By Iguana - 12/09/2012 02:35 - Canada - Oromocto

Spicy
Today, my boyfriend invited me over to "play with his lizard." After excitedly rushing across town, I realized this wasn't a euphemism, he actually bought an Iguana. FML
I agree, your life sucks 14 707
You deserved it 28 750

Same thing different taste

Top comments

FMLshark 12

Sounds like the same boyfriend who wanted to test water displacement in the bathtub with his girlfriend.

I would have been pretty excited anyway. Iguanas are cool.

Comments

i dont recall ever refering to my penis as a lizard...makes me feel like its got legs. i prefer snake

I'm pretty sure if you wanted to play with his other 'lizard' you could've asked or just taken it out yourself and had some fun with if(: I'm pretty sure he would've liked it and you would've gotten what you were so excited about.. Be happy your boyfriend shares stuff like this with you. Have fun with the iguana!

simplylost643 0

#15- "Just taken it out yourself and had some fun with it". Thank you! Proactive women like yourself is what this world needs more of. Bless your heart!

#15, The question is how the iguana would react to another lizard. Competition?

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

this was a reference to a previous FML. are we not allowed to do that here? I'm new.

It's allowed, but judging by the number of downvotes people either didn't recognize it as such, or just didn't find it very funny.

Because apparently this is the way the world works now: No sex makes life worthless and horrible. Hence the amount of sex-related posts on fml. Because, you know, there's nothing worse than not getting laid when you want.

Because most on here are in their teens and 20's, and that's when the juices are flowin' the most! :)

"juices are flowin" that's the unsexiest phrase ever.

simplylost643 0

#51- Try doing anything when the juices aren't flowing and tell me how sexy that is!

bandit1971 18

Lizards are awesome though :<

kittykat1501 31

snakes hiss, and the way you put that is the typed version of stuttering. if it was indeed a snake you would type "ssssssorry" instead.

LOL ! Oh no OP, that sucks! You should have played with his pet lizard and jumped him afterwards ;D I'm sure he would have gotten the hint then! Better luck next time! *kisses!!!!*

rainbowbigbird 7

I like to play with my boyfriend's lizard. We call him POGO. Pogo is a bearded dragon. You thought I was talking about...? Oh, you.

brianfantana32 10

I expected a bearded dragon from the beginning.

Tragichero92 12

Eragon 2, now comes with a beard.

I would be pumped to play with my boyfriend's lizard if he had one! I don't understand how you can mistake his lizard for...

I'm not entirely sure how the chick even assumed that her dude was talking about his dong. Whatever.