Work: No excuses!

No excuses!

By davka - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff

Today, I was fired from my job. Apparently getting shot is no valid reason to stay home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 964

You deserved it 4 893

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Top comments

khaya 9

Monday 18 April 2011 19:10

Stab wounds only accepted. Company policy, don't fight it.

cathylee22 4

Monday 18 April 2011 19:11

ummm wow what were you doing the night before that resulted in you being shot?

Comments

camking619 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 4:12

thats just a flesh wound... grow a pair

SwaggerMelon 6

Tuesday 19 April 2011 4:15

I see what you did there with fired and shot OP... nice one

chessyragoo 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 4:25

at least u ain't dead haha

lolwtfdidiread 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 4:43

-_-

emsiti 6

Tuesday 19 April 2011 4:44

if he was shot with a bullet fhl if a bb gun he diserves it they hurt and break skin can kill but rarely man up chump

drdna 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 4:57

thug life

siilvr 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 6:10

LMFAOOO

tada1234 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 5:32

well do you know who shot you? it could be your boss...

1970chevelless 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 5:32

lawsuit? id already be looking into it

Tempo9093 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 5:38

wow thats fuckt up

tcrunit 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 5:44

sue their asses for all they have

Keywords

Weird Miscellaneous Awkward Shopping My ex Family Relatable Racism Love Kids AITA Cheating Work Break-ups Animals Cats Cute Sex Intimacy Relationship advice Alcohol Coworkers Health Psychology Mental health Neighbours Cops Stressed out Parents Scary

The Top

Today, I was running to my car, slipped, and slammed my head on the car door. I started driving to the hospital because it was bleeding profusely and I was dizzy, I called my mom to tell her what had happened. She said I was grounded for "goofing off" and that she was "sick of my shit". FML

I agree, your life sucks 98 339

You deserved it 7 901

Today, I asked a girl from Bumble for a full body pic. She was obese, so I told her it wasn’t gonna work. She then sent a video of her in real time looking slim and told me that picture was from when she was obese, and she'd sent that picture as a “test of my character” and she’s “better off without someone so judgy.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 225

You deserved it 945

The Top

Today, I mentioned to my wife that we should try marriage counseling. She responded by denying it while throwing a carton of milk at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 042

You deserved it 3 076

Today, at work while everyone else was at lunch, my boss's sister-in-law called. Realizing I was manning the phones alone, she immediately asked, "Oh, is everyone of importance gone to lunch?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 888

You deserved it 78

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate. It was his first time, which I guess explains him sticking his hand down my panties and practically bitch-slapping my vagina for the next 20 or 30 seconds. I stupidly faked an orgasm just to get him to stop. Now he thinks he's some kind of sex god. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 321

You deserved it 34 484

Today, I was following my girlfriend up the stairs, I was pretty sure I was going to get lucky. As I was almost up the set of stairs, she lifted her skirt and revealed to me that she wasn't wearing any panties. I fell backwards down the stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 005

You deserved it 21 051

Today, I woke up to find my best friend lying down and unresponsive. Frightened, I tapped on the glass. He got scared and started swimming again. My best friend is a fish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 583

You deserved it 7 204

Today, my girlfriend told me what turns her on: cheese. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 173

You deserved it 2 819