Miscellaneous: Self report

Self report

By banana12321 - 02/04/2015 04:40 - United States - Fresno

Today, I thought I had gotten away with throwing a party while my folks were gone the night before. They came home and I was as sweet as possible. I could tell they were not buying it, but I thought I was in the clear. Later, they told me I had drunk-dialled them and spilled the beans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 204

You deserved it 30 468

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Same thing different taste

By Werner - 02/03/2009 21:04 - United States

Today, I came home after a party to my parents, who confronted me. They said that my phone had made a pocket call to them and they heard a good half hour of people talking about drugs and alcohol. I confessed at that point. I checked my phone after. I hadn't called them in 3 days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 653

You deserved it 67 482

By SDCore - 12/02/2015 00:40 - United States - Glenview

Today, I got drunk at a party. I didn't want my parents to know, so I took out my phone, called my parents, and asked them not to tell them I'm drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 831

You deserved it 39 893

PARTAY!

By Life of the party - 19/08/2009 05:13 - France

Today, I threw a party while my parents were gone. I forgot that our alarm automatically turns on at 11 pm, so when people opened the door, it went off. I couldn't find the number for the alarm company, so the cops showed up. Everyone started cheering because they thought they were strippers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 875

You deserved it 55 843

By brizzle - 05/04/2009 20:15 - United States

Today, my parents came home after being out of town for the weekend. I stayed home, did homework and completely cleaned the house, thinking I could earn some brownie points with them. They saw how clean the house was and accused me of covering up a party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87 463

You deserved it 6 353

Caught in 4K

By its_all_legit - 19/03/2009 03:47 - United States

Today, my parents, who are out of town but driving back tomorrow, called to see how I was doing. They asked if I'd thrown a party in their absence, and I said no. My dad replied, "Well I'm currently looking at pictures on Facebook of our kitchen with beer and a bong on the table." FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 461

You deserved it 127 815

By Anonymous - 10/01/2014 02:45 - Sri Lanka

Today, my parents used my going away party as a cover up for my sister's surprise party. I didn't know until they brought out the cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 354

You deserved it 3 354

Self report

By Anonymous - 25/05/2009 14:55 - United States

Today, I snuck out of my house in the middle of the night. I ran into my dad carrying wine into another house. I didn't assume he was cheating until he saw me and said, "I won't tell if you don't tell, please don't tell your mother." FML

I agree, your life sucks 87 025

You deserved it 5 525

By ugh - 15/07/2013 11:46 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, after my parents left for the weekend, my "friends" decided to throw a party at my house, despite my protests. In order to get them to leave, I called the police. I was the only one arrested, while they got warnings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 783

You deserved it 9 146

By Michelle - 15/08/2011 08:15 - United States

Today, my parents heard me leaving my room at 2 am, and freaked out because they thought I was sneaking out. I was too embarrassed to tell them that I was getting food instead of having a social life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 203

You deserved it 23 184

By Suprise - 17/08/2013 04:38 - United States

Today, as I returned home, I noticed some movement inside my house. Thinking it was a break-in, I called 911. It was my friends and some coworkers trying to throw me a surprise birthday party. Nobody's said a word to me since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 079

You deserved it 8 932

wolfstar126 25

Thursday 2 April 2015 15:20

You're a special kind of stupid aren't you?

Mightyrif 23

Thursday 2 April 2015 15:24

YDI, plain and simple.

Comments

joe3_fml 15

Thursday 2 April 2015 15:38

At least you didn't drunk dial your girlfriend. Or anything like that.

MELKOZAR 27

Thursday 2 April 2015 15:59

That's nice!

chocolatelover96 14

Thursday 2 April 2015 15:59

So drunk you is a more decent person than sober you? o_0

Scryll 17

Thursday 2 April 2015 16:04

My boss is that kind of person

lazyslumber 18

Thursday 2 April 2015 16:02

You could have said April Fool for believing you on the phone!

Purexinsanity 46

Thursday 2 April 2015 16:23

I would say hope the party was worth it because you'll probably be grounded from quite a while but it seems you can't even remember it.

Norja 33

Thursday 2 April 2015 16:26

I didn't even finish reading before I hit YDI.

fishybull 15

Thursday 2 April 2015 16:34

always always allllwwaayyys leave the phone OFF

FrontRowSquad 8

Thursday 2 April 2015 16:53

Mother Teresa knows best

joelp232 17

Thursday 2 April 2015 17:24

well at least the party went good right?

SydLovesLacey 18

Thursday 2 April 2015 17:51

You can only blame yourself buddy.

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The Top

Today, I came home from work to see a pair of panties I hadn't worn lying on the floor. I picked them up and they were all crunchy. It turns out that while I'm away, my boyfriend uses my underwear as a vessel for his semen. He claims this is normal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 398

You deserved it 363

Ahoy ship's boys and girls ! Today we're heading to France. Be ready to face rain, storm and beer because Lille is welcoming us, and believe me, it's not Los Angeles. Do you all have your raincoats? -Bonjour ! First of all, present yourself ma jol...

I agree, your life sucks 5

You deserved it 6

The Top

Today, while visiting family, we went to a restaurant to eat. Towards the end of the meal, I went to use the restroom. When I came back, everyone was gone. Everyone had actually gotten into their cars and left without me. I have no idea where I am and no one is answering their phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 762

You deserved it 4 765

Today, I was so desperate for someone to talk to I called various restaurants pretending to be interested in ordering food, just so I could have a conversation. I called eleven different places. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 002

You deserved it 834

Today, I was taking a dump and I pushed so hard that I got light headed and passed out on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 320

You deserved it 14 182

Today, I woke up feeling ecstatic, because last night, my crush had told my best friend he likes me a lot. I sent him a text message telling him the feeling is mutual. A little while after sending it, it hit me that his confession had only been part of a dream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 197

You deserved it 7 589

Today, I went shopping with my sister’s husband to help him choose a birthday gift for her. My sister’s insane friend saw us, followed us, and caused a huge screaming scene in the middle of the mall accusing us of having an affair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 024

You deserved it 297

Today, I was written up at work and sent home 20 minutes into my shift. My boss thought I was under the influence of something, but it’s really just the first time I’ve come to work with no makeup on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 502

You deserved it 365

Self report

Same thing different taste

PARTAY!

Caught in 4K

Self report

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