Health: Today, I farted in front of my husband for the first time in...

By lol - 05/12/2011 06:13 - United States

Today, I farted in front of my husband for the first time in 26 years. He told our kids over email, and now they won't shut up about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 519

You deserved it 9 260

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Same thing different taste

By Susan - 28/02/2012 11:55 - Canada

Today, I farted in front of my husband. It somehow turned into a farting war. Then I realized this is the closest we've come to intimacy in a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 955

You deserved it 6 829

By deerling - 18/03/2019 06:00 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I accidentally farted really loud. My 4 year-old brother heard me and started crying and stopped talking to me for a whole hour. Now he tells everyone about "that time his sister farted." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 928

You deserved it 334

By Ted - 06/06/2019 18:00

Today, I finally felt comfortable enough to fart in front of my boyfriend for the first time. He went quiet, got up and left in his car. I haven't heard from him in 4 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 173

You deserved it 473

By flipflop - 07/06/2010 07:03 - United States

Today, I got married. I was so nervous right before I said my vows that, in the dead silence, I farted. Loud. My brother showed me afterwards, on tape, over and over and over again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 307

You deserved it 7 438

By Anonymous - 27/09/2015 07:10 - United States - Queens Village

Today, while singing Happy Birthday to my husband, I desperately needed to fart. I couldn't leave the room, so I let it out real slow. There were over 20 of us there, yet somehow my mother-in-law knew it was me. She went over to the window and opened it wide, all while glaring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 129

You deserved it 4 058

By Madi - 30/11/2011 17:55 - United States

Today, my boyfriend discovered that I fart when I'm tickled enough. The best part was when he decided to show his family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 726

You deserved it 3 610

Skidmarks

By smelly asses - 17/09/2020 07:50

Today, my husband and my daughter engaged in a fart war. Guess who go to do a pile of shitty laundry, while the other texted his friends about the “hilarious” incident? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 158

You deserved it 191

By Anonymous - 18/01/2011 08:28 - United States

Today, I was at the grocery store with my dad. He let out a very silent but foul abomination of a fart. The people behind us started gagging, so he turned, pointed at me and said "That was my daughter." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 156

You deserved it 3 830

By Mj - 20/07/2016 00:28 - Canada - Windsor

Today, I farted in a public pool and watched in horror as bubbles of death gas floated up beside my son who started calling me the fart monster in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 763

You deserved it 4 263

By lambeaster - 20/01/2016 14:27 - United States - Washington

Today, I accidentally let out a silent but obscenely deadly fart in the doctor's waiting room. It was so foul that a woman got insanely pissed at her kid because she thought he'd shat his pants again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 818

You deserved it 3 698

AsianCookie247 14

Monday 5 December 2011 11:37

You Are just now farting in front of him? ...

sariannacanna 6

Monday 5 December 2011 11:42

How did you survive for 26 years and never farting in front of him?!? Thats some extreme control *claps and nods* lol

Comments

DustyStorm 16

Wednesday 30 May 2012 14:02

Not the first.....everyone farts in their sleep. My boyfriend is mortified every time he does it but it's involuntary. No biggie.

13yearoldpridigy 1

Saturday 6 April 2013 9:27

I want to say kudos, but at the same time, why do you seem to care? Humans fart, get over it. Plus, I'm betting your husband doesn't care, and is even happy to see you do something gross.

therouni 23

Friday 27 September 2013 20:55

Are you kidding? I was ripping off in front of my husband on our second date! How can you be comfortable with someone that youre afraid to fart in front of them?

SexyMexi21 23

Saturday 7 June 2014 22:28

It's not a real relationship if you never darted in front of each other.

Onyx3288 22

Tuesday 17 June 2014 5:36

You haven't trusted your husband enough to fart in front of him in 26 years?!!! Sweetie, start letting them rip!

SyLord 13

Wednesday 31 December 2014 17:28

Wow, women fart?

PuppiesKisses 15

Sunday 29 November 2015 14:00

Wow I started farting in front of my fiancé after a year of dating. If I'm going to spend my life with someone I'm not going to spend most my life holding in a fart. Good for you OP keep up the flatulence.

west546 13

Tuesday 5 January 2016 3:34

Girls don't fart. This is a fake FML post

unholyswiss 19

Wednesday 6 April 2016 8:27

What kind of relationship did you have where you can't even trust each other with something that natural?

toxictears6661 8

Monday 6 June 2016 17:59

it took you 26 years? nice. my boyfriend of about almost 8 months and I fart in front of each other all the time. we even have farting competitions sometimes. we also have an inside joke cuz once I had to climb over him to get in my bed, and he wouldn't let me move, so I was like "I'm gonna fart on you" and he let me go and was like "no you won't!" and I was like "are you sure?" and he was like "I'm positive about it" so I just turned away from him so my butt was facing him, and I let one rip. it was truly hilarious, and we still joke about it.