Transportation: Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use...

By Anonymous - 12/08/2011 10:40 - Australia

Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use the one next to me. As he approached, he said, "Friendly spy plane inbound" and pretended to look at my knob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 152

You deserved it 2 967

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Same thing different taste

By longest minute - 25/05/2016 11:28 - United States - Cypress

Today, I was peeing in a public bathroom when a guy walked in and passed by 4 open urinals to use the one next to mine. After feeling his gaze for a second, I confronted him with my own, in hopes he would stop. Instead, I stared into a stranger's eyes until I finished peeing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 721

You deserved it 2 668

By toosmall - 31/01/2009 21:40 - United States

Today, at the urinal a guy came up next to me to do his business. He stared over at me, looked down, laughed and then left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 604

You deserved it 2 605

By Anonymous - 26/09/2011 18:52 - United States

Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 046

You deserved it 3 547

Dude! Boundaries!

By devinbyrne - 05/03/2011 20:26 - United States

Today, I was in the bathroom, when someone came up behind me. Instead of waiting for a urinal to free up, he wedged his way in between me and another guy, and promptly began peeing in my urinal, crossing streams in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 729

You deserved it 3 758

By Anna - 13/07/2013 04:40 - United States - New York

Today, I was using a public restroom. As I lowered my pants, a man's head and arms popped out over the divider. He took a picture and immediately rushed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 322

You deserved it 3 219

By DrewK - 14/05/2013 20:09 - United States - Great Falls

Today, I went into the men's restroom and started peeing in a urinal next to a middle-age man. As he zipped up and walked away, he said to me, "Don't worry, it'll grow." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 878

You deserved it 4 525

Stranger danger

By Anonymous - 20/11/2014 16:35 - United States - Calhoun

Today, while using a public toilet, a guy started pissing beside me at the urinal. The breach of bathroom etiquette then escalated to him taking a long look down at me and saying, "Nice sack, dude." followed by him finishing up and leaving without even washing his hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 553

You deserved it 2 811

By not cool - 28/06/2013 05:16 - Australia - Sunnybank

Today, while using a urinal in a very busy mall bathroom, another man unzipped his pants and attempted to use the same one as me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 806

You deserved it 3 177

By fviz - 07/02/2013 09:51 - United States

Today, while using a public restroom to change my tampon, I made eye contact with someone looking at me through the little space in the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 170

You deserved it 2 792

By hardee fucking har yourself, sir - 07/08/2013 22:00 - United Kingdom - Stockport

Today, a guy started taking a leak beside me at the urinal. Evidently he figured he wasn't being enough of a cockbite, because he looked at my junk, laughed, "HAH!" then broke down into hysterics and totally lost control of his stream. I smell like piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 587

You deserved it 4 048

smashingdiscover 0

Friday 12 August 2011 18:48

Enemy spotted

annajane 0

Friday 12 August 2011 18:48

Pretended to? You sure about that?

Comments

baconstrips 12

Friday 12 August 2011 18:51

hahahaha best FML I've seen in a while

Kammasaurus_Sex 7

Friday 12 August 2011 18:52

You sure you didn't pretend that he pretended? :/

newjerseyguy 0

Friday 12 August 2011 20:06

I'm thinking he played along and pretended to be a spyplane as well

smexehXredhead0 0

Friday 12 August 2011 18:54

Since when is there a "pretending to look at your dick"? Wouldn't he just be looking at it?

ksj3 0

Friday 12 August 2011 20:06

would you look at it?

JakeLee 6

Saturday 13 August 2011 17:25

that's all you can do. just gotta look at it

spd2fst4u 5

Friday 12 August 2011 18:54

I have a feeling he wanted to say proceeded.

enonymous 8

Friday 12 August 2011 18:55

I always liked "open the hanger spy plane coming in" brings me back to my childhood in a public bathroom

8sq 13

Friday 12 August 2011 18:56

WTF. People are just so weird nowadays.

8sq 13

Friday 12 August 2011 18:58

Oops

stroudie94 9

Friday 12 August 2011 18:59

Counter spy plane in the sky (fist in his face)

Penn2894 6

Friday 12 August 2011 19:02

I'd tell him the air space was full to capacity and he'd have to continue away a good damn distance.

AubreasLuv 1

Friday 12 August 2011 19:02

he is a ******* win

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I agree, your life sucks 11 153

You deserved it 68 066

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 28 268

You deserved it 4 532

Today, I was setting up a computer before a big work meeting. I noticed the software they were using had a text to speech feature. I thought it would be funny to make it say obscene things, then delete it. When the meeting started, the speakers blared, “The VP is gay hahahaha” in a robotic voice. I was fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 135

You deserved it 1 759

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I agree, your life sucks 53 942

You deserved it 6 300

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I agree, your life sucks 50 719

You deserved it 3 725

Today, I was at a choir convention, and everyone sings the national anthem outside their rooms each night. I was not informed and took a shower. My roommates opened the door, yanked me out, and locked me out of the room to sing wearing just a towel. The guy down the hall was video taping it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 501

You deserved it 4 189

Today, I was buying a specific expensive wine for my wife’s birthday, but the guy suspected I was buying it for some underage girl loitering outside, and threatened to call police. He’s a specialist wine merchant and the only guy I can buy that wine from in 100 miles. Her birthday is in two days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 048

You deserved it 115

Same thing different taste

Dude! Boundaries!

Stranger danger

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