Miscellaneous: Today, my mom told me that when my sister and I were born, the...

By fack - 26/11/2013 18:35 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my mom told me that when my sister and I were born, the first thing my dad said was, "I hope they don't turn out vegetarian." I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 540

You deserved it 10 178

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 21/06/2012 14:52 - United States - Medway

Today, when I told my family I was a vegetarian, I expected them to make fun of me because that's just my family. But what I wasn't expecting was my dad to use raw meat as a puppet and make it say, "Eat me! Eat me!" then throw it at my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 252

You deserved it 7 798

Go, Vegan!

By Cheryl - 16/10/2019 04:00

Today, my vegan sister told my kids where meat and dairy products come from, in a very detailed way. They now refuse to eat meat, and want to, "rescue all the poor animals." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 920

You deserved it 540

Proselytizing

By Jax - 17/11/2022 18:00

Today, my daughter came home from school crying hysterically. Apparently, her teacher is a vegan douchebag who told the whole class, "If your family eats meat, they're eating your future!" Now she screams when we eat meat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 446

You deserved it 206

By BFH4Life - 30/11/2011 09:27 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad announced to the whole family that we will be having a vegetarian dinner this Christmas to make my step-mum happy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 940

You deserved it 5 745

By Jlhfan90 - 03/10/2012 15:34 - United States

Today, I've been a vegan for a year. It's also the day that I met my dad's new best friend, who happens to be a retired butcher. They tried to pull an intervention on me for not "being sensible" by eating meat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 872

You deserved it 19 076

By Anonymous - 04/03/2016 20:22 - United States - Newark

Today, my vegan step-mom found out I ate at McDonald's yesterday. She gave me hell and asked me how it feels to give money to "murderers". All while my dad sat quietly by because he's too whipped to speak his mind. It wasn't even her house a month ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 148

You deserved it 1 725

By blondetergent - 20/06/2011 08:12 - Singapore

Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm a vegan. She replied, "So, you're allergic to meat?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 908

You deserved it 15 316

By fattie4life - 20/07/2009 22:33 - United States

Today, I was on the phone with my little sister as she explained that all these guys like her now that she's so skinny and beautiful. My mom must have overheard me tell my sister that at least I was a cuter child, because my mom laughed and said, "Yeah right, we had to buy you fat kid diapers." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 157

You deserved it 8 071

By anonymous - 27/06/2015 17:40 - United States

Today, my mom said that if I wasn't her daughter, she probably wouldn't even like me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 193

You deserved it 2 880

By Thebestman123 - 05/08/2011 02:45 - United States

Today, my mom was screaming at me and said, "I wish I'd never adopted you." I guess I'm adopted then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 075

You deserved it 3 223

mydadpulledout 17

Tuesday 26 November 2013 22:39

I'm sure he still loves you anyway. You're definitely missing out though, meat is wonderful!

BrockALee 14

Tuesday 26 November 2013 22:39

Wow. I'm glad your dad has his prioroties straight. Edit: sorry, 1's comment wasn't there when I posted mine.

Comments

143amandaott 10

Sunday 1 December 2013 6:25

I think ur dad just jinxed it! #lol

dafakeslimshady 12

Wednesday 13 January 2016 7:04

I'm sorry your such a disappointment

Cavsfodawin 21

Thursday 23 June 2016 0:27

You're retarded.

mastatheif 8

Wednesday 26 July 2017 1:39

The weak die....

InsanityShard 23

Thursday 16 November 2017 23:26

In didn't mean to hit YDI sorry!

InsanityShard 23

Thursday 16 November 2017 23:26

In didn't mean to hit YDI sorry!

peterblack67 9

Sunday 21 February 2021 2:54

And.....I don't get it.

randybryant799 20

Monday 13 December 2021 22:02

Oh no.

randybryant799 20

Friday 31 December 2021 6:25

That's the first thing he said? That seems rather odd.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my wife told me that when she was actually pregnant with her ex's child; she was insatiably horny and always wanted sex. Too bad for me, because the current pregnancy has made her repulsed by any sexual contact. Thanks for telling me, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 232

You deserved it 220

Today, I came from a 12-hour shift to find my clothes and stuff outside, and the locks changed. I called my mom to let me in and she told me, “Hell the fuck no, I’m not having a drug addicted junkie up in my house! You’re no longer my daughter!” and hung up. Apparently, she found my stash of weed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 887

You deserved it 689

The Top

Today, I was feeling rebellious, I decided to procrastinate instead of studying for my really important English test tomorrow. I was having a pretty good time until I realized my idea of procrastinating was cleaning my TI-83 graphing calculator with rubbing alcohol and Q-tips. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 927

You deserved it 53 335

Today, whilst presenting a report to the head of my college, I was arrested by a police officer for assault. I was in a bar the night before and accidentally bumped into a local tough guy on the way to the toilet. I got punched in the face. The witnesses got our names mixed up. That'll look great on my CV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 651

You deserved it 2 967

Today, my dad was telling me some childhood stories. He mentioned I once started sucking on a cow's udder when I was 2, and I asked why didn't he stop me. His response: "You were an accident and I wasn't good at the parenting thing". FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 651

You deserved it 1 840

Today, at my job at a pet store, my boss told me to go outside and hand out flyers. I saw a man sitting on a bench and walked up, saying, "Hi! Do you have a pet?" He teared up and said, "I just put her down this morning." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 232

You deserved it 178

Today, I guess my son's balls dropped. I've caught him humping his sister's Selena Gomez posters several times today. For god's sake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 728

You deserved it 1 922

Today, at work I was sitting on the toilet and a coworker came in and yelled, “That sounded like a big one!” and wouldn't leave until I left came out of the stall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 470

You deserved it 137

Same thing different taste

Go, Vegan!

Proselytizing

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