Miscellaneous: Today, I was sleeping like a baby on our living room couch. My...

By Ep1cF4ce - 26/07/2011 04:03 - United States

Today, I was sleeping like a baby on our living room couch. My older brother and his friends lit my slippers on fire. While I was wearing them. They even took a video. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 084

You deserved it 3 419

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 11/01/2015 08:44

Today, my brother woke me up by trying to light my bed on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 936

You deserved it 2 839

By girl on fire - 03/09/2015 00:32

Today, my idiot kid brother set my shirt on fire with a magnifying glass while I was taking a nap outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 413

You deserved it 2 721

Release the tapes!

By Anonymous - 01/07/2021 00:01

Today, for the second time in my life, I fell and got stuck between my wall and my bed wrapped in a blanket, mad. Instead of helping me, my brother just took videos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 685

You deserved it 313

By desertpunk75 - 19/01/2011 03:40 - United States

Today, my friends thought it'd be funny to hold lighters under the smoke alarms while I was sleeping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 837

You deserved it 3 165

By Anonymous - 08/08/2009 11:49 - United States

Today, I woke up in my friend's living room after our sleepover. I heard her hot older brother and his friends in the kitchen. Feeling confident, I exposed my midriff a little bit just to give them a peek. They groaned and threw a blanket over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 874

You deserved it 64 805

By RosaP - 28/02/2009 06:40 - Canada

Today, I slept over at a friend's house. We decided to dress up as ninjas and play a trick on her younger brothers, sleeping in the basement. While sneaking down the stairs, in the dark, her mother came home. Thinking I was a robber, she beat me with a lamp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 328

You deserved it 42 363

Bad pranks are annoying

By Anonymous - 17/01/2020 20:00

Today, my sister snuck into the bathroom while I was in the shower (the lock is broken) and took my clothes and towels. I came out and quickly went to my room. As I went in, my sister was sitting on my bed with two friends watching TV. I instantly covered up, but they saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 680

You deserved it 311

What a massive clock

By Rhianna - 22/11/2009 04:05 - Australia

Today, I was babysitting my younger brother while my parents were away. I turned my back on my brother for one minute and then I heard a huge crash from their room. He had somehow destroyed a family heirloom and 200 year-old clock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 442

You deserved it 7 677

By Anonymous - 06/11/2010 11:45 - Australia

Today, my brother flicked a huge bug onto my foot, making me freak out and fall into my outdoors pool. The water was so cold that I started hyperventilating. My brother left to "get help". I finally managed to get out, and found him watching TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 319

You deserved it 5 595

Sexy morning

By Anonymous - 15/01/2020 00:00 - United Kingdom - Stockport

Today, my sister woke me up panicking saying our kitchen was on fire, and we had to leave. She practically dragged me out of bed and all the way to the front door. When we got outside, she suddenly kneed me in the nuts and went back inside, locking the door behind her. I was only wearing boxers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 740

You deserved it 274

HollyoaksFan93 9

Tuesday 26 July 2011 12:09

Set his hair on fire while he's sleeping..

Mirorbo 26

Tuesday 26 July 2011 12:09

The idea of 'humor' in the human mind is turning rather primitive these days...

Comments

UnknownParticle 7

Tuesday 26 July 2011 21:54

can i haz utube link plyz?

beachchick22 0

Tuesday 26 July 2011 21:57

well u can take a video of him...im sure many people would lik to see a human being wit an I.Q. in the single digits

deannaK0888 3

Tuesday 26 July 2011 22:21

I often wonder where that expression 'sleeping like a baby' came from seeing as in reality babies wake up every few hours and ball their eyes out!

1234miagirl 4

Tuesday 26 July 2011 22:46

I hope to see this on youtube! lol

mutinykitty 18

Tuesday 26 July 2011 23:57

lol that sucks, though, they could've burnt the house down.

skyorpia101 4

Wednesday 27 July 2011 0:31

hmmmmm........... congratulations that is one dumb ass of a brother you got there ;)

angel1399 0

Wednesday 27 July 2011 0:55

show the video

rohanp 0

Wednesday 27 July 2011 1:15

vid or it didnt happen.

badactor009 0

Wednesday 27 July 2011 1:35

He must be daim braimaged.

Unstoppabl3 0

Wednesday 27 July 2011 4:49

Youtube?

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I went to a corner store to restock my chocolate stash. A guy from work walked in to see me and the cashier arguing about the amount of candy I was trying to buy with a jar of pennies. He took one look at me and said, "That time of the month, eh?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 739

You deserved it 27 156

Today, after spotting my ex-boyfriend's truck in a desolate parking lot, I decided to "decorate" the muddy side of it with a rather large male appendage. After checking around me to make sure there were no witnesses, I got to work. I probably should have made sure he wasn't sitting in the truck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 280

You deserved it 49 810

The Top

Today, my daughter threw my stepson down the stairs. When I asked what the hell was going on, she claimed she was just demonstrating her willingness to seriously injure him the next time she catches him in her underwear drawer or in her room at all. I’m not sure which direction to parent in here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 471

You deserved it 158

Today, after losing twenty pounds to please my husband, the only comment I received was, "At least now only your personality sucks." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 920

You deserved it 5 094

Today, I was at a party. The girl I'm madly in love with referred to me as her 'Gay Friend.' She refused to kiss me in Spin-the-Bottle as 'She didn't want to do anything with anyone that night'. She then made out, and slept with, my 'best friend' whom she had never met before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 419

You deserved it 6 706

Today, I was playing guitar at a party, and girls were into me. I'm alright at guitar but by no means an expert. Some kid who was practically a wizard took a turn playing. He could play almost any song on the fly. He made me look so bad that I've never had so many girls in one room be embarrassed to have talked to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 502

You deserved it 191

Today, I had to rush my 14-year-old son to the hospital after he fell out of a tree while trying to take an obnoxious "extreme selfie". FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 094

You deserved it 5 927

Today, I found out my mom intentionally puts extra butter and oil in the food she cooks for me because she wants me to be fatter than her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 414

You deserved it 3 787