Kids: Today, I was babysitting. The kid said he had to use the bathroom....

By Anonymous - 11/02/2010 13:33 - United States

Today, I was babysitting. The kid said he had to use the bathroom. When I told him to go ahead, he said he just did. He was on my lap. He wasn't wearing pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 517

You deserved it 7 912

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Same thing different taste

By Bob - 20/06/2009 04:22 - United States

Today, while teaching at a daycare, a child came up to me and asked if he could go to the bathroom. Obviously, I said it was fine. He then pulled his pants down, and pee on my brand new shoes, and all over my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 065

You deserved it 4 728

Plug it

By Dumbblonde - 03/05/2009 15:15 - United States

Today, I was babysitting a little girl. She told me she wanted to go to the park, so we did. As we were walking back, I was carrying her on my back. When we were almost at the front door, she told me she had to pee. I told her to hold it in for a second. As we were walking through the door, I felt a warm spot on my back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 566

You deserved it 16 903

By sdasdflkjas - 30/05/2009 04:24 - United States

Today, while the kid I was babysitting was in the bathroom, he called to me "I need some help in here." Worried I ran to the bathroom and asked him what was wrong. He needed me to wipe his butt. As if that weren't gross enough, just as my hand was under his butt, he pooped again and laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 132

You deserved it 6 357

Chub rub

By Anonymous - 19/03/2021 13:59 - United States - Malvern

Today, I was pooping in a public toilet and a kid had walked in on me. I then heard him tell his dad, "It's okay, I didn't see anything, he was fat so his chubby legs hid it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 892

You deserved it 187

By Anonymous - 27/02/2010 06:36 - United States

Today, I was babysitting to make a few extra dollars. While changing one of the kid's diapers, I turned around to find the other kid gone. I turned back around frantically, only to get poop flung at my face. I guess I found him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 594

You deserved it 3 172

By thesitter - 10/05/2009 13:18 - United States

Today, while babysitting, I gave the boy a pen and paper because he wanted to draw me. When he was done, he let me see but then said, "Wait! I'm not done." He took it back and basically colored in the arms. I said, "I'm not wearing long-sleeves." He said, "That's hair." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 328

You deserved it 8 162

By Anonymous - 17/07/2013 01:55 - United States - Port Orchard

Today, I discovered that my 8-year old is not fully toilet trained when a turd fell out of his pants, shortly after introducing him to his new babysitter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 556

You deserved it 9 319

Surprise!

By ilana - 10/02/2012 09:51 - United States

Today, I was working at my day-camp, and one of my little boys told me he had to show me something important. He proudly showed me that he'd crapped his pants. I had to wipe his ass clean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 422

You deserved it 3 346

Sticky

By Aunjy - 05/05/2013 20:49 - United States - Marmora

Today, I babysat a 4-year-old child for my neighbor. It seems he had diarrhea. The evidence of this is in his pants, down his leg, on the couch, on the bathroom floor, smeared on my wall, and in the shape of a brown handprint on my shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 563

You deserved it 4 279

By Monroe - 23/06/2011 22:30 - United States

Today, I was babysitting my cousin when I realized my aunt didn't tell me where the diapers were. I searched the entire house, but I had no luck. Then my cousin ripped off the diaper she was wearing and peed on the kitchen floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 326

You deserved it 4 244

kel_pie 1

Thursday 11 February 2010 20:06

why would be holding a kid that had no pants on ...

imperfectclarity 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 20:06

Why was he sitting on your lap without pants?? Ew.

Comments

trumpetGIRL12345 0

Friday 12 March 2010 4:33

PANTS ON THE GROUND!!! ha ha ROFLMAO

trumpetGIRL12345 0

Friday 12 March 2010 4:35

#75 sweet picture r u in band ? r u a band geek? I am!!

FateIsAgainstMe 0

Sunday 14 March 2010 21:59

Life Lesson 79: When babysitting, don't let the children sit on your lap, while they are naked.

glambert1998 0

Wednesday 15 September 2010 3:48

he might of had his first errection in ur lap possibly

NotInAGoodWay 0

Thursday 4 November 2010 1:54

wait, you were babysitting a little boy... and he was sitting on your lap????!!!! with NO pants????? Wtf???

varkey 7

Friday 11 March 2011 6:35

ok, why wasn't he wearing pants...

AnimeGirl0071 1

Monday 14 March 2011 4:33

Were you to busy thrusting to notice the pee? Oh my xD

thatyngboyryan 1

Saturday 23 April 2011 14:04

bet you where pissed off oh wait you where pissed on lol

gabby1995pena 4

Sunday 12 June 2011 14:00

why were you holding a pantsless child? are you a catholic priest??

chelseaaababyyy 17

Tuesday 14 June 2011 6:00

no pants ? welll thats weird..

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Today, I accidentally posted an extensive, negative review of the gynecologist I visited earlier this week. I messed up and posted it from my work's customer service email, so now it looks like the large, well-known company I work for had a poor gynecological experience. FML

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Today, instead of thinking he should try to get a higher-paying job (like I did) my husband decided to come up with some money saving ideas. Almost all of them include being unhygienic, such as weekly showers, wiping dishes, and only washing clothes after 5 or more wears. I want a divorce. FML

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You deserved it 152

Today, I was sitting on the bus next to a hot guy who was texting. I sneaked a peek at his phone to see if he was texting a girl so I could know if he was single. As I looked at his screen, he turned it towards me and typed in caps "STOP BEING A CREEPER." He got out of his seat and off the bus. FML

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Today, I was having breakfast when my mom's boyfriend came and sat right across from me. He didn't try and hide the fact that he was staring at my chest and told me, "Wow, you're getting bigger." I glared at him. He winked at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 497

You deserved it 4 072

Today, I received an email from my stepmom. It was a picture of a boy that she said she thought I might like to know. Next to the picture was the message, "He comes from a good military background." My love life is so pathetic that my stepmother feels the need to try and set me up. FML

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You deserved it 4 931

Today, I asked my parents if I had a college fund because I will be going to university in two years. They laughed. FML

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Today, I drove a drunk Venezuelan exchange student home after a prom party. Notable events: her puking on the way to the vehicle, her yelling in Spanish at the top of her lungs in the car, her puking out the window in the moving vehicle, and her crying because she felt bad for making me drive. FML

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You deserved it 4 932