Intimacy: Today, I was the only cash register open at the local supermarket....

By Narehs - 13/01/2010 01:05 - United States

Today, I was the only cash register open at the local supermarket. I had to sell condoms and chocolate frosting to my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 235

You deserved it 2 902

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Same thing different taste

By tammy - 27/06/2012 05:05 - United States - Inglewood

Today, while cashiering at the drug store, I saw my ex-boyfriend, who I'm still completely in love with. Being the only cashier, I had to ring him up. He was buying condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 124

You deserved it 3 616

By ash - 18/05/2016 20:00 - United States - Winnebago

Today, I went shopping on my only day off. The only aisle open was self-checkout. I'm a cashier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 975

You deserved it 1 772

By yournick - 31/01/2011 21:23 - Canada

Today, at my job as a cashier, a very old man came through my checkout. His purchase consisted of a box of condoms and a can of whipped cream. The creepy smile he gave me has scarred me for life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 243

You deserved it 4 831

Presumption

By fmlgrl - 30/07/2012 06:59 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I went to a corner store to restock my chocolate stash. A guy from work walked in to see me and the cashier arguing about the amount of candy I was trying to buy with a jar of pennies. He took one look at me and said, "That time of the month, eh?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 739

You deserved it 27 156

Make believe

By SN MetalMilitia - 03/11/2020 05:02

Today, I once again bought condoms at the gas station to make the people who work there think that I have a sex life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 405

You deserved it 1 337

By useless pos - 01/03/2013 00:48 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I went out to buy a bottle of wine and some condoms. As the cashier scanned the condoms, she snickered and muttered, "Yeah right." She was right; I really was just desperate to look like I have a sex life. I got so upset that I left my items and walked out with tears in my eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 274

You deserved it 12 351

By Anonymous - 24/07/2013 20:56 - United States - South Hadley

Today, I was buying condoms but was a little embarrassed so I went to the self-check. I scanned the condoms, then a magazine and tried to put the condoms under the magazines to hide them. The store guy saw me, thought I was shoplifting and I was kicked out of the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 833

You deserved it 15 932

By rink.attendant.6 - 21/06/2012 15:40 - Canada - Dryden

Today, I saw my crush working the only open till at the grocery store. When she saw me approach her queue, she immediately called for more cashiers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 126

You deserved it 3 600

By RahiYeah09 - 17/09/2009 18:45 - United States

Today, I was in the 'intimacy' section of Walmart. After grabbing 2 boxes of condoms and a vibrating ring I turn around to see my ex boyfriend's mom. I smile awkwardly and put my head down as I walk away, causing me to colide with his dad and send my 'goodies' all over the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 260

You deserved it 7 183

By totallyembarassed - 07/07/2012 04:08 - United States - Charlotte

Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 993

You deserved it 28 756

DynamicDave 11

Wednesday 13 January 2010 9:26

Awkward turtle

firecopy 6

Wednesday 13 January 2010 14:09

yea and the condoms were for baloons!

Comments

VegHead13 0

Thursday 14 January 2010 1:04

Haha they prob did that on purpose to bug u.

DaleksAreEpic 0

Thursday 14 January 2010 1:21

This post seems suspiciously familiar.

axelkg 0

Thursday 14 January 2010 5:13

I'm sick of people like you #3. like seriously, what does it take to qualify for a real fml in your mind? it's like the only thing that would be okay is if the OP got hit by a train and died or something. lighten up.

daneeyoll 0

Thursday 14 January 2010 5:35

fail

sweetpea129 0

Thursday 14 January 2010 6:35

awwkwarddd. don't let it get to you though. I'm sure he did it on purpose,

roryrobotic 5

Thursday 14 January 2010 6:58

I agree with #31. People need to quit critiquing everything and shut up. Nobody gives a **** how intellectually challenged you are.

dance_and_alive 0

Thursday 14 January 2010 8:55

i know how this feels op. weather a fake or not, shit sucks real bad.

paladininwaiting 1

Thursday 14 January 2010 16:54

ok...where's the FML? Do you still love him,....or do you just miss the condoms and chocolate frosting?

suckmysarcasm 10

Thursday 14 January 2010 20:05

reminds me of that song sex and candy.

haydog12 0

Friday 15 January 2010 6:08

hahahahaha that sucks hardcore

Keywords

Video games Gamers Annoying Cute Kids Money Birthday Weird Awkward Love Health Relatable Abuse Scams Social Media School Education Parents Anger issues Teenagers Family Relationship advice Capitalism Miscellaneous Public freakouts Mental health Grieving Music Geek Poopoo peepee

The Top

Today, my mother, who thinks I'm a virgin, called me while I was having sex with my boyfriend. I have to answer every time she calls or she freaks out. I ended the conversation quickly and hung up. Or so I thought. She listened in to the rest of our 20-minute lovemaking session, and I have some explaining to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 792

You deserved it 1 709

Today, after spotting my ex-boyfriend's truck in a desolate parking lot, I decided to "decorate" the muddy side of it with a rather large male appendage. After checking around me to make sure there were no witnesses, I got to work. I probably should have made sure he wasn't sitting in the truck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 280

You deserved it 49 810

The Top

Today, I found out the Tinder girl I'd ghosted after going on a date with her committed suicide. They came to me for answers because I was the last known person that ever talked to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 273

You deserved it 830

Today, I received 46 emails from co-workers who were using reply-all to tell everyone else not to use reply-all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 258

You deserved it 2 041

Today, I went on a blind date. My date turned out to be very hot, and I had high hopes. That is, until she ran her hand through her hair as she approached, sending some kind of horrifying, miasmic mist of dandruff and dead skin floating through the air behind her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 166

You deserved it 8 123

Today, I watched my manager take his entire in tray of customer complaints and tip them straight into the recycling without reading them. At least this explains why we are consistently the “best store in the region for customer satisfaction.” Now I don’t know what to do about what I saw FML

I agree, your life sucks 774

You deserved it 119

Today, I came home from a crazy costume party and took a hot shower. When I opened my eyes and saw the water running from my head was bloody, I freaked out and called my friend for help. She had to remind me that for the party, I'd coloured my hair red with washable hair dye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 666

You deserved it 17 287

Today, a customer brought his cat in to be euthanized. I told him to "have a nice day" as he was leaving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 564

You deserved it 4 407

Same thing different taste

Presumption

Make believe

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