Miscellaneous: Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family.... - FML

By gbhlaughingstock - 18/08/2009 19:20 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family. My brother shook up my mom's soda, as a prank. My entire class witnessed my mom waving around an overflowing Diet Coke while my dad yelled, "Come on, put your mouth on it! Suck it! Suck it, Kathy!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 128 225

You deserved it 9 748

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Same thing different taste

By Weedle - 04/06/2019 20:00

Today, I was at my brother's graduation. His mom was taking pictures of him in his cap and gown, but she got a picture of me sucking off a Coke bottle for a laugh, and she posted it on Facebook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 821

You deserved it 1 877

By Simon - 30/12/2008 11:14 - France

Today, as a prank I shook my girlfriend's can of soda. I hadn't noticed that it was already open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 132

You deserved it 53 517

It's just a prank, bro!

By HOPE YOU GET PEGGED - 21/10/2012 23:00 - Canada - Hinton

Today, my mom hosted a high-school reunion. I had to prepare dessert, while my brother cooked dinner. Being the absolute dickhead that he is, he switched the sugar with salt. All the desserts I made tasted like shit, everyone left, and I got grounded for my supposed prank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 571

You deserved it 2 416

Life and soul of the party

By Anonymous - 01/01/2016 10:08 - United States - San Antonio

Today, during a party, my drunk mother stumbled over to take a picture of me and my brother. She told me to put a party blower in my mouth for the picture, but I politely declined. She threatened to spank me in front of everyone if I didn't do it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 625

You deserved it 2 283

Misunderstanding

By Anonymous - 24/04/2013 18:49 - United States - Rice Lake

Today, my husband tried to annoy me by slurping on his almost-finished drink. I yelled at him to knock it off. Later, our daughter told her class that mommy and daddy had been fighting about his drinking during breakfast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 496

You deserved it 6 559

By Anonymous - 27/01/2017 02:00

Today, I saw my little brother drink from the milk carton, gag, and spit the milk back in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 263

You deserved it 476

Backfire

By Anonymous - 14/07/2012 20:10 - Nigeria - Lagos

Today, my dad was making coffee for the family. Half-way through, he excused himself to the bathroom, so for a laugh, I discreetly poured a load of salt into his drink. When he served us, I drank a mouthful and doubled over hacking. My dad barked, "I wasn't born yesterday, son." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 173

You deserved it 54 738

By Nick - 13/08/2009 19:47 - United States

Today, I was looking in the refrigerator for something to drink. I found a jug of lemonade with a piece of paper on it saying "Mom's Lemonade, Don't Drink!" I was really thirsty, so I ignored it and drank the whole jug. My mom is about to have a colonoscopy and had filled it with laxatives. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 404

You deserved it 147 087

When feral kids attack

By GracieGirl - 04/10/2019 06:00

Today, while waiting for my name to be called at the doctor's office, a little boy threw a Dixie cup full of water at me, making it look like I wet my pants. His mom just laughed and dragged him off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 629

You deserved it 109

Double entendre

By mel - 11/05/2012 21:23 - United Kingdom - Bournemouth

Spicy

Today, while in the break room at work, I laughed at a co-worker's joke and started choking on my drink. My boss exclaimed in front of everyone, "We need to teach this girl how to swallow!" to everyone's childish amusement. Now they won't stop calling me Spit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 003

You deserved it 3 155

Next

Top comments

sawdy 0

Wednesday 19 August 2009 2:01

your dad is a BBEAST!!!!!!!!!

shaniqualee 2

Wednesday 19 August 2009 2:00

Suck the foam off

Comments

omgpotato 5

Sunday 27 March 2011 5:22

That sounds so wrong! XD I would have told my dad to shut it

hatorimitsume 0

Wednesday 30 March 2011 1:42

I can't stop laughing

AlejandroGonzale 0

Monday 11 April 2011 4:40

y is this an FML? If that happened to me it'd be sooooooo funny. I'd laugh about it and play it up at school.

Mz_Kane 0

Saturday 23 April 2011 18:07

Hahaha Lmfao....

silverstar210 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 1:27

umm...eww much? lol bet ur known as s*x child. lol I dunno random but still FYL

fuzz94 8

Sunday 8 May 2011 16:56

epic

DalekScythe 0

Friday 17 June 2011 21:31

OH GOD THATS! THAT'S ******* HALRIOUS! YOU'RE DAD IS ******* BEAST!

ekachilles99 2

Monday 18 July 2011 6:28

ur family is awesome

Flamindemon 2

Tuesday 9 August 2011 10:50

You got a spaggeti lunch dinner? Shit man i got nothing

thekewlest69 9

Saturday 27 August 2011 8:54

Winning

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The Top

Today, I had to call a customer. I usually try to avoid calling customers because I have a very prominent speech impediment. Well, it turns out the customer I called also has a speech impediment and thought I was mocking her. She hung up on me and filed a formal complaint with my company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 803

You deserved it 624

Today, I was on the bus home and on the phone with my best friend discussing my sex life with this new guy I'm seeing. I was telling her all sorts of raunchy sex things we've done until someone taps my shoulder and says "I'm sure he doesn't appreciate you saying this in public." It was his mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 355

You deserved it 107 039

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 4 307

You deserved it 755

Today, out of spite, I wrote "Ms. Piggy" instead of my professor's actual name in the heading of my essay. Guess what I forgot to do before turning it in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 960

You deserved it 5 094

Today, I found out that even though my boyfriend thinks that peeing on me in the shower is acceptable, he will still freak out and call me disgusting if I try to use the toilet while he's taking a shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 335

You deserved it 6 537

Today, my girlfriend and I were up late watching TV when an infomercial for "Male enhancement" came on. As I grabbed my phone, my girlfriend said, "Oh honey, don't buy that, it's okay that you're small." I was checking my voicemails. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 639

You deserved it 6 370

Today, I was sick, so I went into work to see if I could get my shift covered, instead of just calling in. I ended up working an extra hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 601

You deserved it 3 365

Today, having been on hold on the phone for several minutes, I felt the need to release a fart. Just as I started my release, they picked up. They definitely heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 721

You deserved it 235