Intimacy: Today, I handed the keys to my Mustang to my mom so she could...

By jackass - 13/04/2009 10:46 - United States

Today, I handed the keys to my Mustang to my mom so she could go car shopping. As she pulled away, I remembered the condom wrappers, sex toy packaging, and empty bottle of rum that was in the passenger's seat of my car. I'm twenty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 852

You deserved it 82 701

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Same thing different taste

The talk

By Anonymous - 12/10/2009 01:28 - United States

Today, my mother had "The talk" with me about sex. I spent the entire time confused as to what brought this up, until she mentioned she had found a used condom in the backseat of the car. I haven't had any action in it, and have no idea whose it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 331

You deserved it 2 278

Awkward

By Anonymous - 07/01/2012 06:30 - United States

Today, I found out what it's like to have your boyfriend's mom find your hidden stash of condoms in your car, then spend the next two hours shopping with her. Alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 583

You deserved it 7 221

And then.....

By Emmpag - 02/02/2020 01:00 - South Africa - Johannesburg

Today, I bought my very first car that I spent years saving for. A few hours after I signed all the papers, I let my boyfriend go for a test drive. He totaled it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 279

You deserved it 796

By Username - 06/06/2011 03:29 - United States

Today, I just bought a car with all of my own money. Then, when I brought it home my dad informed me that my mom will be driving it to work every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 698

You deserved it 4 107

By Anonymous - 14/04/2012 04:57 - United States - Paducah

Today, it was my 16th birthday. My surprise was a new car, that is now in the side of the garage because my mom lost control while driving it around front. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 022

You deserved it 4 324

By Anonymous - 11/03/2010 23:00 - United States

Today, while cleaning my car, I found my mother's underwear in the backseat. She'd borrowed my car last weekend because hers had been in the shop and she'd been called in to work. I see she put in for overtime. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 725

You deserved it 2 251

By swtkiss1 - 18/02/2009 22:26 - United States

Today, my mom cleaned up my room. I had a drawer filled with condoms, 2 vibrators, and a bondage kit. She organized the condoms and vibrators in a shoe box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 912

You deserved it 58 620

By ummWhat? - 23/12/2018 02:00

Today my car was broken into. The only thing taken were condoms and lighters I had in the glove box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 156

You deserved it 201

By niii - 26/11/2008 04:26 - France

Today, as I often do, I had sex in my old car. I'm 25, my boyfriend is 28 and we're still living with our parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 230

You deserved it 14 043

Privacy

By Anonymous - 25/11/2023 22:00 - Germany

Today, I’m 20 and my mom is well aware I’m having sex. Nonetheless, this morning when my boyfriend was going down on me under the covers, she marched into my room without knocking, dumped a load of wet laundry on my sofa, and walked back out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 169

You deserved it 394

skierguy 0

Monday 13 April 2009 20:35

I don't really see what the importance of the "I'm twenty" part is. That would be embarrassing at any age, but by twenty I should think your mom would be OK with you having sex and drinking. If you were 16 that might be a different story.

ambrz 0

Monday 22 February 2010 8:17

Then I'm 20 is important because the drinking age in America is 21 lol

Comments

micadjems 0

Monday 13 April 2009 20:41

Not a problem in canada.....

babbu18 0

Monday 25 July 2011 6:32

lol yeah just gotta be 18 and your freeeeeeeeeeee and you can't be arrested to have it unless ur drinking and driving!!

VeryEZ2Remember 0

Monday 13 April 2009 20:42

YDI you dumb idiot :)

piderman13 0

Monday 13 April 2009 20:43

........wow mentally handicapped people aren't as retarded as you

Tehalon 0

Monday 13 April 2009 20:43

You're 20, whats the problem?

XxEmoSnowboarder 8

Tuesday 5 July 2011 17:31

you have to be 21 to drink legally

raabhimself 0

Monday 13 April 2009 20:45

I wouldn't let my mom drive, she's narcoleptic

Callyn 47

Monday 13 April 2009 20:44

Having an empty bottle of booze in your seat is illegal no matter how old you are. How are the cops supposed to know you haven't been drinking it while driving? You're a moron.

TheOptimist 0

Sunday 5 June 2011 8:54

Breathalyzer. Moron.

Gryphon 0

Monday 13 April 2009 20:45

You diserved that.. but adding in "i'm twenty" made you sound like some sort of goody two shoes.... I'm 17 and up to the same stuff but I don't think of myself as a rebel... meh whats she going to do?

Enslaved 36

Thursday 3 January 2013 16:12

Adding the OP's age does matter. She's 20 meaning she's an under age drinker. She's in the States. I doubt the mom is going to think she's a: "Goody Two Shoe." Damn now I'm singing--Adam Ant Don't drink, don't smoke. What do you do? At least she practices saver sex. (:

jam26 0

Monday 13 April 2009 20:47

a) you're driving a mustang so I'm going to assume you're a girl, (if not, then well...buy a real sports car) just be straight up with your mom that you're an alcoholic sex freak. b) who leaves all that shit on the seat of your car? regardless of your mothers presence in the vehicle, those are the things you leave in a plastic bag tucked under the seat. c) where is the sex toy if it's not in the packaging? ;) ;)