Mystery

By Anonymous - 17/07/2016 14:51 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband had a vasectomy several years ago. I've been faithful the whole time, but he wouldn't believe me, even after I showed him that vasectomies can reverse themselves. FML
I agree, your life sucks 16 805
You deserved it 1 980

Same thing different taste

Top comments

You can hardly blame him, though, can you? You may have to get a paternity test to straighten this out.

hopefully he doesnt leave you OP, when the baby is born theres always paternity tests

Comments

ChildhoodTerror 11

As a biology student I can confirm the fact that vasectomy reversal is real. The only way he is for certain sterile is if his testes (balls) where removed surgically! Otherwise the vas deferens can essentially "grow back" making a man fertile again after a vasectomy without knowing. If these facts don't convince him have him get a sperm count to prove his fertility then when your child is born have a genetic test with samples of both parents to prove his relation to the child. Also he probably needs to have the vasectomy redone. Perhaps this'll be an interesting story to tell your kid when it's older.

Unless they have absolutely no desire for children, then no. It's not interesting so much as depressing.

I know someone who felt worthless and unwanted and like the world didn't need or want him because his mum had her tubes tied when she fell pregnant with him. So it's not really an interesting story to tell the kid, could crush them that they defied odds and theoretically shouldn't be here.

Sorry to hear OP about what you're going through. I think unfortunately and initially just about any man in this situation would automatically think cheating. Just because this is rare. Obviously not unheard of though. Hopefully things calm down and you can get whatever necessary medical texting done to wash away any doubts.

You can get medical advice and procedures done through texting now? That is so cool!

pharmalady 10

If you want ghetto, you can't go wrong with Jerry Springer.

I'm sorry for this ordeal OP. I can see your husband's point of view, but you can always try the things mentioned above to prove that the baby is his/he's still fertile. I hope you both do what's best for you two, and remember that your decision is yours alone, so nobody should tell you what you should or shouldn't do with the fetus. Do what feels right. I hope things go over as smooth as they can.

megunn 1

Just FYI, since I didn't see this mentioned so far in the comments, there is actually now the option of safe genetic testing that can now be done prior to birth. Those tests are considerably more expensive than the standard cheek swab variety you'd do on a baby, but there are instances where they can be worth it, and it sounds like this might be one of them. Vasectomies aren't quite as black and white a thing as most people would like to think, unfortunately. While it's probably still the first thing to try, unless you're very recently pregnant, a sperm count done now wouldn't necessarily show whether he was fertile at the actual time of conception, because the sperm count could have drastically changed between then and now.

Chances are they didn't. 4 weeks post conception and my hubby's sperm count was just as high as they were the day we got pregnant. Which mind you was the one time in the entire month of February we had sex. Sperm counts only change drastically if there is something wrong. Not saying a reversed vasectomy isn't one of them. But there are many other alternatives to reversal. It's possible they were still within the fertile window after a vasectomy. Which means you should still be practicing all BC methods until the doctor deems you as all clear. Hell OP's hubby could have an extra tube in his sac. All is possible. My husband was clipped snipped and cauterized. His reversal was due to them not snipping enough.

I feel you OP. I'm 21 weeks pregnant with a 5 year post vasectomy baby. They are not full proof. The only form of birth control that is, is abstinence. Honestly first have your hubby go get his sperm count checked and if he has swimmers that show squash a lot of doubt. And if all else fails there is are patenting options. There even test that you can get while the fetus is still growing including but not limited to an amniocentesis. (Though an amnio comes with an increased risk of miscarriage) Also don't feel bad if you need support I'm here. I'm literally in your shoes. & though I can't blame your hubby for his doubt trust me vasectomy reversals are more common than what ppl realize just google "pregnancy after vasectomy." Again message me if you need me OP

Good luck getting your trust in him back when the paternity test shows him how badly he's failed you :-(

Wilko = Fights Jerry = White trash/ Trailer park Maury = Ghetto/Ratchet

goream2013 6

My uncle got a vasectomy after his second child, then some months later my aunt found out she was pregnant. They were absolutely shocked, considering they tried multiple times and went through 3 miscarriages before they had their first 2 children. Anyways it was his and now they have 3 healthy babies. he's 6 now. I believe that when things are meant to happen they will find a way. Even through less than 1% odds. Fate really wanted him to be here.