Health: Today, I won a lifetime supply of pineapples. One problem, I'm...

By dusk - 05/01/2012 08:09 - United States

Today, I won a lifetime supply of pineapples. One problem, I'm allergic to pineapples. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 028

You deserved it 4 235

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Same thing different taste

By ShellShocked - 30/03/2013 04:06 - United States

Today, I turned 18. My parents got me a pineapple and a pair of socks. I'm allergic to pineapple, and the socks are too small. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 822

You deserved it 3 065

Juicy

By Anonymous - 06/08/2023 18:00

Today, I got excited when I learned that the fruit on the trees by my apartment building was ripe and free to pick. I picked myself some juicy summer plums and enjoyed them. Minutes later, my tongue started burning painfully. Turns out, I'm allergic to plums. FML

I agree, your life sucks 958

You deserved it 115

By Dammit - 07/07/2012 04:45 - United States - Long Beach

Today, I found out that I'm allergic to bacon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 541

You deserved it 5 867

By aelia_oups - 31/12/2012 22:09 - France - Taverny

Today, as I have been for 10 years, I'm allergic to fruit. After an argument with my mother, she yelled, "Here, have a banana and go kill yourself!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 326

You deserved it 7 534

By Anonymous - 16/02/2011 05:14 - United States

Today, I had an asthma attack. I grabbed my inhaler and found peanut butter on it. I'm extremely allergic to peanuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 955

You deserved it 3 982

Big tongue logging on

By Anonymous - 09/09/2020 23:01 - United States - Norwich

Today, I spent seven dollars to find out I’m allergic to kiwi. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 090

You deserved it 170

By Anonymous - 22/04/2013 18:42 - United States - Lebanon

Today, I found out that I am allergic to one of the preservatives that they put in aloe. I found this out after I put some on a severe sunburn I have. Not only am I sunburned, but now I am severely itchy as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 044

You deserved it 4 186

Ring of fire

By Anonymous - 12/03/2021 23:01

Today, I learned the hard way that I'm allergic to a particular brand of tampon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 174

You deserved it 78

By Anonymous - 25/02/2013 05:44 - United States - Saint Louis

Today, I came home from a rough day working two jobs to find a plate of cookies on my desk with a note from my roommates saying, "You deserve it!" I happily broke one in half to eat and discovered they contained coconut. I'm allergic to coconut, a fact both of my roommates are aware of. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 543

You deserved it 3 743

By djshahso - 26/02/2010 00:14 - United States

Today, I decided it would be funny to give my friend a peanut that had fallen on the floor. I hid it in his food, and started laughing when he ate it. It turns out he is allergic to peanuts. His family hates me now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 669

You deserved it 46 973

kidwiththeface42 7

Thursday 5 January 2012 12:07

Too bad you don't live under the sea. I'm sure there's a real estate market for bachelor sponges.

UrLyfSuxx 0

Thursday 5 January 2012 12:05

Pineapple stand :)

Comments

hollycesena 0

Thursday 5 January 2012 20:40

You could build SpongeBob SquarePants a mansion....just a suggestion.

ILoveBabyPeter 0

Thursday 5 January 2012 20:54

No one said you had to EAT them!!! IMAGINATION

EpeeGirl 1

Thursday 5 January 2012 21:02

Sell them?

RainbowPanda1699 0

Thursday 5 January 2012 21:42

Where the hell do you win a lifetime supply of pineapples

LikeA_PandaBear 4

Thursday 5 January 2012 21:49

That's exactly what I'm wondering ..

2dog 15

Thursday 5 January 2012 21:48

Sell them, there are some people who will do anything for pineapple. I know what it feels like to be allergic to pineapples. Hang in there op

la_gata_0716 5

Thursday 5 January 2012 21:57

Sell it! Make money out of it!! :)

atamaga 0

Thursday 5 January 2012 22:00

Sell them.

ClaremoreZebra 8

Thursday 5 January 2012 22:01

How does one, win a lifetime supply of pineapples in Colorado?

rawrisforsami 13

Thursday 5 January 2012 22:54

I was thinking the same thing...

GogoTheGreat 12

Thursday 5 January 2012 22:12

Give them to charaties and as gifts.

sentinel_233 0

Thursday 5 January 2012 22:28

Sell them

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The Top

Today, my housemate picked me up from the psychiatric ward, after I'd spent ten days there with a major depressive episode. She said that she thought it rather odd that I'd gotten so bad, since she'd replaced my antidepressants with homeopathic pills. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 579

You deserved it 90

Today, I discovered my 3-year-old daughter's artistic skills. She managed to draw an elaborate mural on our living room wall. The masterpiece? A stick figure family, including our dog, but instead of a tail, he has a second head. She of course used permanent markers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 146

The Top

Today, I was listening to a local radio station, and they did a segment called "food porn." As they were sexually describing various types of food, I actually found myself getting turned on over a pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 900

You deserved it 10 071

Today, I had an art class with my girlfriend. The teacher assigned "anti-cards", or cards for unusual or bad occasions. My girlfriend decided to make a "break-up" card, and I helped her write the poem inside it. After class, she gave it to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 242

You deserved it 6 463

Today, my doctor told me that my lungs are as bad as a 60-year-old heavy smoker's. I'm 19 and I've never touched a cigarette in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 084

You deserved it 234

Today, I had to lie to my boyfriend and tell him that the red bumps around my nipples was heat rash, rather than admit it was actually razor burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 252

You deserved it 9 593

Today, I finally convinced my son to use the potty. Later, he saw a show on TV about a toilet monster. Now he's too scared to even step foot into the bathroom. Here's to another few months of diaper changes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 953

You deserved it 4 501

Today, we had guests coming over. My dad wanted me to make some bacon, but I refused because I'm a vegetarian, and don't like to touch meat. His response? 'Good joke honey, now make the bacon.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 062

You deserved it 19 236

Same thing different taste

Juicy

Big tongue logging on

Ring of fire

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