Health, Cute and Skincare: Manly man

Manly man

By takinabreak - 10/07/2009 17:03 - United States

Today, I was taking a shower and I saw a new body wash that said "Radiance Ribbons." That sounded a little effeminate, but it smelled manly enough and the only alternative was normal soap, so I used it. Just now, I stepped out into the sun and found out what "Radiance Ribbons" means. I sparkle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 903

You deserved it 33 567

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Same thing different taste

Glitterati

By Anonymous - 22/03/2023 12:00

Today, my girlfriend and her friends mocked my "fragile masculinity" because I bought men's body wash instead of sharing her body wash. Her body wash is full of glitter, which irritates my skin horribly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 871

You deserved it 113

By soapgirl - 13/08/2009 16:07 - Philippines

Today, my mom was gifted with a toiletry basket. I grabbed the lotion and used it without asking. When I went out, it began raining hard. I got wet and noticed my skin got very sticky. Turns out the lotion was actually body wash. People were wondering why soap bubbles were coming from my skin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 426

You deserved it 65 009

By Anonymous - 21/06/2019 04:30

Today, I sparkled because of this glitter bar my mother got me from Lush. I didn't realize until after I got out of the shower that it wasn't just ordinary soap. I tried to wipe off the glitter. It wouldn't come off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 630

You deserved it 276

Tasty snack

By Anonymous - 16/07/2023 11:00 - United States - Chesterfield

Today, I showered with my favorite soaps, and I used my favorite perfumes and lotions too. I layered my scents to get a nice fruity, girly scent, which helps boosts my confidence. My husband walked in the bedroom when I was done and said that it smelled like cheesy garlic bread. FML

I agree, your life sucks 648

You deserved it 413

Fancy a snatch? A *snack, sorry.

By Crabcake - 21/09/2017 19:30 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, my husband bought a luxury soap that smells like lemons. Now, every time I wash my private parts in the shower, it smells like a special at Red Lobster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 148

You deserved it 953

By Anonyme - 27/03/2015 09:50 - France - Laill

Today, when I woke up, I got into the bath that my boyfriend had prepared for me. I particularly appreciated its smell, so I asked him what he'd used. "I couldn't find the usual bath salts you use, so I just used what I could." It's official, I've taken a Alka-Seltzer flavored bath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 816

You deserved it 3 474

By miss tomato - 08/06/2012 16:36 - United States

Today, I was really badly sunburnt, so I put on some after-sun. The only type we have has glitter in it, and now I look like a sparkling tomato. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 498

You deserved it 5 666

By SummersEve - 12/02/2010 00:47 - United States

Today, I found out the crappy shampoo I've been borrowing from my girlfriend is actually "feminine wash." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 721

You deserved it 33 325

By IB6UB9 - 28/11/2009 17:32 - United States

Today, I woke up and looked in the mirror and noticed that my face was covered in glitter. I asked my wife about it and she said she put it on me while I was sleeping so that I would sparkle like Edward from Twilight when I'm in the sunlight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 161

You deserved it 6 974

By chapstick - 09/01/2014 03:23 - United States - San Dimas

Today, my lips were dry and chapped, so I asked if I could use some of my friend's chapstick. She didn't mind, so I quickly put some on. Only later did I notice that my lips were sparkly. Turns out it was glitter balm. Now everyone calls me "princess." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 889

You deserved it 13 690

barroomhero 0

Friday 10 July 2009 23:05

It's okay, every girl who sees you will jump you.

Fml37 0

Friday 10 July 2009 23:06

You don't sparkle, you flame :p

Comments

kyasariin 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 0:13

So you can now say that you're a gay vampire!!!!! CONGRATULATIONS EDWARD WANNABEEE!!!! Maybe now, you can come out of the closet so Robert wtfhislastnameis doesn't have to. Maybe he'll thank you. (:

gonzi_fml 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 0:13

dude I read this FML and immediately thought of Edward Cullen XDDDD

moony_fml 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 0:15

"how to become a sparkly fake vampire for dummies"

breatheinandout 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 0:19

OP: LOL um, at least you stand out in the crowd. :) and i don't think it's just fangirls who'll turn their head to look at you, but everyone else who just happens to see you SPARKLE.

summersong89 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 0:19

i like the Twilight books but in my opinion, vampire men should NOT sparkle/shimmer! it's not sexy, or manly. hahah #107 that sucks for you OP.

AnaMaree 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 0:20

That's good. Now you can attract Twilight fans.

sarah2144 14

Saturday 11 July 2009 0:21

Oh dear. Unfortunately, having Twihards following you around is not a good thing. They are generally all insane if they'll follow someone who sparkles. Good luck. Be sure to kick them if they do.

mikew85 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 0:21

that sucks. I wouldve assumed it just meant it moisturized or something.

pet_virus 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 0:21

My mate did this but with sun cream, he had to come in for an exam. It was funny

Pamina128 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 0:26

What's with bashing twilight fans? I like Twilight, but I'm not completely obsessed with it and I'm certainly not stupid as some people have said. Sure, some fans are completely way over the top about it, but keep in mind not all of them are.

ohhdamn 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 2:10

me too, edward/ bella are a lil' obsessed with each other but, it's a cool series. i do with the obsessors would shut the **** up and quit making me loook bad though D=

americayay 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 5:56

Lol. Gotta agree. I like the books and am looking forward to the next movie, but the creepily obsessed people do make the normally interested people look very bad.