Grandparents and Intimacy: Sex work is real work - FML

Sex work is real work

By thatssickkk - 17/02/2010 06:40 - United States

Spicy

Today, my grandmother decided to tell me about her past as a prostitute. In full detail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 553

You deserved it 2 726

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

My ears!

By epistaxis - 02/02/2009 00:43 - Australia

Spicy

Today, I'm staying with my grandmother and overheard her having phone sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 409

You deserved it 2 685

Mad beliefs

By Anonymous - 12/04/2009 00:20 - United States

Spicy

Today, my grandmother gave me a huge speech on being abstinent until marriage. Being the honest person that I am, I told her I wasn't a virgin anymore. Instead of being mad and telling me I was going to hell. She asked me what my favourite things to do sexually were. And told me hers in detail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 239

You deserved it 20 788

By tdiz - 12/10/2010 04:48 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I was getting frisky with my fiancée when she started talking about her dead great-grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 879

You deserved it 3 566

By Username - 13/09/2010 23:19 - France

Today, I found out my grandmother doesn't wear underwear when she bent over in front of me in her inappropriately short nightgown. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 633

You deserved it 2 840

Her House, Her Rules.

By Anonymous - 02/08/2019 16:03

Today, my grandma told me she likes to clean the house naked every day. I'm staying there all next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 580

You deserved it 149

Stop talking!

By Lunar-Spice - 23/06/2021 00:01 - United States - Midlothian

Today, I found out that my great-grandmother was a cougar, seducing men who were barely older than I am now. I did not need to know this information. Thanks Grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 001

You deserved it 208

Nice to see you

By meeee - 13/02/2021 23:01

Today, I saw my 89 year-old grandmother naked. She just moved in with us and apparently, she has an "open door policy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 906

You deserved it 95

By lady_jeni - 09/07/2009 07:29 - United States

Today, I went to see my grandmother. She has alzheimers and doesn't remember me sometimes, and today she thought I was her sister and that I was trying to steal my grandfather from her. She hit me with a cane and called me a slut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 512

You deserved it 3 232

By Brie - 05/09/2011 13:00 - United States

Spicy

Today, my grandmother pulled down her pants and screamed, "Kiss my ass" in the middle of a packed restaurant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 197

You deserved it 3 202

By dmachin - 08/02/2010 19:30 - France

Today, I visited my grandmother who has dementia. She thought I was my father, and told me that I should never have married my mother, let alone have had children with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 132

You deserved it 2 133

Next

Top comments

elchiclebubalu 2

Wednesday 17 February 2010 15:54

I thinks she wants u to pass on the legacy. Fyl.

Gvil_Eenius 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 15:54

That really blows! lmao

Comments

elchiclebubalu 2

Wednesday 17 February 2010 15:54

I thinks she wants u to pass on the legacy. Fyl.

xxjona777xx 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 16:02

YDI for having a slutty granny

Bl4ck_1c3 2

Wednesday 17 February 2010 16:50

#1 wins so much

iSwag 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 17:26

she didn't mention my name did she? I told that bitch to keep her mouth shut >:-/ ...j/p ur grandma was awesome :D

thor89 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 21:30

G.I.L.F

ohmygeezz 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 21:34

mmm the good ole days =D

goodstuffboro 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 23:34

hmmm "iswag" u got sum sexxii ass lips....juss ta let u kno....op that's gotta suck bigtime....maybe u could tell her about YOUR life a a secret agent prostitute/history teacher??? give u guys some common ground maybe

WHODATNATION 0

Thursday 18 February 2010 2:17

Is ur grandma Granny Klump?

wizerds67 0

Thursday 18 February 2010 4:42

nice hair :D (serious no sarcasm intended) to the op, LUCKY I wish my grandma was a *****!

c0nfuzzled 0

Thursday 18 February 2010 6:00

lol, u make my day/night once again perdix

infinitii 0

Thursday 18 February 2010 7:01

I'd hit that yo

naza517 0

Thursday 18 February 2010 7:02

wats up with all the grandmother fml????

thetink 0

Sunday 7 March 2010 4:06

@ 65 love your hair

fizzymonsterman 0

Wednesday 21 April 2010 7:58

win bigtime^^^^

Thabb 0

Wednesday 5 May 2010 4:43

YDI for listening. Anti flood -_-

melikesfml 11

Tuesday 24 April 2012 6:09

You could be a **** grand baby!

283leis 8

Wednesday 3 October 2012 3:36

Wow that reminds me of something simillar. One of the guys from my friend's catholic school was telling us how one of their teachers did **** whilst in university...by any chance you don't go to Holy Cross in Woodbridge, Ontario, Canada?

Gvil_Eenius 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 15:54

That really blows! lmao

Tripout 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 16:22

literally XD ^^^^^^^

ImaginaryFoe 0

Thursday 18 February 2010 3:44

Win! ^^^^^^^

sasonzal 4

Wednesday 17 February 2010 15:54

how old is she,anything like a milf or just old?

xundria 5

Wednesday 17 February 2010 16:18

not a milf... a gilf... granny I'd like to ****, duhhh get it right

Bbhd05 0

Wednesday 21 September 2011 22:01

Oh baby.

KurouTenshi 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 15:55

it's good to know and get in touch with your roots :D

Starfire22 5

Wednesday 17 February 2010 17:21

soon her grandfather will confess to being her grandmothers pimp back in the 30s :D

KurouTenshi 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 17:34

Grandpas always had a powerful pimp and and now you know why.

xoppx 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 16:03

maybe you could learn a thing or two

epictrollathon 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 16:07

Grandparents have the coolest stories!

CallMeHush 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 16:11

No FML unless you ran to the bathroom to rub one out afterwards.

Prestigex 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 16:12

Win.

ImTrEvOr 8

Wednesday 17 February 2010 16:16

FYL lmao I woulda killed myself

tsoccerdude 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 16:27

well u shuld be happy ur grandma was a prostitute bc thts prob y ur here today

NeonWar__ 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 16:57

true dat (:

tsoccerdude 0

Thursday 18 February 2010 2:51

exactly

PsychoMerk 0

Wednesday 17 February 2010 16:29

does it run in the family? ;)

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8

Keywords

Gamers Annoying Video games Abuse Birthday Relatable Scams Social Media Money Kids School Education Parents Public freakouts Health Mental health Grieving Geek Music Poopoo peepee Awkward Jewelry Bikes Transportation Cops Fight Family Work Gross Customers

The Top

Today, and every time I try to talk to my mother about being a lesbian, she just says in the most condescending way, "Oh no you're not sweetie, it’s just a phase." The "phase" has lasted 17 years, including marrying my wife and adopting twin sons, but sure, it’s “just a phase.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 731

You deserved it 229

Today, I just learned that the silly song my parents taught me as a small child, and would sometimes make me sing for the family, is actually a very thinly veiled series of penis jokes. Why just now? Because I hadn't thought about it for years, until my grandma brought it up at a reunion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 390

You deserved it 74

The Top

Today, I got my period. I was going to have my first threesome tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 111

You deserved it 486

Today, I panicked when I felt a hard bump on the side of my stomach. I thought I had appendicitis. Turns out it was my ab muscles. I've been overweight so long I didn't know what they felt like. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 390

You deserved it 27 248

Today, my wife informed me her wallet was stolen from her unlocked car in our driveway. Three weeks ago, she misplaced her credit card that has all the monthly charges and Amazon tied to it. We've talked a lot about importance of locking her car, and she's constantly looking for her credit cards, license, etc. FML

I agree, your life sucks 976

You deserved it 390

Today, I woke up on the floor with my feet still in the bed. I had passed out while vomiting into a bucket, since I couldn't make it to the bathroom in time. The bucket had spilled all over my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 451

You deserved it 614

Today, my girlfriend and I were both at home, sick. We decided to make the best of it and spent the day in bed together. Things got a little steamy, and we started making out. As I started kissing her neck, I got nauseous. Before I could pull away, I threw up all over her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 425

You deserved it 18 100

Today, and for the past two weeks, my teacher hasn't taken a class, saying that she doesn't want to teach a class as loud as ours. When she does teach, it's near impossible to hear her over the yelling of other students. I checked the syllabus for an exam and it has two topics that she didn't cover. The exam is in two days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 155

You deserved it 178