Health: Today, is the third day my ring won't come off. I used soap,...

By Madi Jenna - 04/05/2011 17:31 - United States

Today, is the third day my ring won't come off. I used soap, vegetable oil, lotion, soaked my hand in ice to make the swelling of my finger to come down, and even my mom pulled so hard she dislocated my finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 241

You deserved it 5 854

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Same thing different taste

By Tampax - 30/09/2014 18:46 - Spain - Cuenca

Today, my hand was stung by a wasp. It has resulted in all my fingers being swollen and therefore much bigger than usual. I'm getting married tomorrow and there's no way I can get the ring on my finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 288

You deserved it 3 197

By meganridner - 04/08/2011 16:05 - United States

Today, I went mud wrestling for the first time at a mud bog. After a day of fun and getting cleaned up, I realized that my mom's ring was no longer on my finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 539

You deserved it 53 229

By lisa - 22/12/2010 18:03 - United States

Today, my recently married friend took off her wedding ring to make bread. Being single and pathetic, I tried it on to see what it would look like. It got stuck on my finger. The ER doctor had to cut it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 452

You deserved it 51 754

Controlling

By Anonymous - 01/11/2023 18:02 - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me that the ring I wear on my ring finger needs to come off because it's too big. It's too big because I bought it for him and he gave it back to me 6 months later. I've been wearing it on the same finger for the last 3 months with no problems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 309

You deserved it 87

By Bigpoppa0507 - 31/08/2011 14:02 - Canada

Today, while playing with bubble wrap, I dislocated my thumb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 403

You deserved it 14 643

What? How? Why?

By Anonymous - 17/03/2021 22:01 - United States - Boise

Today, I smashed my finger with a hammer. A finger on the hand holding the hammer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 694

You deserved it 300

By BudmaudeY - 31/03/2011 20:53 - Sweden

Today, I noticed that the injury on my hand from three weeks ago no longer hurt. A while later, I accidentally slammed that same hand in a door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 428

You deserved it 15 823

By ouchouchouch - 28/03/2012 04:16 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, I was adjusting my nose piercing from the inside. My mother saw and thought I was picking my nose, so she slapped my hand away, tearing my nose ring out in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 516

You deserved it 9 026

By fuckmeintheeyewitharing - 03/07/2016 12:52 - United States - La Mesa

Today, I was polishing a ring I made at a jewelry shop I intern at. The ring flicked off my fingers and smashed me in the eye. It only took a single trip to the emergency room to make me pretty sure I won't be getting the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 799

You deserved it 1 388

Glassed

By Penny - 17/10/2021 02:00

Today, I reached for my lip balm while laying in bed in the dark. I accidentally knocked my bedside lamp, and it fell on my hand and shattered. A huge glass fragment impaled my hand. I just got out of surgery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 870

You deserved it 150

zelhackin 0

Wednesday 4 May 2011 22:16

get Gollum to help you he's really good at that

greg84_fml 21

Wednesday 4 May 2011 22:16

Looks likes it's time to cut it off.

Comments

CaughRedHanded 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 6:05

... you do know that hot water makes stuff like that expand? ....

Skatejock21 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 6:56

Are you preggo? did you break your finger? too much salt? eat too much fast food? dehydration? ever think of cutting it off?!?

stephoria 2

Thursday 5 May 2011 7:00

HOLY SHIT that would hurt.

SpeshulK 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 7:12

It would've been great if you farted right when she dislocated your finger (pull my finger, if you don't get it)

Night7 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 7:50

fat fingers

DaveOnDope 4

Thursday 5 May 2011 7:53

So marry the asshole, or cut your finger off. Simple!

JokerJohn7 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 8:07

lose some weight. that's probably the only way at this point

kjcamaro3 5

Thursday 5 May 2011 8:09

windex....

Classlfied 4

Thursday 5 May 2011 8:31

You can probably get it off if you cut some calories.

sweetTnt_fml 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 10:03

happens to me all da time wit condoms...I kno da feelin

redbluegreen 40

Thursday 5 May 2011 11:44

Probably best to keep that kinda thing between you and your internet service provider.

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Today, I thought it would be fun to post a throwback photo of myself in high school on Facebook. I didn't realize I was still logged into my work account. Now all my colleagues and clients have seen my awkward teenage years, complete with braces, pimples, and an unfortunate haircut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 90

You deserved it 530

Today, while fighting unemployment and an visible abscess on my neck, I was cajoled into attending my Mom's birthday party. I spent the entire time at the restaurant trying to hide an oozing sore with a bandage, eating partially edible food. The cost? $40 I can't afford to spend on food not worth $5. FML

I agree, your life sucks 407

You deserved it 107

The Top

Today, my house got robbed, while I was upstairs taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 214

You deserved it 6 126

Today, in a waiting room, my 4-year-old daughter told me she saw two guys kissing. I quietly explained that some men like men, they're gay, and normal like everyone else. I was pleased with myself until the woman across from me scoffed and muttered, "Disgusting." FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 480

You deserved it 8 366

Today, I had to be treated for chemical burns, because my mother got the bright idea of using paint thinner to clean me up after I'd painted our living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 421

You deserved it 3 037

Today, my older brother managed to convince my younger sister that she's actually a boy, and that she'll soon be getting a penis in the mail, which she excitedly told everyone she could. He convinced me of the exact same thing as well several years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 509

You deserved it 7 051

Today, while breast feeding my 7 month-old before his nap, I hummed his favorite song as I rocked. He pulled away, stared at me, and cried til I shut up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 896

You deserved it 5 125

Today, I asked my mom if I could borrow $20 since I don’t get paid until Friday. She responded with, “Why don’t you return those packages that arrived this week from your online shopping sprees?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 164

You deserved it 2 179

Same thing different taste

Controlling

What? How? Why?

Glassed

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