Love: Today, I was at a swim meet. I asked my friend if he could be... - FML

By look before you speak - 09/02/2014 07:12 - United States

Today, I was at a swim meet. I asked my friend if he could be my wingman and help me get a date with a girl I really liked. I told him my plan, and as I finished and turned to go to her, I noticed her standing right there, listening in on the whole conversation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 618

You deserved it 13 818

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Same thing different taste

By KeepOnTruckin' - 18/05/2019 17:50

Today, I had to help my best friend plan his upcoming date with the girl he doesn't know I'm secretly in love with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 904

You deserved it 559

By Aaron - 09/12/2012 23:34 - United States - Matthews

Today, I decided to talk to a girl at the gym I had seen there a lot. I walked up to her at the station she was at and asked her out to dinner sometime. I didn't realize she had been wearing headphones. She took them off and asked if I was waiting on the station. My courage left. I said yes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 694

You deserved it 4 904

In the zone

By Anonymous - 12/09/2019 20:05

Today, I was flirting with a girl I like when she confessed she was into another guy. I then proceeded to wingman for that guy, telling her to take her shot with him before the chance went away. Effectively sticking myself into the friendzone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 771

You deserved it 1 669

By newmoongirl1036 - 13/07/2015 02:03 - United States - Chicago

Today, I went on a date with a guy that I really like. At the last minute he informed me a friend would be tagging along. To keep his friend from being a third-wheel, I kept up a conversation, and managed to piss my date off. He thought I would be a better match for his friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 962

You deserved it 3 356

"Friend"

By BarCrush - 22/02/2018 19:00

Today, and for the past two months, I've been going to the bar with my friends quite regularly because I have a massive crush on the cute bartender. Being quite shy, I asked my friend if he could be my wingman so I could finally talk to her properly. He took her home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 797

You deserved it 976

By Anonymous - 03/12/2010 21:18 - Argentina

Today, a guy I've liked for a while asked if he could talk to me during break. He'd never done that before, so I was excited and said yes. As soon as we both sat down, he asked if I'd help him get a date with my best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 588

You deserved it 3 294

Baywatch

By Anonymous - 02/10/2017 19:30 - United States - Stony Brook

Today, I went to the university pool. There was this cute lifeguard there, and every time I got out of the water I saw her looking at me, so I walked up to her and asked if everything was OK. She told me she thought I was going to drown. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 344

You deserved it 488

By spaghett - 29/08/2016 20:32 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, after jumping into a public swimming pool, the female lifeguard, who I have had a crush on for years whistled at me. When I got out of the water, she handed me the bathing suit I'd apparently lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 153

You deserved it 1 812

Denied

By uglyswimmer - 23/04/2009 01:58 - United States

Today, I was talking to a swimmer I just met. I saw a cute guy and whispered to her, "That guy is hot." She asked "Who?" I pointed at him. She turned to see him, then turned back to me and said "Ew, that's my brother." She went to him, whispered something. He turned around to see me and said, "EW." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 645

You deserved it 7 747

By babydoll13211 - 04/09/2009 21:36 - United States

Today, I was at a friend's pool party. He lives on a lake and one of our friends wouldn't get in the water. My best friend and I decided to push him off the dock. Once we had, I turned to see my crush who had watched looked shocked, then said, "You know he can't swim right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 318

You deserved it 66 291

Next

Top comments

mea_iloveskiing 26

Sunday 9 February 2014 16:10

Now I wonder what her reaction was.

killuhand 12

Sunday 9 February 2014 16:10

thats one way to do it i guess

Comments

organicsam 0

Tuesday 11 February 2014 17:24

So are you going out now?

chickenman12312 12

Thursday 13 February 2014 3:38

What did she say?

ARandomNinja 3

Thursday 13 February 2014 16:47

I hope she said yes

likemice 6

Thursday 13 February 2014 21:41

Well what happened then?!

abowma 6

Monday 17 February 2014 0:08

Lol

Overexuberent 2

Saturday 22 February 2014 9:24

.... But did it work?

philm 2

Wednesday 5 March 2014 4:17

Can't leave us hanging, what'd she say

TallMist 32

Friday 18 April 2014 19:26

Where is the follow up, OP?!

leahpoling 8

Saturday 16 August 2014 6:50

That saved both you and your friend time

copenhagencb82 19

Saturday 20 June 2015 18:25

I sure hope she said yes..

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, I had a softball team dinner, and I was sitting with a bunch of girls who were talking about how far they've gone with guys. One girl goes, "I must be the least experienced one here, I've never even kissed a guy!" Surprised, I said, "Me too!" and high-fived her. She was joking. I wasn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 562

You deserved it 9 847

Today, I woke up late. My grandparents had slept over the night before, but they usually leave early. I heard someone in the kitchen and, thinking it was my brother, I said, "Thank god, the geriatric crew is FINALLY gone." My grandma then responded, "No, we're not." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 496

You deserved it 74 251

The Top

Today, I went to Seattle with my mom to visit my pregnant sister, only to end up being dragged to a store to buy maternity clothes. The saleswoman apologized to me repeatedly for not having a lounge for the fathers, but congratulated me on the baby. I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 043

You deserved it 5 217

Today, my dandruff got so bad that when I sneezed on the bus, it created a "blizzard" of dandruff, covering me, and two others in it. I'm now known as "Winter Wonderland". FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 332

You deserved it 2 903

Today, I learned that bees like to get out of the hot sun, too. And that they do this by crawling into people's bed sheets. I also learned that these bees don't like it when you go to lay down in your own bed. They don't like it at all. Now it hurts to put weight on my right butt cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 775

You deserved it 333

Today, my husband nearly set our apartment on fire, all because he attempted to burn any evidence of his affair with his mistress, including the used latex condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 688

You deserved it 140

Today, I found out that our neighbors told almost everyone on our street that I was mentally handicapped. All this time I wasn't sure why they would speak slowly and loudly at me. Now they won't believe me when I tell them I'm a 4.0 GPA student. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 617

You deserved it 3 585

Today, my landlord told me he is raising my rent next month. I thought he was kidding until he asked if I still wanted to live here. My landlord is also my live-in boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 161

You deserved it 3 958