Jingle bells

By LonelyThisChristmas - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Birmingham

Today, my stepmum told me that the Christmas dinner she is cooking tomorrow will cost £25 a head. I laughed because I thought she was joking. She wasn't. Now I'm spending Christmas alone. FML
I agree, your life sucks 8 648
You deserved it 781

Top comments

£25 for what I'm assuming is a family Christmas dinner is just ******. You're better off not going.

...well, it's the best way to spend it, no drama!

Comments

I don't actually see a big problem. In our family, everyone brings something, someone brings the meat, someone the salad etc, and eventually we will calculate the costs and make it even. There is no reason for one of us to pay so much more, or in your case, for your step-mom to spend all the money on a big dinner. She could have worded it better and discussed it with all of you beforehand, but I think it is entirely reasonable to want to share the costs. If it is a big and fancy dinner, it is going to cost a lot.

If you don't get any say in what the dinner IS, then you don't have to pitch in to cover costs. And if stepmom is charging that much per person, she is either trying to make a profit or has planned a stupid, stupid expensive dinner without anybody else in mind.

I think that (depending on the situation) asking for a contribution is fine. My family likes to gather on Christmas, but we come close to 50 people and tend to celebrate for two days (3 meals+games) so it's not just one family member saying 'hey, I'm inviting you to a meal at my place': it's pretty much an entire event. Sometimes we do a potluck, so it's free. Other times a few of my aunts will go out of their way to organize it, because they know it makes things easier for the rest of us. Things can cost a grand or more, so I think asking for 15-20 bucks is reasonable of them. And if #16's family have all decided together that that's the way they want to do things, I think that's fine too. That being said, my aunts always tell us in advance (so we know to contribute money rather than food, or make other plans if we don't want to), and if you're truly low on cash they'll let you pay later or go for free. I think the big problem with the post is that the mother invited OP but only told them about the cost the day before, and when he didn't have the money actually refused to let him in. Also, as someone said, if it was just one meal, she planned something extremely extravagant and expensive. She probably knew her step-son's financial condition, so it wasn't very thoughtful of him.

There's a big difference between "let's all share in terh work/expense of a family get together" and "if you want to attend this family get together I am in charge of it you have to pay me." And 25 pounds is a HELL of a lot. You can get lobster in a restaurant for that.

So then your own father made you pay to eat ?

Come and join me, I'm local to you. We've got turkey, booze and lots of cheese. Only £24.99 a head.

chessu 21

If this was agreed on beforehand that they were short of money this year, could everyone chip in a little etc., this would be absolutely fine. However, it seems like it was sprung on the OP last minute and they didn't have the money or they ended up having a fight over it etc., so they ended up not going, which I don't think is right. Traditionally, if you invite someone over, they're your guests and not expected to pay anything.

This is just sad, merry Christmas op

That sucks OP. Unless she's renting out a banquet hall or doing something extravagant there's no reason for anyone but her (& maybe her spouse) to pay. Even still it's expected that being the host will be expensive & if she can't handle the expenses herself then she should let someone else host.

Mortoli 30

thats bs but i would be too. on bright side you can take all the gifts you got for them back ^^

polsen4273 8

Tape a penny to a card for her gift next year

If you have a large family and money is short, there's nothing wrong with asking each member to bring along some food, if she is renting a place or organizing a restaurant for the gathering, asking everyone to pitch in shouldn't be a problem, did you decide not to go because you didn't have 25$ or was it the concept of paying for food whilst spending time with your family that put you off?

<p>I'd be having dinner with someone else.</p>