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By Anonymous - / Wednesday 24 June 2015 02:48 / Australia - Bankstown
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By  JustJumped  |  22

Maybe it just a panicked reaction

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  NickACD  |  27

Yeah, OP, don't look too much into it, she may just need some time to think about it. Who knows, that bouquet toss could cause her to propose to you.

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  dcam13  |  19

or he doesn't know her as well as he should. you should know where your Gf/Bf stands on the idea of getting married before popping the question. it's not ruining the surprise for her to know you want to marry her sometime. it's called communication and saving everyone a lot of hurt and embarrassment in the future.

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  ThatOneChick856  |  35

#90- I completely agree. Anyone who cares about "ruining the surprise" above their partner's very real and valid lifelong goals/dreams has a serious issue.

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  boating_guy  |  33

My thought exactly. This isn't nearly as much of an FML as it could have been. OP's girlfriend could have shrugged it off, OP proposed, and THEN got shut down infront of everyone. At his sisters wedding no less. Now that is an FML

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  ThatOneChick856  |  35

I think the OP (and other people proposing) should ALWAYS know exactly how the other person feels before proposing. You kinda just don't drop a bomb of "being together forever" on someone. And that whole "it's supposed to be a surprise!" excuse is lame. No, the surprise is "surprise! I'll bet you didn't expect me to propose in this way at this time!", not "surprise! You have to spend the rest of your life with me!"

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  hawaiiankitty  |  11

Just because you propose doesn't mean you have to spend the rest of your life with me. It means I want to make us serious and ale a serious commitment. She oils have said no anyways.

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  ThatOneChick856  |  35

Yes, you're right, a serious commitment- the commitment of being together for the rest of your lives. That is why it's so serious and also why you shouldn't "surprise" someone with that sort of news. Even if someone DOES see the relationship as a serious one, it can be a helluva shock when you hear that they want to spend forever with you. Forever is a long time.

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  Brandi_Faith  |  33

I couldn't agree more 49!! It's mind boggling to me to think that someone will propose without having talked (at length) about whether they want to get married or not. The response to the proposal shouldn't be a surprise. They should know without a doubt what the answer will be. And the whole "it's supposed to be a surprise" thing, I couldn't agree with you more. The surprise is in the way he proposed and the timing of it. Not "surprise, I know we've never talked about this before, but I think we should spend the rest of our lives together, side-by-side, forever!" Op, I know you're probably upset right now, but this is a huge blessing in disguise!! You can't imagine how painful and embarrassing it would've been if you had proposed and she said no. It would've ruined the whole night for yourself, your girlfriend, and your entire family...including your sister when it's supposed to be the most incredible day of her life. It would've put a damper on the rest of the night and you would've probably had to leave to get away from the embarrassment. It would've even affected any future proposals. Take this as a sign to not propose again (to her or anyone else) without having talked with her, at length, about getting married beforehand.

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  foxy_grampa  |  19

While I do agree with you #49 that you should know how they feel, that doesn't mean they hadn't talked about marriage before. You don't have to ask if they're okay with you proposing because there should be conversations held beforehand about marriage. Maybe she just felt like it was too soon to get married, since catching the bouquet is supposed to mean you're next to get married, but she told OP that she wants to marry him someday. That could be where the difference is

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  ThatOneChick856  |  35

#112- I don't see how you can agree with me because my whole point was essentially asking if it's okay to propose. Maybe not in a "so I'm thinking of proposing to you next week, will that fit your schedule?" way, but definitely go in depth about future plans together around when you're planning to buy the ring. "I want to get married someday" is NOT an indicator of when and how you should propose- if at all. Maybe they want to wait another ten years to get hitched because of school; maybe they aren't financially stable and it's not even in the question right now; maybe they just don't see that kind of future with you. Yes, maybe OP's gf wants to get married SOMEDAY, but him being surprised by her reaction implies he never talked to her (IN DEPTH) about what she wants for the future at all. Like I said- the surprise isn't the fact that you're proposing, but how and (reasonably) when.

By  thefmlman2011  |  30

Aww, I'm sorry OP! I hope you end up proposing to her somewhere else!

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  Gardevoir2  |  11

So when in a relationship you HAVE to get married or it's over ?

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  aloha_oe  |  24

I don't believe in marriage but both people in a relationship should have the same goal. If one partner wants to get married and the other doesn't, I don't think it will work well.

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  lovelockdown23  |  23

" yeah she didn't want me to propose to her at my sisters wedding maybe I should just propose at a dinner next time " the problem isn't where, it's communication. he obviously needs to talk to her.

By  Cads1  |  24

She's a keeper.

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  Queensland  |  27

You must feel better now.

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  LandoKid  |  9

This is probably the most obvious, and logical, thing to do. Why assume? maybe marriage is not something she wants to talk about? And maybe even think about what kind of relationship you two have.

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  marcranger  |  28

The proposal itself can still be a surprise. The fact that one partner wants the legal commitment and one does not should not be left unstated until that surprise takes place.

By  Invictus_Anima  |  5

Things don't always go as planned. Maybe you should try and talk to her about how she feels about it since that was a really indirect way of seeing how she feels about marriage. It looks bleak but you should definitely talk to her just so you're not making assumptions. Good luck OP!

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