Love: Today, I heard vibrating from inside my husband's desk drawer....

By Anonymous - 04/12/2011 23:52 - United States

Today, I heard vibrating from inside my husband's desk drawer. Since he's away for the weekend, I investigated. I found an unfamiliar cellphone with an inbound call. I answered it. Turns out, it was his mistress. Neither of us can get a hold of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 139

You deserved it 3 436

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
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Same thing different taste

By badwife - 07/11/2009 10:22 - Japan

Today, my husband left his phone at home. I looked through his contacts and found a person named "The Bitch." Being very curious, I called "The Bitch" to see who it was. My phone rang. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 378

You deserved it 17 354

By Katie - 09/10/2012 05:42 - United States - Homewood

Today, I received frantic calls and messages from my husband wondering where I was and if I was cheating on him. I was in the same house as him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 195

You deserved it 2 096

By scumbag - 05/11/2009 10:12 - United States

Today, I got a call from the guy I have been seeing. I wasn't him. It was his wife wondering why I have her husband's number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 127

You deserved it 6 424

By MyLife - 06/02/2013 08:04

Today, my husband decided to start seeing other people. I found out when I called and interrupted his date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 549

You deserved it 2 629

By Whoops - 28/01/2010 20:21 - France

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a make-out session in the backseat of his car, when we heard a voice coming from his pants. Who did he pocket dial? My house. At midnight, when I was supposed to be home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 462

You deserved it 36 459

By Soontobeex - 15/09/2009 21:44 - United States

Today, I decided to go through my husband's phone to make sure I invited everyone to the surprise party I was planning for him. There were a few I had missed so I called to let them know about it. The last number I called was his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 578

You deserved it 4 674

Freakout

By Anonymous - 04/01/2012 17:00 - United States

Today, when I woke up I checked my phone for messages, only to hear a woman screaming that I have been sleeping with her husband and that she is sending her 'people' after me. I have never met said husband. I panicked for hours only to receive a call telling me she had dialed the wrong number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 208

You deserved it 2 832

By Anonymous - 19/09/2010 14:12 - United States

Today, I found out that my husband keeps in contact with the woman he was infatuated with in high school. He texts her more than he texts me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 443

You deserved it 4 211

By Anonymous - 28/09/2013 04:08 - United States - Bloomdale

Today, my husband and I switched phones by accident. I've already received several naked pictures from one of his co-workers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 759

You deserved it 4 403

There's no such thing as a coincidence

By Anonymous - 15/10/2022 18:00

Today, I ran into my husband and his mistress. He was picking her up at the airport. I was catching a flight to a conference with my boss. He had flowers for her, and his arm around her. My boss knows my husband as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 038

You deserved it 91

hbcbmx 5

Monday 5 December 2011 2:13

Change the locks while hes gone ;)

geod69 8

Monday 5 December 2011 2:14

Probably with his other mistress

Comments

brandoneyez1 25

Monday 5 December 2011 12:55

I wonder if he left both of you for another woman. In either case I'll keep my eyes in the news for another Loraina Bobbit story... Lol

Commiecakes 0

Monday 5 December 2011 12:57

I saw the word vibrator and expected a completely different outcome.

marisadc79 0

Monday 5 December 2011 13:00

Oh man, call the mistress back and tell her off then pack his shit and change the locks

Timja83 0

Monday 5 December 2011 13:26

Keep the phone as evidence when you go to divorce court over alimony...

Jasonf6 0

Monday 5 December 2011 13:59

Get rid of that loser.

thecovert 7

Monday 5 December 2011 16:17

Dump him.

kyrintethron 0

Monday 5 December 2011 16:47

He's probably dead.

na415 0

Monday 5 December 2011 16:58

more like FOL?

deadlife_fml 0

Monday 5 December 2011 19:50

Looks like its time for Maury

gabletz 2

Monday 5 December 2011 22:44

Ooo. Ouch! Fyl OP.

Keywords

Love Video games Gamers Health Gross Weird Smells First Dates Parents Technology Kids Annoying Jealousy Animals Dogs AITA Pranks Dreams Family Geek Relatable Gun control Money Amazon Birthday Cute Awkward Abuse Social Media Scams

The Top

Today, I was having sexy time with my girlfriend when she said she needed to pee. She came back 5 minutes later and started talking about how she hasn't seen her best friend in ages and misses her. Needless to say, I couldn't get the man downstairs back up when we continued. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 077

You deserved it 186

Today, after taking my girlfriend on a date, she invited me back to her place for "hot coffee and dessert." Excitedly, I said yes. When we got there, we actually had coffee and dessert. When I told her this wasn't what I'd had in mind, she kicked me out for being a pervert. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 154

You deserved it 68 071

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You deserved it 10 681

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I agree, your life sucks 209

You deserved it 636

Today, I'm a 27-year-old back-to-school university student. Everyone hates me because I'm actually interested in participating in my classes and getting good grades, instead of partying, cheating in exams, and generally not giving a crap. Apparently I make them look bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 207

You deserved it 2 353

Today, a woman attempted to pickpocket me while trying to educate me about God. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 372

You deserved it 4 304

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I agree, your life sucks 27 313

You deserved it 2 666

Today, I went to the mall with some friends. We all kept smelling this god awful B.O. smell and had no idea where it was coming from. On the car ride home, we all figured out it was actually me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 409

You deserved it 12 097

Same thing different taste

Freakout

There's no such thing as a coincidence

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