Weird, Fight, Public freakouts and Kids: Roaming gangs - FML

Roaming gangs

By 23yearoldtoddler - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was jumped and savagely beaten to the ground by a group of six-year-olds wearing Disney princess masks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 004

You deserved it 6 762

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

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Same thing different taste

Rough

By aarone23 - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was slammed onto my car, thrown on the ground, and arrested for outstanding warrants from 1979. I was born in 1992. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 265

You deserved it 4 135

By Bareassed - 29/07/2009 04:13 - United States

Today, I was at a water park with my family. They wanted me to stand underneath this big bucket filled with water. I didn't know it tips over, and my swimsuit isn't the tightest, so when all the water fell down, my swimsuit bottoms fell to my knees in front of tons of kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 620

You deserved it 12 943

Family tradition

By Anonymous - 28/07/2022 03:00 - United Kingdom - Norwich

Today, I woke up to find both my sisters standing over me. One of them punched me in the balls, then dragged me out of bed by my feet. The other poured a jug of ice cold water over me, while the other kicked me in the balls again, from behind this time. They yelled, "Happy birthday." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 236

You deserved it 127

No good deed…

By williebees - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Huntsville

Today, as I was about to walk across the street, a girl in front of me who clearly wasn't paying attention to the traffic, almost got run over. I grabbed her arm and jumped back. She was fine. I fell and fractured my arm and wrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 908

You deserved it 2 499

Record breakers

By fatmom - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Royal Tunbridge Wells

Today, I came home from work to find my son and his friends attempting to find out how many of them could fit into one of my pairs of pants. So far, five. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 580

You deserved it 21 556

Rewind time

By supersmashpika - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Hershey

Today, while walking down the street, a truck hit a puddle and splashed me with water. After I cursed and flipped him off, he put his truck in reverse and splashed me again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 663

You deserved it 9 980

WHO ARE YOU?

By Targeted - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Kirkland

Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 174

You deserved it 2 890

By reallyhighschool - 03/12/2013 16:34 - United States - Torrance

Today, I got nominated to sit in a chair in the middle of the gym during a high school rally while the entire school got to throw paper balls at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 979

You deserved it 4 662

You snooze, you lose

By propose_you_freakin_coward - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I was insulted and harassed by my sister and her boyfriend, all because I proposed yesterday. They were angry I might get married before they did. They have known each other since primary school; I met my fiancée earlier this year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 910

You deserved it 6 838

Suspect

By Anonymous - 01/08/2009 04:30 - United States

Today, I went for a run. I ended up being tackled by two cops, handcuffed, and dragged to the station with no explanation. Turns out a house nearby had been robbed and the best description they got was, "A man running." I didn't even get an apology. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 390

You deserved it 2 848

Next

Top comments

shift_love 13

Friday 18 May 2012 18:28

You should have offered them a poison apple or something and plays the part of the haggard villain

wannagofast 3

Friday 18 May 2012 18:30

And they lived happily ever after

Comments

kthsdm 12

Saturday 19 May 2012 3:55

Oh the horror... Those damn video games!

iHeartRKO 5

Saturday 19 May 2012 5:28

That's a knee slapper

BunchieRules 31

Saturday 19 May 2012 6:46

When I read the first half of that sentence, I first pictured a dark alleyway in Detroit. Then I read the rest, and instantly thought of Disneyworld. Evidently they don't mix well!

sleet7 4

Saturday 19 May 2012 6:57

YDI for being weak. You are pathetic.

JBMcC 7

Saturday 19 May 2012 7:38

Disney has something for everyone: toys for the kids, vacations for adults, and princess masks for teenagers to wear while they beat the crap out of you.

chokefrantic 9

Saturday 19 May 2012 7:52

6 year olds? Please, they were the Midget Mafia.

sellout39 0

Saturday 19 May 2012 11:23

sound like some savage young looking midgets to me ...you should probably tell the story like that otherwise you kind of sound pathetic..sorry OP

shaggan 6

Saturday 19 May 2012 13:04

All I need a couple cans of pop and the kids around here would kill for me sounds like a hit Bro

ppiluk 4

Saturday 19 May 2012 13:47

Pics or it didn't happen!

nictransitglory 4

Saturday 19 May 2012 14:00

Did they also make you lick white dog shit?

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, my wife made me a Sex Rewards Chart, where I get points by doing chores and such, and 50 points gets me some action. She refuses to even look at me if I haven't earned the points, and is contemplating sleeping alone in the guest room until I earn more points. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 097

You deserved it 20 811

Today, I met up with a guy from Bumble for a first date. An hour in, he asks me, "What's your take on body odor?" He proceeds to tell me about his intimate relationship with his body odor and how his armpits take on the scents of his lovers' lady bits. He added that the "essence" of his ex often returns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 509

You deserved it 71

The Top

Today, as I was pulling wire for an addition to my boss's house, I was on a ladder drilling a hole when my coworker kicked the ladder out from under me and left me hanging from a rafter twenty feet in the air. To make matters worse, I had to pee. I'm now in my car with dead arms and wet pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 941

You deserved it 517

Today, my son said his first word. Unfortunately, that word was "cock." I've tried convincing myself that he's trying to say "clock" but I just can't do it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 237

You deserved it 7 763

Today, I learned that the only way to get my boyfriend to respond to me is through nudes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 739

You deserved it 6 492

Today, my husband asked what I’d done all day. I took it as a criticism and was about to chew his head off about not appreciating all I do, when I took a look at myself still in pyjamas, the filthy house, dirty plates, and unwashed laundry and realised I’ve done fuck all for weeks. I’m a bad wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 307

You deserved it 1 604

Today, I drove from Seattle, WA to Vancouver, BC for the Three Days Grace concert. I was so excited when I found the building. There was a big readerboard that flashed "THREE DAYS GRACE" and I cheered. Then it flashed "CANCELLED." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 997

You deserved it 7 404

Today, I was made aware that my teenage son used "Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter" as a reference point in a class debate as if it was a biopic. Oh dear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 593

You deserved it 2 911