I worked very very hard on, and ripped up the remainder of my drawings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 069

You deserved it 3 540

By f_n_fail - 06/12/2016 21:31 - United States

Today, I got a note from my son's kindergarten teacher. During free time yesterday, he told her, "Mommy was stripping". I was indeed stripping. Paint that is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 181

You deserved it 721

By idkmybffjill? - 13/02/2009 04:12 - United States

Today, I was pestering a co-worker, so she jokingly stated "I'll bury you!" and I replied "I'll bury your mom!". Her moms funeral was last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 570

You deserved it 49 035

Lebeaugars95 20

Wednesday 9 April 2014 15:31

guess who the teacher called after that comment

SpunkyyyMonkeyy 10

Wednesday 9 April 2014 15:14

All you had to do was go to class with a pencil. I am sure McDonalds is hiring though.

Comments

Victormoon 14

Wednesday 9 April 2014 18:41

Haha you put yourself into that one dude

gotthatduff 5

Wednesday 9 April 2014 19:12

Oh my!!! I have found someone like me.

buckdharma 36

Wednesday 9 April 2014 19:16

She could get lead poisoning.

Not_Impressed13 9

Wednesday 9 April 2014 22:43

Nope. The "lead" in a pencil is actually graphite.

S1thembiso 2

Wednesday 9 April 2014 19:21

Lmao

FrancesShiver 20

Wednesday 9 April 2014 19:25

C'mon guys we all have those moments where we speak before we think okay

boredgirl_02 14

Wednesday 9 April 2014 19:35

Lol, I remember when that was big...forever ago

conman531 23

Wednesday 9 April 2014 20:18

Nice. Real nice

Dontalktome 9

Wednesday 9 April 2014 20:19

It is never to early to learn the concept of a mental filter.

lolfufun 4

Wednesday 9 April 2014 21:17

What kind of question is "what did you do with your pencil?"?

midnightm16 24

Wednesday 9 April 2014 21:50

How old are you?

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Today, I found out that morning after pills don't work if you're already ovulating. I also found out that I might become a father wayyyy sooner than expected. FML

I agree, your life sucks 125

You deserved it 531

Today, I tried dyeing my hair at home to save some money. I carefully followed the instructions but when I rinsed it off, my hair turned a shocking shade of shiity neon green. Not wanting to leave the house looking like a radioactive toad, I wore a hat and hoped nobody would notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 620

You deserved it 340

The Top

Today, my partner heard the cat about to puke and shoved her off the bed. I found this out in the morning. With my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 544

You deserved it 254

Today, we bought our first home after months of searching and years of saving. It's directly in the path of Hurricane Irma and may be destroyed before we even get the chance to move in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 958

You deserved it 418

Today, my psycho ex broke into my fiancée's apartment and cut up her expensive wedding dress. The nutjob is in jail now, but it doesn't seem like the wedding will be happening any time soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 326

You deserved it 1 380

Today, I went outside to enjoy the cool air without my glasses. I saw my neighbor doing the same, so I waved and said hi. When she didn't respond, I yelled and went back inside. It was only later when I went back out with my glasses on that I realized I was being ignored by a Halloween decoration. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 499

You deserved it 33 705

Today, the guy I like happened to be munching on biscuits while he was talking to me. The biscuit crumbs were literally falling out of his mouth like a waterfall as he was speaking and munching. The crumbs were landing in my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 547

You deserved it 273

Today, my 5-year-old daughter sobbed inconsolably on my return home from a several-month long deployment to the Middle East. I was touched by her reaction until she blurted out that she wasn't crying because she missed me, but because my shaved head looked scary ugly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 952

You deserved it 2 008

Same thing different taste

Sins of the Mother

Huge balls

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