Awkward, Texting, Party and Love: Stuck on Amber

Stuck on Amber

By 1234567898765432 - 27/03/2009 16:47 - Canada

Today, I went to a Stoplight Party. Green shirt = single, yellow = hard to get, and red = taken. I showed up wearing a red shirt and saw my boyfriend in a green shirt. Thinking it was a mistake, I asked him jokingly why he wasn't wearing red. He looked at me oddly and said, "Oh, you didn't get my text?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 113 672

You deserved it 6 121

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Same thing different taste

Deception

By bobthenun - 20/03/2013 21:16 - United States - Santa Barbara

Today, I went out to a restaurant to meet a girl that I met online. When I arrived, I texted her and she said she was wearing a blue shirt. The only person that was wearing anything blue was a fat man smiling in the corner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 268

You deserved it 10 765

Lonely

By reddd - 10/05/2012 06:44 - United States

Today, I purposely wore a red shirt to Target just so people would talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 006

You deserved it 11 419

By Rejected. - 22/11/2009 17:49 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at a party with my boyfriend of one year when an attractive girl walks over. She asks him, "Is this your girlfriend?" He replied "That depends... are you single?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 378

You deserved it 3 922

By Anonymous - 20/05/2009 18:34 - United States

Today, my friend and I decided to wear a new red lipstick. The guy I like turned around, looked at her and said, "Red is a really interesting, sexy color. Pretty bold. Not bad." and he smiled. I waited, smiling also, only for him frown and say, "Your teeth are REALLY yellow." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 072

You deserved it 17 582

By Diet_Water - 14/02/2016 05:01 - United States - Moreno Valley

Today, I wore my boyfriend's favorite shirt to surprise him and show him how sexy I look. He made me take it off and pay the bill for dry cleaner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 886

You deserved it 4 700

Just checking

By xrebeccalou - 25/12/2010 04:59 - United States

Today, I went to my long-distance boyfriend's party. His best friend was talking to me and trying to make conversation, he asked, "So, are you two official?" I responded with a definite yes, but was cut off mid-word by my boyfriend, who quickly said, "No, not really." Sorry, I wasn't aware, darling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 608

You deserved it 4 367

By Anonymous - 26/08/2015 11:28 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend I had to go out and that I'd be back later. He asked where I was going. "To see my other boyfriend," I chuckled, smiling. He took it seriously and wouldn't believe it was just a joke. I'm pretty sure I'm now single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 433

You deserved it 10 104

By Anonymous - 27/10/2014 06:01 - United States

Today, I asked my boyfriend what he was being for Halloween. He said "Single". FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 003

You deserved it 5 182

By Anonymous - 02/10/2010 13:04 - United States

Today, my boyfriend called me over for dinner. When I walked in the door, he asked why I was here; apparently he dialed the wrong girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 936

You deserved it 3 166

By Anonymous - 22/12/2016 05:03

Today, I bought a rather unique shirt for my boyfriend, planning to give it to him for Christmas. He showed up wearing the same shirt. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 517

You deserved it 681

dickinabox 0

Friday 27 March 2009 22:33

Who breaks up over text!? Good thing he broke up with you, he has no class. Best regards, S

Megbo 0

Friday 27 March 2009 22:32

Ouch...that sucks :/

Comments

mikeloyst 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 4:16

Steal that bitches green shirt and start looking for someone with class.

WendlaMimii 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 4:26

He's an idiot. Don't worry about it, there are MUCH better guys out there.

jassyonyae 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 4:34

sounds fun but i would have KNOCKED HIM OUT

BLACKOUT0828 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 5:01

*FALCON PUNCH*

eschreib 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 5:40

damnnn..

Anonymus101 4

Saturday 28 March 2009 5:47

That's crappy but at least you know he's a dick and you can move on with your life.

dreamyms 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 6:32

He's such a loser. Breaking up using text message=Epic fail.

RageNeko 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 6:41

I'm sorry =( Search for "text message breakup" by kelly on youtube Then try to feel better :)

Lolrus 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 7:08

Wow, thats a weird theme for a party .

KTteaspoon 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 8:57

Definitely listen to #59. And honey, you're worth way more than that douche.

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I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

Today, I told my man that, in order to get me ready for sex within a minute whenever he wants, he only needs to relearn how to go down on me, which he used to do splendidly but has somehow forgotten. He apparently considers this too much effort and will rather keep groping me unsuccessfully. FML

I agree, your life sucks 413

You deserved it 107

The Top

Today, to teach my 14-year-old son a serious lesson for bullying a child at school again, I grounded him for the rest of the year. He just snorted and said, "Cool, I'll just jack off all year then! Thanks, mum!" and happily retreated to his bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 612

You deserved it 9 127

Today, I spat up blood and had horrible chest pain. My mom still made me go to school, claiming she needed to take the cat to the vet instead of me to the doctor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 205

You deserved it 2 408

Today, while dreaming, I was thirsty and grabbed a glass of water to drink. The taste was so horrible that it caused me to wake up and realize I was drinking the isopropyl alcohol I keep on my nightstand for my CPAP machine. All Poison Control had to say was, "Uh oh." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 788

You deserved it 611

Today, I woke up to the rickety old ceiling fan above my bed crashing down on top of me. I'm fine, however I am now grounded until I can buy a new ceiling fan to replace the one I "broke". FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 988

You deserved it 286

Today, two children decided it would be fun to try to ding-dong-ditch me. I never answered the door as I saw them running away. They did it a couple of times before getting bored. That's when they decided it would be fun to come into my house instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 182

You deserved it 5 164

Today, I was worried because it's July and I still haven't found a summer job, despite applying to 50 places. It was fine, because I remembered my savings account. I told my parents. Instead of being relieved, they said they're going to take the money from me for being lazy, and using it for my tuition, despite promising to pay for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 775

You deserved it 340