By nightjay - 11/07/2016 14:32 - United States - Cincinnati

Spicy
Today, I got grounded for having a boner when I woke up. FML
I agree, your life sucks 21 315
You deserved it 1 552

nightjay tells us more.

nightjay 21

Hi, OP here! It was just a casual morning today, and since my mom usually waits for me to get up (because I'm usually pretty lazy out of bed), they wouldn't leave my bedside. Not wanting to embarrass myself in front of my extremely Catholic mom, I said no when she kept on telling me to get up. Finally, laying on my side (facing away from my mom) she boils over and pulls the covers off, and in my attempt to save my covers from falling on the floor, she sees my boner and immediately assumes I was masturbating. I don't know which was worse: getting grounded, getting the "masturbation is evil" talk, or having my mom see my dick. Triple FML. Thanks for the support! All the penis-puns make me smile :)

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Top comments

DarkLink9001 15

Do your parents understand... well.. anything?

556 2
bellydancer82 15

How DARE you have a boner! Shame on you for being a normal male! Sorry OP, that really sucks, I wonder why your parents aren't more understanding.

382 4

Comments

DarkLink9001 15

Do your parents understand... well.. anything?

556 2
TheNewGuy03 28

Since it seems as if the parents have no idea how basic human physiology works, I would have to assume that OP is a miracle baby and was immaculately conceived.

14 1
Colon_Man 17

You should be careful, though. You don't want to thrust a lot of information at them. Their brains pulsating and throbbing until they're dribbling all over the carpet.

3 11
ncsMcLaren77 12

So instead of the Immaculate Reception, OP was the the Immaculate Conception?

0 0
bellydancer82 15

How DARE you have a boner! Shame on you for being a normal male! Sorry OP, that really sucks, I wonder why your parents aren't more understanding.

382 4
soodytheboi 23

Why did your parents even take notice of that and point it out to you? It's perfectly normal. OP's parents are kinda weird...

106 1
ifuckuprandomly 28

Is your penis the real Slim Shady? Because he stood up.

168 6
Red_Curls1995 28

That's extremely unfair, it's not like you can help it and it's normal.

58 0
Sheepiebeepie 26

Do you have two moms? how were you not defended

67 6
blacklightening 11

dad's are usually two much of cowards to stand op to there wife's. I watch my dad. chicken out each day to the whim of my mom

1 1
MitchRapp 20

The morning monster can't be controlled.

46 1