Intimacy: Today, my husband decided it would be funny to shout "Woohoo!"... - FML

By anonymous - 03/02/2011 05:17

Spicy

Today, my husband decided it would be funny to shout "Woohoo!" in Michael Jackson's voice while having an orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 276

You deserved it 6 449

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By mrssagdiyev - 05/03/2011 14:19 - United States

Spicy

Today, my husband decided to imitate Borat and shout "Very Nice! I Excite!" while having sex. He's also decided that it was ingenious and does it every single time, the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 611

You deserved it 5 436

By fmlalways - 22/01/2011 13:00 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, whilst having sex, my husband screamed out a man's name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 758

You deserved it 5 146

Honky

By Anonymous - 05/08/2015 14:06 - United States

Spicy

Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I let out a moan that can only really be described as sounding like a clown car horn. He ended up laughing so hard that he couldn't continue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 024

You deserved it 5 032

By anonymous - 19/02/2011 13:12 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having the best sex with my husband, and right when I reached climax, he shouted "Abracadabra!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 050

You deserved it 7 380

Revealing

By kitkat545 - 15/06/2009 23:18 - United States

Spicy

Today, my husband called me from work just to chat. He asked what I had been up to today. I was feeling frisky so I told him all about how I had gotten horny, watched a porno and masturbated earlier. It wasn't until I heard the hoots and laughter that I realized he had me on speakerphone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 058

You deserved it 50 970

Big kid

By Anonymous - 08/09/2012 14:20 - United States - Rhodes

Spicy

Today, I told my husband that I'm tired of feeling like his "blow-up doll". His response was to honk my boob and make squeaking noises. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 369

You deserved it 5 707

By Anonymous - 13/10/2012 21:54 - Australia - Brisbane

Spicy

Today, my husband decided that he simply couldn't exist any longer without giving me his own version of a wet-willy. He creeped up on me as I was sleeping and wiggled his wet penis around in my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 132

You deserved it 4 213

Grammy award winner

By blow away - 28/07/2014 04:36 - United States - Middletown

Spicy

Today, my husband played a recording of me breaking wind in my sleep to my whole family at the dinner table. To make matters worse, it was a compilation of different noises from over a long period of time. My family was horrified and my husband seemed proud of himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 353

You deserved it 4 565

No gods no masters

By Anonymous - 01/03/2024 09:00 - United States - North Royalton

Spicy

Today, during a intense orgasm I screamed, "You're my God!" at my husband. Afterwards, he told me I was blasphemous and reminded me that God smites those with false prophets. Needless to say, I think I'll just keep my mouth shut in the future. FML

I agree, your life sucks 350

You deserved it 126

By Kate - 07/06/2011 07:50 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was reading a crappy "How to spice up your marriage" book with my husband for laughs. One of the ideas was for the guy to whip his knob out, stand behind his girl and say "Can you say that into the microphone?" Now he does it every chance he gets, and I fall for it EVERY TIME. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 653

You deserved it 44 177

Next

Top comments

jewban 3

Thursday 3 February 2011 12:19

jamonaaaaa!!!!! HEeHEe

SirSantpoort 0

Thursday 3 February 2011 12:20

Its your husband.. Who cares if he makes a joke like that.. As long as he doesnt do it all the time :)

Comments

Mister_Grinch 0

Thursday 3 February 2011 17:46

Tell him to just BEAT IT the next time.

InsaneGenius 0

Thursday 3 February 2011 17:59

MJ didn't molest anybody! OP, if my husband and I didn't do silly things like that I would be really sad. If you can't laugh and have fun in the bedroom you must have a boring sex life.

PancakesEqualLov 0

Thursday 3 February 2011 18:02

dude, michael jackson is ******* awesome, mmkay? I love guys with a sense of humor, looks like you've got a keeper. enjoy.

headbanger08 0

Thursday 3 February 2011 18:14

I'm sure you think he's great. so tell me,does he really have all those teddy bears in his bed?

alicec123 0

Thursday 3 February 2011 19:05

YDI for not having a sense of humor.

disney_blonde 16

Thursday 3 February 2011 19:16

I'm getting kind of tired of all these "I have no sense of humor in bed" FMLs. Really...FML is f*** my LIFE...is your whole LIFE really impacted by such a small comical moment?

lostfaithinpppl 19

Thursday 3 February 2011 19:44

I don't get it. It's his ******. He can chose to make whatever noises he wants to during HIS ******. OP, get a life and a sense of humor.

ChibiGirl5 0

Thursday 3 February 2011 20:42

Lol

HomeAl0ne 20

Thursday 3 February 2011 20:55

Really? I prefer singing "Another one bites the dust!" by Freddie Mercury.

Neylin 7

Thursday 3 February 2011 21:36

*Queen.

bowlclogger 5

Thursday 3 February 2011 21:45

And this is an FML . . . why?

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 41 409

You deserved it 2 826

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I agree, your life sucks 8 280

You deserved it 49 810

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 30 933

You deserved it 2 004

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I agree, your life sucks 24 470

You deserved it 4 483

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I agree, your life sucks 54 202

You deserved it 4 325

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I agree, your life sucks 32 081

You deserved it 6 071

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I agree, your life sucks 1 376

You deserved it 196

Today, my daughter came home from school crying hysterically. Apparently, her teacher is a vegan douchebag who told the whole class, "If your family eats meat, they're eating your future!" Now she screams when we eat meat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 417

You deserved it 205