Love: Today, me and my girlfriend went to the club. The song "Single...

By dumpedattheclub - 28/03/2009 03:40 - United States

Today, me and my girlfriend went to the club. The song "Single Ladies" by Beyonce came on; the DJ came on the mic and said "Single ladies raise your hands!" My girlfriend raised her hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 974

You deserved it 7 261

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Same thing different taste

By oddbrien - 13/12/2016 03:34 - United States - Baltimore

Today, while at the club, I started dancing with a girl who I had noticed throughout the night. When she turned around she firmly stated, "I'd much rather dance by myself". FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 510

You deserved it 4 371

By intranator - 08/04/2009 21:43 - Jordan

Today, I waited in line to get into a club with my girlfriend, the bouncer only let her in, she told me to call her if I needed anything and left me. We were supposed to celebrate my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 117 920

You deserved it 9 689

By Anonymous - 07/12/2012 21:28 - United States

Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 525

You deserved it 3 188

He bangs the drums

By PhilDavisDied? - 30/09/2010 10:33 - France

Today, after pulling up to my girlfriend's house for dinner with her parents, one of my favorite songs begin to play on the radio. After my 3 minutes of air drumming, I look up to see my girlfriend and her parents bouncing with laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 126

You deserved it 35 043

By Anonymous - 03/12/2011 02:02 - United Kingdom

Today, at a nightclub, a cute girl started hitting on me. I got into it and we danced. Just as she started getting frisky with me, a guy shoved me off, smacked me to the floor with a right-hook, and shouted, "That's what you get for touching my woman." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 835

You deserved it 4 731

Shut up

By Anonymous - 14/05/2019 20:00

Today, a girl came up to me on a club dance floor and said, “Shut up and dance with me,” like the song lyrics, only I fell over on her while dancing, and she dislocated her ankle. I don’t think this woman is gonna be my destiny after that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 762

You deserved it 336

By therealkathl - 05/03/2015 13:32 - Austria

Today, my boyfriend convinced a girl at the club to break up with her boyfriend and go home with him. She did. Now I'm single too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 288

You deserved it 3 424

By Anonymous - 14/02/2014 01:31 - United States

Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 992

You deserved it 7 253

By I Tried - 29/01/2016 22:18 - United States - Burton

Today, I went out clubbing and hit the dance floor, hoping to impress some girls with my moves. All I got was a bunch of weird looks and was told by one girl that I'm the "whitest black guy" she's ever seen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 448

You deserved it 3 639

By Anonymous - 02/02/2013 23:03 - Belgium - Schepdaal

Today, I went to a club with my girlfriend and her buddies. An hour in, I saw her making out with a guy on the dance floor, so I confronted her. She stormed off to the bar and said something to her friend, who then came over and angrily slapped me across the face. Yeah, I'm confused too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 267

You deserved it 3 771

darkfaery 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 11:02

If you two are not married, then technically, she IS single. And if you don't want her to be single, then you ought to put a ring on it!

Carolaaine 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 10:47

As long as she doesn't try to kiss another boy (or boyS) you're quite safe.. It's just a song

Comments

jsmith1199 0

Friday 3 April 2009 0:43

**** #88 you're just retarded #90.. YOU'RE the fool

yesbutnotyou 0

Tuesday 7 April 2009 19:53

put a ring on it!!!!!

jsmith1199 0

Tuesday 7 April 2009 20:47

I hope you raised your hand too.. And then brought it down right on her face

hattar 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 6:23

Ur girlfriends a bitch!

fuckedup666 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 10:19

Wow, you are taking this way too seriously. Stop being paranoid!

NoSunHere 0

Monday 13 April 2009 18:20

You said "me and my girlfriend" not my wife and I...technically, she is a single girl WTF are you complaining about?

LubbyDubby23 0

Monday 20 April 2009 5:43

lol thats so funny. but dont take it so serious it's only a song :) cheer up kiddo ;)

24788 6

Wednesday 29 April 2009 9:41

I think she was just trying to have fun.

lamisscrown 0

Saturday 16 May 2009 14:03

DAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM she smooth

fireballa18 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 22:14

that happened to me too!!!

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I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 9

Today, I was eating out with a group of friends and my boyfriend. During the meal, I accidentally took a sip from my male friend's glass. My boyfriend pointed and said, "Babe, you took his drink." My friend responded by putting his arm round me and saying, "Whatever, I took her virginity." FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 090

You deserved it 18 232

The Top

Today, I learned that even when you put a sock on the door because you are having sex with your boyfriend, it doesn't mean your mom won't walk into your brand new apartment for a "surprise visit." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 417

You deserved it 10 506

Today, my husband woke up, tried walking to the bathroom, fell down, got back up and started peeing on the carpet. I’ve never seen him this drunk before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 267

You deserved it 165

Today, my boss told me his cancer test results came back positive. I congratulated him and asked how he planned to celebrate. It turns out a positive cancer test result is a bad thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 761

You deserved it 62 594

Today, I managed to scare my wife by walking round the corner on my way to the bathroom. Somehow this scared her so bad, she decided she’s done with my shit and wants a divorce. I just needed to pee. I never play pranks on her, so how can she tired of pranks. What did I do wrong? FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 68

Today, I attended a family reunion, during which my grandma gave me "relationship advice" in front of everyone. She's been married five times, and her longest marriage lasted a whole 6 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 651

You deserved it 80

Today, someone in my 8-floor appartment building got an airhorn. They seem to enjoy using it. I can't work out where they are. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 666

You deserved it 3 123

Same thing different taste

He bangs the drums

Shut up

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