Miscellaneous: Today, a group of friends and I went out to a fancy club together....

By arse-face - 28/06/2013 23:22 - Ireland - Caher

Today, a group of friends and I went out to a fancy club together. The doorman checked us out and let everyone in. Everyone except me, that is. The doorman's reason: "Her face looks like a baboon's arse." My "friends" all went in anyway, leaving me to walk all the way home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 992

You deserved it 4 859

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Same thing different taste

By obese_chicken - 06/11/2009 06:59 - Australia

Today, I went out to celebrate my birthday with a big group of friends. After waiting in line to get into a club, the bouncer looked me up and down and said, "No fat chicks." My friends went into the club without me and left me to take a $100 taxi home alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 053

You deserved it 8 323

By I Tried - 29/01/2016 22:18 - United States - Burton

Today, I went out clubbing and hit the dance floor, hoping to impress some girls with my moves. All I got was a bunch of weird looks and was told by one girl that I'm the "whitest black guy" she's ever seen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 448

You deserved it 3 639

By Anonymous - 01/12/2012 00:31 - United States - Rocklin

Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 187

You deserved it 21 603

By ThisIsWhyIStayAtHome - 24/05/2014 00:09 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I was at a nightclub when some dick squeezed the ass of the girl beside me. She whirled around and started yelling and slapping me across the face. I was dragged out by the bouncers, to cheers from the people around us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 315

You deserved it 3 401

By intranator - 08/04/2009 21:43 - Jordan

Today, I waited in line to get into a club with my girlfriend, the bouncer only let her in, she told me to call her if I needed anything and left me. We were supposed to celebrate my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 117 920

You deserved it 9 689

By grenade - 17/07/2011 06:24 - United States

Today, I was at a club with my friends, when a group of guys approached us. It got quiet for a second, and I heard one of them say, "It's okay, I've got the fat one this time," then walk over and start talking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 007

You deserved it 7 900

By Jon - 14/05/2012 21:46 - New Zealand - Christchurch

Today, I went to a club with some friends. I ordered two drinks from the waitress and gave her a fifty. She never returned with the change, and the rest of the staff claimed they didn't know who I was talking about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 704

You deserved it 6 207

By Anonymous - 07/12/2012 21:28 - United States

Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 524

You deserved it 3 188

Hott

By uglyone - 13/01/2010 14:06 - United Kingdom

Today, I was going out with my supermodel-gorgeous friend, so I put extra effort into looking good. I thought I looked pretty good, but when we got to the subway station, a drunk old man looked at us and loudly announced, "That's always the way it is, there's a fit one and an ugly one." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 152

You deserved it 3 437

By Anonymous - 27/11/2010 15:32 - Canada

Today, I went downtown with my friends. A group of guys came up to us and started hitting on everyone except me. Then one of them said, "Do you girls hang out with her to make yourselves look better?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 842

You deserved it 3 856

DerrickJames 33

Saturday 29 June 2013 5:17

Those aren't your friends.

RoboCunnilingus 23

Saturday 29 June 2013 5:18

Shitty bouncer. Shittier friends.

Comments

killuminatirebel 12

Saturday 29 June 2013 6:31

If i were u i would **** that doorman up

StarEatingDemon 9

Saturday 29 June 2013 6:48

It's time to go hunting for new friends! When I went through a situation with people that I thought were my friends, I found that the people that I considered kinda/sorta friends were the ones that were truly there for me.

MidnaLink 33

Saturday 29 June 2013 6:58

That ******** needs to be ******* fired right NOW!

ashleighlaine 21

Saturday 29 June 2013 7:00

bars are better anyway. go make some new friends!

zMEEHANz 13

Saturday 29 June 2013 7:02

PENIS

bioss89 16

Saturday 29 June 2013 7:11

I think we are better than your friends. At least most of us are supportive :)

KBurns207 17

Saturday 29 June 2013 7:12

You should've pulled the doorman line from knocked up.

chuckcloninger 12

Saturday 29 June 2013 7:16

I can understand the votes for "Your life sucks" but I don't get why anyone would say "You deserve it" is just a mean asshole and a creep. I don't really know what to say except the obvious fact that these people were never friends and maybe you need higher syamdard

TogeBara 12

Saturday 29 June 2013 7:34

Pick your response: 1) Welcome to the internet. 2) Her fault for being born with a baboon's arse for a face <- sarcasm 3) You are new here aren't you?