Animals: Today, I was having a horrible day. I was laying on the couch,...

By BadBreath - 09/04/2009 03:43 - United States

Today, I was having a horrible day. I was laying on the couch, crying, when my dog came up on the couch to console me. I was thinking about how great it was to have a dog, because they're there for you when no one else is. As I was sobbing, I heard something. My dog farted into my mouth. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 670

You deserved it 9 391

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Same thing different taste

By FrozenAnonymus - 14/07/2016 18:05 - Czech Republic - Prague

Today, I was laying on a couch with my dog watching TV when I heard my dog fart. I looked at her, she looked at me and started waving her tail, blowing it into my direction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 851

You deserved it 1 520

By Noname - 02/02/2009 04:31 - United States

Today, I was looking after my parents house and their wiener dog, and fell asleep on the couch. The dog climbed onto my shoulders and rested behind my head like a doggie neck pillow. All was great until she farted right in my left ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 810

You deserved it 7 058

Blame the pooch

By anamota89 - 11/05/2012 09:33 - United States

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. I had to fart really badly, so thinking that he wouldn't hear me, I did so. He heard me and asked, "Did you fart?" I said "No, it was my dog." I don't have a dog, and he knows this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 336

You deserved it 32 285

By aaalias34 - 26/02/2010 11:13 - United States

Today, my dog farted. Immediately, he turned around to sniff his stink then furiously licked his butthole. He then licked my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 985

You deserved it 8 455

By frenchpop1960 - 23/02/2009 21:58 - United States

Today, I was over at my boyfriend's house and I heard a strange sound. I laughed and said, "It sounds like a dog throwing up!" He listened for a second and said "That's my mom crying downstairs." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 370

You deserved it 41 843

By Keyser Soze - 17/01/2017 09:56

Today, I was cleaning out the cabinets under my kitchen sink and I farted with such force that my dog thought someone was knocking at the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 646

You deserved it 1 021

Vicious dog

By onefmlafteranother - 15/11/2019 01:00

Today, I was laying my head on my dad's dog when he walked in. I jokingly asked my dad, "I'm cuddling with your dog, are you jealous?" At that moment, the dog lets a massive, earth-quaking fart and my dad promptly responded, "Nope!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 681

You deserved it 581

Thanks for the support

By Anonymous - 01/03/2024 15:00 - United States - Dallas

Today, I came home very tired from a bad day at work, and really just wanted to relax on the couch for a while. My cat jumped into my lap, wanting affection. I was petting him, thanking him for his emotional support. He reciprocated by noxiously farting in my face and running away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 425

You deserved it 142

Alarm

By Anonymous - 09/08/2012 14:26 - United States

Today, my dog farted so loud in his sleep that he scared himself and woke up barking. This afternoon I achieved the same feat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 583

You deserved it 4 008

By Swabidizop - 18/05/2015 20:40 - United States - Greeley

Today, I had the most rancid fart. My dog woke up from his nap and bit me as punishment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 042

You deserved it 8 048

Jaxro 6

Thursday 9 April 2009 12:13

And why was your dog's ass in your face? You would think it would be facing you, maybe licking your face.

Kimienxtc 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 12:13

Awww Your dog loves you! :)

Comments

duchesse427 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 4:50

lol, i'm sorry but that was hilarious. and like someone else said, at least he got you to think about something else

BEB131 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 6:21

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHA

abu3mair 0

Sunday 12 April 2009 23:42

hahahahahaha... HILARIOUS! usually the stories are stupid but this one is awesome. turns out your dog didnt want to console you, he wanted a litter box.

conorlawlz 0

Monday 13 April 2009 10:07

Lmao at the thought of you thinking your dog loves you when it has its asshole in your face.

Kiwiwi_fml 0

Monday 13 April 2009 17:18

YDI for letting the dog lay with you... with his ass in your face. o.o

utinaeniduin 0

Tuesday 14 April 2009 18:12

this is such bullshit. if you had his ass in your face i'm sure that a fart wouldn't be that surprising to you. fml lies are unimpressive.

amazingapril 0

Wednesday 15 April 2009 0:18

hahahahahhaha (: that is the funniest thing ive ever heard/

ichigolyn 6

Thursday 16 April 2009 2:59

Awww... kinda sad, but I LOLed..

egypt_fml 0

Monday 11 May 2009 8:50

Wait, lmfao.. but why was the dog's butt by your face? I'm guessing you were laying on the couch and the dog was either just sitting by your face or laying down next to you, his head facing your feet and his butt facing your head, lol. This FML is cute in a weird.. way. Just the dog consoling part, not the fart.