Work: Today, at work as a cashier, I was scanning cantaloupes. The... - FML

By Nice Melons - 29/09/2013 21:12 - United States

Today, at work as a cashier, I was scanning cantaloupes. The man buying them then looked me straight in the eye and said, "Nice melons." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 700

You deserved it 4 949

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

That makes sense

By HistoryHasEyes - 04/09/2020 23:01

Today, I was working in the produce department at my work. A lady came in to return some mangos. I asked her what the problem with the mangoes was. She said she didn't like the way they were talking to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 374

You deserved it 114

By insanitycalling - 26/10/2011 06:36 - Canada

Today, at my job as a produce clerk at a grocery store, I had an entire conversation with my coworker about how nice the new cabbage boxes are. This is all it takes to thrill me these days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 442

You deserved it 3 476

By Ann - 18/06/2009 19:40 - United States

Today, I went to the store to buy some groceries. While I was at the store, an employee came up to me and said, "You're beautiful!" When I came home I told my husband what had just happened. My husband then asked, "What was wrong with him?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 541

You deserved it 5 477

Nice try

By UncleRory - 16/05/2009 09:13 - United States

Today, I was shopping at a supermarket. As I was about to pay for my items, I noticed the cashier was very cute. Trying to be nice, I smiled. She smiled back and said, "Hello, how are you?" Instead of saying, "I'm good" or, "I'm okay", I said, "I'm gay". FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 304

You deserved it 25 522

By sarah - 19/10/2011 19:36 - United States

Today, I went to the store to pick up some tampons. After waiting in line for about 10 minutes, the male cashier looked at me when I was leaving and said, "Have a nice... week!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 070

You deserved it 5 161

By beckbm23 - 21/11/2009 05:03 - United States

Today, at work at a grocery store an old couple came through my checkout lane. As I was putting their bagged groceries in the cart, the old man started feeling me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 157

You deserved it 2 590

Flowers (Nothing But)

By ThisIsMyLife - 15/09/2019 12:00

Today, I bought flowers with my groceries at the grocery store. After the cashier scanned them, he handed them back to me so they wouldn't get crushed in my cart. It was then that I realized he's the first man to ever hand me flowers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 676

You deserved it 256

By awkward - 06/11/2013 21:16 - Canada - Okotoks

Today, at a grocery store, a man came up to me while I was picking out apples and whispered in my ear, "That's how Snow White died." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 567

You deserved it 4 308

Casual something

By lukey101 - 14/02/2021 18:30 - Australia

Today, I went to the Asian Grocery. I politely smiled, bellowed, “Hello!” and kind of waved to the cashier as I walked in, to which he gave me a blank, scared-for-his-life kinda look. Turns out he was actually just another customer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 638

You deserved it 403

A cashier's life

By amy - 16/10/2013 21:52 - United States - Wellesley Hills

Today, as I worked as a cashier, two girls came up laughing. I smiled as I rang them up, asking what had made them laugh so hard. One looked me dead in the face and said, "You." They then both walked away, laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 809

You deserved it 3 976

Next

Top comments

tinyrosie 21

Monday 30 September 2013 8:42

Well, at least he wasn't looking you straight in the boobs.

thatonegirlnic 10

Monday 30 September 2013 8:42

Hey it's a compliment. For both you and the fruit. Bravo

Comments

appforthat 9

Tuesday 1 October 2013 4:02

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

JohnTheLad 13

Tuesday 1 October 2013 8:03

I hope you had some kind of response or smart remark in return.

cmac86 23

Tuesday 1 October 2013 9:03

thank you, they're for sale.

icepick23 12

Tuesday 1 October 2013 20:30

Melons do not have bar codes. Yawn...

footcheezeez 16

Wednesday 2 October 2013 5:11

lol

Amberm13357 8

Thursday 3 October 2013 11:59

You should've said yea they're real. Are yours?

MidnightMadness 8

Saturday 5 October 2013 1:28

lmao that is genius...customers come out with some funny stuff :L

lilushi 8

Saturday 12 October 2013 20:51

I know that feel, sister

donutcallmethat 16

Sunday 10 November 2013 19:51

This brings back unpleasant retail memories. Whether or not it was a disgusting thing to say, depends on the person who said it and how he said it. However, it was inappropriate. When I worked in retail customers would always think they were funny, giving me a hard time, just because they could. And the gross men who thought I was their for their titillation, bleh!

Awkward beyond belief 14

Sunday 2 November 2014 15:52

OMG! This is the best FML I've ever read. I have never laughed at any FML but this one!

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Keywords

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If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DA. But DON'T send your illustration right away! You need first to get in touch with me, and I'll tell you what you have to do!...

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 3

Today, I found out that I didn't get a job because I failed the psychological analysis. It told me to answer each question and tell the truth. So I did. I asked my friend, who got the job, if she told the truth. She said no. Apparently you have to lie in order to get a job. Sorry for being honest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 506

You deserved it 7 861

The Top

Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 816

You deserved it 6 585

Today, things were going great with my girlfriend of six months. She knew I had kids and it seemed to be getting serious, so I decided to introduce her to them. After dinner, I walked her to her car and she said, "That’s real nice but what are you going to do with them once you and I have kids?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 542

You deserved it 210

Today, my boss yelled at me for visiting Facebook on my work computer. He says that since I can't be trusted, I'll be supervised from now on. I was uploading pictures to the company's Facebook page, which I have to do once a week as part of my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 183

You deserved it 2 696

Today, I walked into the gym I’ve been going to for years and two girls blatantly turned their phones in my direction, probably trying to record a TikTok of me glancing at them, so they could accuse me of perving for Facebook likes. I turned round and went home. Screw them for ruining my workout. FML

I agree, your life sucks 585

You deserved it 156

Today, I arrived home to find I'd been broken in to. The culprit? An obese homeless man, who I found face down, unconscious, and surrounded by muesli bar wrappers in my pantry. He broke in, ate everything in sight, soiled himself, and passed out. The worst part? The cops don't even believe me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 802

You deserved it 2 749

Today, I realized just how fragile and idiotic my brother is. At a family get together, I bought a giant box of popsicles for all the kids to enjoy. He refused to let his sons have one, because according to him, “it looks gay”. I swear my mother found him by the road or something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 033

You deserved it 90