Miscellaneous: Today, I realized I bought 30 condoms last year. I now have 29....

By fuckit - 31/01/2009 17:24 - United States

Today, I realized I bought 30 condoms last year. I now have 29. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 233

You deserved it 5 606

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
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Same thing different taste

By DosSantos - 03/08/2017 00:30

Today, I returned from a trip to Budapest with more condoms than I had brought with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 465

You deserved it 938

By Confused lesbian - 16/07/2018 13:30 - United States - Lynchburg

Today, I found a used condom in my bed. I haven't had sex in months and now I'm terrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 481

You deserved it 293

By totallyembarassed - 07/07/2012 04:08 - United States - Charlotte

Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 993

You deserved it 28 756

By nottoosmall - 03/04/2013 16:57 - United States

Today, I was buying condoms at Walmart. I grabbed the XL size, and the cashier commented, "Ahh, you'll definitely need a smaller size." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 765

You deserved it 15 609

By Anonymous - 09/06/2013 14:29 - United States - Greenwood

Today, I went to the local pharmacy to buy some condoms. When I went to go purchase them, the elderly lady behind the counter took one look at me and said, "Honey, you're your own birth control." FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 540

You deserved it 10 545

By useless pos - 01/03/2013 00:48 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I went out to buy a bottle of wine and some condoms. As the cashier scanned the condoms, she snickered and muttered, "Yeah right." She was right; I really was just desperate to look like I have a sex life. I got so upset that I left my items and walked out with tears in my eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 274

You deserved it 12 351

By Roomie pay rent plz - 24/04/2016 01:25 - United States - Hicksville

Today, my roommate's shopping addiction reached a whole new level. He bought a box of tampons just because they were 40% off. Yes, he. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 426

You deserved it 1 313

Memory loss

By UGH - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had to return a shirt to Target. My mom offered to do it for me on her way to work, so I gave her the shirt and receipt. Later, I remembered that on the same receipt I had purchased condoms, lube, and whipped cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 274

You deserved it 81 061

By peridot1aa - 24/10/2018 03:00

Today, I was cleaning out my room and picked up my bed and found a condom. I'm 15 and still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 609

You deserved it 221

By Anonymous - 16/11/2009 00:52 - Canada

Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 104

You deserved it 4 186

alwaysalady 0

Thursday 12 February 2009 20:13

When I got married, my husband's best friend gave him a package of condoms at his bachelor party. little did we know he had carefully opened the box and stuck a tiny needle though all of them and then glued the box shut again. Nine months later....

ipod_fml 0

Saturday 30 April 2011 13:33

you should post this as FML...

Comments

bexx1996 0

Tuesday 15 March 2011 1:30

i second this!

What_Willis_is_t 1

Friday 22 April 2011 3:32

At least your hand appreciated the protection.

invicta8926 0

Friday 29 April 2011 6:40

Get outta here and get a girlfriend!

xMRxLAMAx 0

Monday 2 May 2011 18:10

So?

fmlizdabest 0

Monday 16 May 2011 5:43

i third :)

mnohoe 9

Sunday 5 June 2011 14:34

I bet the one that was missing was only a test run to see if he got the right size. The things we will never know still remain a mystery. Hmmm. bum bum bum.