Health: Today, I fell asleep after finishing my exam. I had a dream I...

By M_Kclift1994 - 20/01/2010 23:19 - United States

Today, I fell asleep after finishing my exam. I had a dream I was falling and woke up smashing my face on the desk. Everyone laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 712

You deserved it 8 477

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 23/03/2009 19:06 - United States

Today, I fell asleep in class. As a joke, my professor used an airhorn to wake me up. I got so freaked out that I punched the girl next to me in the face. She got knocked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 93 362

You deserved it 34 841

By IngenuityAbsent - 22/02/2015 13:54 - Canada - Grimsby

Today, I had a dream where I whacked my head against my shelf. I woke up immediately after, freaked out and whacked my head against my shelf. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 233

You deserved it 4 754

By teepee - 13/11/2009 15:53 - United Kingdom

Today, I fell asleep in a lecture. I laughed at something amusing in Dreamworld, but the laugh came out as a prolonged creepy groan in Lectureworld. I woke up to see everyone within a 5 meter radius staring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 114

You deserved it 14 008

By Erin - 15/01/2009 15:05 - United States

Today, I fell asleep in English and drooled on my test. Evidently everyone noticed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 387

You deserved it 20 654

By Anonymous - 02/02/2013 07:50 - United States - Tucson

Today, as I was leaving for my chemistry exam, I stepped on one of the countless sheets of chemistry notes that littered the floor following last night's studying. I managed to slip and knock myself out in my own living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 200

You deserved it 6 573

By kingkobrastrikes - 21/01/2015 01:56 - United States

Today, I was asleep and snored so loud that I woke myself up. I was at work and I am now the laughing stock of the office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 516

You deserved it 20 530

Dozing off

By Math_Rocker - 02/09/2009 22:17 - United States

Today, I fell asleep in class. Usually, people just sit still when asleep. Nope, not me. Not only had I been violently rocking and nodding my head, the teacher stopped class for everyone to see for 5 minutes as she made jokes. What woke me? The intense laughter, followed by embarrassment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 324

You deserved it 35 133

By sleepwalker - 14/09/2010 18:32 - United States

Today, I fell asleep in my math class. Turns out I sleep walk. I woke up at the front of the room with chalk in my hand, scribbles on the board behind me, and the whole class laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 610

You deserved it 8 389

Make it stop!

By DBR - 23/04/2009 10:45 - United States

Today, my alarm went off. I reached to swat it, missed, slipped, smacked my face on my dresser, and fell on the floor. As I picked myself up off the floor, I hit my head on the open top drawer of my other dresser. In 30 seconds of consciousness, I was attacked by two pieces of furniture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 893

You deserved it 11 463

By embarassed - 21/04/2011 03:24 - United States

Today, I fell asleep at a party. I farted so loud that I woke myself up. Everyone heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 337

You deserved it 12 936

iamgoofymovie 0

Thursday 21 January 2010 1:35

#11 quit complaining because ur fml's don't get posted...ur being a big baby...

asafetybuzz 0

Thursday 21 January 2010 1:44

your friend's fml was probably rejected because it was SAD! this site is meant to be light and funny, not depressing. we're supposed to get a laugh at someone else's expense. it would be pretty ****** up to laugh at your friend's fml.

Comments

iamgoofymovie 0

Thursday 21 January 2010 1:35

#11 quit complaining because ur fml's don't get posted...ur being a big baby...

Soulathyia 0

Thursday 21 January 2010 1:38

You're the one who's name is the title of a babys movie. FYL.

uhhheyy 0

Thursday 21 January 2010 1:40

everyone who has a profile pic is either a twelve year old girl or a guy's abs ..... wth ?

epoh_fml 0

Thursday 21 January 2010 1:42

bitter much, soulathyia?

iamgoofymovie 0

Thursday 21 January 2010 1:43

ur the one being a cry baby bitch cuz u can't get a fml posted FYL

yourefreakindumb 0

Thursday 21 January 2010 9:24

Yes, we've already established that dip shit.

barbieee420 1

Monday 26 March 2012 23:29

Ur immature

omgmorganomg 0

Thursday 21 January 2010 1:43

but fyl, even though I laughed :)

Soulathyia 0

Thursday 21 January 2010 1:44

No it's just I really used to like this site but lately it's just lame. Most of them are in no way fmls/aren't the least bit funny or obviously fake.

iamgoofymovie 0

Thursday 21 January 2010 1:46

well I actually agree with u on that one. haha

KingDingALing 9

Thursday 21 January 2010 1:46

U shouldnt have fallen asleep dumbass

dman5 0

Thursday 21 January 2010 1:48

when people fall asleep in class, when the teacher isn't looking I would take a sharpie and draw dicks on peoples faces

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The Top

Today, I learned my dad is the kindest, most generous, hard-working soul anyone has ever met. He'll give someone the shirt off his back if they need help. Except for us, his immediate family, whom he screams and cusses at daily, expects to do everything ourselves, and thinks we're incompetent when we need help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 495

You deserved it 91

Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend had promised that the day would belong to me. But no, I had to drive 80km forth and back to pick him up from work, then he took pictures with his new camera lens, then he decided what to eat, demanded a massage, and then he just fell asleep. Happy birthday to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 165

You deserved it 269

The Top

Today, while driving extremely fast on a road in the middle of nowhere, I started to go down a hill. Noticing a police car at the bottom, I slammed my brakes and blew a tire in the process. It turns out the police car was an old cutout used to trick people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 357

You deserved it 57 730

Today, I finally worked up the courage to play my friends the demo CD that I've spent all summer recording. I didn't tell them it was me. Not even 10 seconds into the first song, my best friend asked me to turn it off because it sucked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 587

You deserved it 6 653

Today, I was promoted to a management position and finally get to have my own office, only to find out it's located in the basement and has no windows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 880

You deserved it 122

Today, my teacher said that since I was sick last week, I had to do all the work that the others had done, which i didn't know of because no one said anything about it. So now I've got to watch a total of 5 hours-worth of documentaries, and write analysis of them. Before tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 860

You deserved it 181

Today, my doctor confirmed I’m pregnant, but she phrased it as, “I’ve got some bad news for you, you’re pregnant.” I could be wrong but should a health professional automatically assume a pregnancy is unwanted? Plus she’s spent months helping us with fertility advice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 576

You deserved it 111

Today, I had to do the job of 3 to 4 people. Spending the first half in the bakery by myself, I then had to run over to the deli and cook everything for the day while helping lines of customers. Why? Because 8 people are on Covid leave. Instead of shutting down the department, welcome to hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 082

You deserved it 1 223

Same thing different taste

Dozing off

Make it stop!

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