Customers, Weird and Work: Paranoid

Paranoid

By MaddyN - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Forest Grove

Today, I almost got fired from work because a customer complained that I "threw up gang signs" at him. I was blocking the sun from my eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 034

You deserved it 3 520

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Bad hair day

By Tony - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff

Today, I was fired for having a haircut that was 'inappropriate for the workplace'. I have alopecia. My boss told me to stop making up excuses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 314

You deserved it 2 637

Meritocracy

By blue - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was put on notice at work due to my "anger problem." Apparently, sighing in a meeting means you'll be labeled as someone with a short temper. However, the creepy stalker guy is on the fast track to management. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 944

You deserved it 3 189

Welcome back

By pixie_pix13 - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, I came back to work after being out for a week. As I walked to the back of the store, I threw my hands up and yelled, "I'm back bitches". Right after I said it, I noticed my boss was behind me. I was then taken to the office and wrote up for foul language on my first day back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 067

You deserved it 3 399

I'm confused

By confusedbagel - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my boss fired me for being "too morally ambiguous". I work at a bagel shop and had told a customer that I was indifferent towards cream cheese. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 499

You deserved it 4 083

Running late

By SMV - This FML is from back in 2008 but it's good stuff - France

Today, my company was having a huge party so I went to work dressed in my best outfit. During lunch break, my boss said to me, "You really missed out on something yesterday, it was great fun!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 243

You deserved it 6 076

Rewind time

By supersmashpika - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Hershey

Today, while walking down the street, a truck hit a puddle and splashed me with water. After I cursed and flipped him off, he put his truck in reverse and splashed me again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 663

You deserved it 9 980

Dogsbody

By tee - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Kansas City

Today, I was told it was inconvenient for me to take lunch breaks, because someone else has to answer the phones and no one else wants to actually do any work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 883

You deserved it 2 012

There was an attempt…

By JoshTheUnluckyFromKentucky - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Folsom

Today, I got on the bus to go to work. I managed to get a seat, but an old lady who looked tired had to stand. I offered her my seat, but she glared at me, frowned and said, "Go fuck yourself." Everyone laughed as I sat there in dismay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 639

You deserved it 2 920

Stoner in disguise

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Rowlett

Today, I found out that mishearing my boss and laughing at what I thought he said can make him think I'm high and nearly force me to submit to a drug test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 429

You deserved it 2 920

Right back!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, while I was eating spicy wings, I suddenly sneezed. I was sitting in front of a fan and effectively maced myself when my spicy sneeze blew back into my face and eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 400

You deserved it 908

CrikOgresmasher 19

Tuesday 8 July 2014 11:36

I once was accused of being a Nazi for the same reason

PiinkVanilla 15

Tuesday 8 July 2014 11:35

Next time, block the sun with your middle finger. That'll really impress! :D

Comments

91hayek 31

Tuesday 8 July 2014 11:53

Oregon gang signs - not even once.

aimzskee 30

Tuesday 8 July 2014 11:58

Things like this make me not want to live on this planet anymore.

NYM88 26

Tuesday 8 July 2014 12:36

I hear they are looking for people to go to Mars, did you volunteer yet?

aimzskee 30

Tuesday 8 July 2014 13:16

I was thinking more Venus, actually.

RedPillSucks 31

Tuesday 8 July 2014 17:03

How about Uranus?

aimzskee 30

Wednesday 9 July 2014 13:59

Nah, I hear Uranus has been explored many times before.

Soundslikeothers 15

Tuesday 8 July 2014 12:08

Your boss must really value his employees if all it takes is one idiot customers complaint to get you fired.

xmaan667 15

Tuesday 8 July 2014 12:19

The customer must have been in a rival gang.

salvorican 24

Tuesday 8 July 2014 12:21

So the real question is.... Blood or Crip?

thatguy021 14

Tuesday 8 July 2014 12:58

Some people are too stupid for life...

JMor52 7

Tuesday 8 July 2014 13:05

So you were throwing gang signs, you rep the sun block.

Mr_Mole 24

Tuesday 8 July 2014 13:16

That's what all crips say.

leeloo900 9

Tuesday 8 July 2014 13:19

Haha, what the hell? Sorry this made me laugh. Gang signs, really? C'mon -.-"

beaverteaser 16

Tuesday 8 July 2014 13:19

should have told him your gangs name is the Westside fuzzy bunnies

Keywords

Management Work Jealousy Love Relatable Mental health Relationship advice Miscellaneous Friends Awkward Health Healthy Lifestyle Ironic Food Birthday Family Money Gifts Mother in law Parents Public freakouts Education Students Exams Pranks Weird Argument AITA Insects Fear

The Top

...

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 4

Today, after having sexual intercourse with my boyfriend, we went downstairs to find his parents had come home early and had heard everything. I then received a long scolding from his mother of how I'd disrespected her house. My boyfriend received a high-five and a thumbs-up from his dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 025

You deserved it 5 457

The Top

Today, I got a Facebook message from a guy from my old school. I didn’t remember him, but I replied anyway. When I checked my phone after work, I had 73 new messages that went from, “How have you been?” to, “Fuck you ugly cockteasing whore,” and ended with, “You better hope I don’t catch you!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 467

You deserved it 178

Today, I ran for editor-in-chief of a magazine. I spent hours working on my speech, and offered a bunch of new ideas to increase readership. My opponent just said that she, "loved the organization". I lost by a 4-1 margin. My opponent later announced her plans for next year. They were all of my ideas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 728

You deserved it 2 364

Today, according to daycare, my son is behind in his potty training curriculum because we are not "celebrating his natural bodily functions" enough. He turned 2 a week ago, and he peed on our bed last night because we're trying to meet this demand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 503

You deserved it 2 999

Today, I realised that I keep both Naruto collecting cards and a condom in the same pocket of my wallet. Nothing says sexy quite like dropping a bunch of Gaara cards before getting it on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 317

You deserved it 1 138

Today, I thought my dad was finally showing interest in the business I started last year when he asked about my next event. Nope, he just wanted to know if I would hire his step-granddaughter. Her first question: "So, I won't have to do any like, real work right?" Gee, thanks Dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 353

You deserved it 2 313

Today, I recently graduated from high school and I went to a college party. I met these girls and told them I graduated college already, to sound cool. I then heard one of them say, "I went to middle school with you, and I was in your math class." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 521

You deserved it 61 982

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Comments