Miscellaneous: Today, I tried to inconspicuously hock a loogie. It went down...

By Courtney - 04/02/2012 20:22 - Reserved

Today, I tried to inconspicuously hock a loogie. It went down my bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 462

You deserved it 34 677

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Same thing different taste

By pantyripper - 24/03/2014 12:39 - Australia - Essendon

Today, I ripped my old, worn underwear while trying to pick a wedgie in public. Half ended up in my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 303

You deserved it 21 652

By Anonymous - 22/09/2011 13:55 - Australia

Today, I was expecting my period. To avoid the embarrassment of everyone in the office finding out, instead of putting tampons in my bag, I hid one in my bra. It fell out while I was coming back from lunch. I am now known to all as "The Tampon Dispenser". FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 944

You deserved it 34 020

By no no no no no no no no no no no fuck no - 01/09/2013 20:04 - Greece - Athens

Today, I witnessed my husband hocking a loogie into his hand, then throwing it into the trash can and continuing to make our sandwiches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 291

You deserved it 3 224

Snap!

By fryebaby623 - 13/11/2015 05:47 - United States - Vero Beach

Today, I was so tired when I got home from work, I took off my bra without removing my shirt which I've done so often it is second nature. I successfully removed the bra, then snagged the clasp on a loose shirt thread, causing my bra to take on a life of its own and slap me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 274

You deserved it 3 217

Pick me!

By Anonymous - 13/05/2021 17:01

Today, I wore my tightest, slightly too small, push-up bra and low cut top to impress a guy at work. He came over to borrow a pen. I leaned down to get one out of my bag and my nipple popped out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 272

You deserved it 1 933

By Anonymous - 07/11/2015 05:02 - Canada - Barrie

Today, my 9 year old shitblossom of a sister decided to wake me up by hocking a loogie into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 755

You deserved it 1 841

By Anonymous - 10/02/2011 20:06 - United States

Today, I was on the phone with a client, when the gum I was casually chewing fell out of my mouth and down my shirt. While I was trying to dig it out, two of our newest customers walked into the lobby to see what looked like me fondling my breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 359

You deserved it 12 707

Malfunctioning equipment

By Alyxandrea Loffer - 24/09/2020 01:02 - United States - Ellsworth

Today, at work, my front-close bra popped open like an anime character, right in front of the two male coworkers I was talking to. My boobs flung around and I had to pretend nothing happened while subtly crossing my arms and waiting for them to leave so I could fix it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 552

You deserved it 279

By Kurda - 23/05/2015 02:26 - United States - Wallburg

Today, I finally found a bug I had been trying to get rid of. When I removed my bra, I noticed what looked like a piece of bug on it. Apparently, the bug was flattened and suffocated by my boob the entire day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 518

You deserved it 2 764

By Itsbeen8years - 05/04/2015 19:18 - Slovakia - Stupava

Today, I found my first bra and tried it on. It still fits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 951

You deserved it 3 866

jasony0423 0

Sunday 5 February 2012 1:18

You're a classy woman, aren't ya?

IIRoxieII 12

Sunday 5 February 2012 1:15

Saving it for later?

Comments

kei1108 13

Sunday 5 February 2012 8:05

That's disgusting and immature. Get a freakin' tissue and never do that again. YDI

coldashell 23

Sunday 5 February 2012 8:37

We're your nipples really that dry?

bro1oke 0

Sunday 5 February 2012 8:56

... DERP

red1355 6

Sunday 5 February 2012 9:07

So im guessing your not a spitter, your a swallower? Lol

workoutfreak 4

Sunday 5 February 2012 9:10

Do you know how speak some English? or do u just translate it all?

MourningLight 2

Sunday 5 February 2012 9:40

mulan over here...

SheepShoop_fml 20

Sunday 5 February 2012 10:52

Beautiful. Bend over a little next time. It helps.

Clamcreepy 7

Sunday 5 February 2012 11:05

Eww very unladylike..I hope no creep(lol) seen you thinking you were doing your own private wet t-shirt contest

dorkasaurusROAR 7

Sunday 5 February 2012 11:07

You must have huge **** if that could happen.

smrtass81 3

Sunday 5 February 2012 11:17

Maybe you should swallow

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The Top

Today, I was driving to visit my parents for the first time in two years. After spending about $4000 to make sure my car wouldn't break down on the journey, around the halfway point, the front tire popped and the engine blew out. I'm about 5 states away from both my parents and my home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 732

You deserved it 490

Today, my husband and I were role playing to keep our marriage alive. His character was a deranged stalker while I was the helpless girl. My neighbor thought I was really being chased so she called the cops. Once they came we explained the whole story and got a fine for disturbing the peace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 853

You deserved it 7 893

The Top

Today, while rushing to a big marketing presentation, I started feeling ill in my car. I was stuck in traffic, and before I could get my window open I threw up all over my suit. All I had were some tissues to try to clean the mess before presenting to a full boardroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 586

You deserved it 323

Today, I embarrassed myself not once, not twice, but three times in front of a coworker. I dropped something, they came to help; I got distracted and fell forward onto my knees, to only then nearly knock over an entire skid of boxes on to the both of us. I kinda want to quit my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 622

You deserved it 160

Today, during the worst flu we've ever had, my wife and I have to go out into thirty-below weather to get firewood because the furnace broke down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 390

You deserved it 461

Today, I was napping when my little brother cut off huge chunks of my hair. He thought it would turn me into the older brother he always wanted. He's 8. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 988

You deserved it 2 106

Today, I got into a heated argument with my girlfriend. Not because of anything I did, but because she actually believes that pasteurization is when a pastor blesses a dairy product. "You know, like kosher." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 812

You deserved it 2 918

Today, our family went out to a restaurant at night. My cousin and I needed to go to the restroom, so we told everyone before going. Less than three minutes later, we came out to find them gone, along with the cars. They forgot about their own kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 893

You deserved it 2 454

Same thing different taste

Snap!

Pick me!

Malfunctioning equipment

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