Embarrassing, Shopping, Awkward and Kids: It's true, though

It's true, though

By humiliated - 20/03/2016 11:54 - United Kingdom - London

Today, at the supermarket, I picked up a pack of toilet rolls, at which point my 5-year-old daughter turned to me and screamed, "A CLEAN BUTTHOLE IS A HAPPY BUTTHOLE!" in front of a dozen other people. I have no idea where she heard that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 133

You deserved it 2 359

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Same thing different taste

Amplified

By Anonymous - 01/09/2010 23:04 - United States

Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year-old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 575

You deserved it 4 370

By Bailey - 22/08/2010 06:58 - United States

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 748

You deserved it 14 092

Kids Say the Darndest Things

By Lolabunny - 21/08/2018 04:00 - United States - Anaheim

Today, I went grocery shopping with my 4-year-old after having some major bathroom issues. As I walked over to get bananas, she yelled out in the middle of the produce section, "DO YOU STILL HAVE DIARRHEA MOMMY?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 821

You deserved it 347

By super maman - 30/09/2014 03:08 - France - Montauban

Today, in a supermarket, my four-year-old son whispered to me, asking if the checkout lady was able to wash between her fat rolls. She heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 698

You deserved it 5 487

Stunned silence

By Anonymous - 20/12/2014 22:42 - United Kingdom - Cambridge

Today, my 7 year-old daughter loudly asked in the middle of a supermarket, "Mummy, what's a cunt?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 172

You deserved it 3 901

By sleepy - 23/05/2011 04:57 - United States

Today, as I was standing in the checkout line in a store, my six year-old daughter proudly announced to everyone that I fell asleep on the toilet last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 878

You deserved it 8 363

Paper-thin walls

By Lauren Davies - 17/09/2019 06:00

Today, I had to tell my 4 year-old, "I'm wiping my butt right now, I can't get you a drink. Please wait a minute." I distinctly heard my neighbor laughing through the bathroom window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 580

You deserved it 301

By anonymous - 28/07/2011 05:39 - United States

Today, my 4 year-old daughter's favorite expression became "shit balls." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 431

You deserved it 16 955

By Username - 17/03/2011 04:04

Today, my daughter went potty. Just as she always does, she came up to me and announced, "I flushed, and wiped, and shut the light off." Then she did something brand new. She covered my face with her hand and asked, "Do these fingers smell?" They did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 867

You deserved it 5 239

By Anonymous - 10/09/2015 01:15 - United States - Mountain View

Today, at a public restroom, I caught my extremely eco-friendly daughter, who was on her period, looking through the trash. When I asked why, she said, "Because I'm looking for pads to use. It'll mean less garbage." I then had to lecture her in the public restroom about health and hygiene. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 506

You deserved it 2 608

sp00derman 23

Monday 21 March 2016 0:06

well... she's right

B0RN_kRAZY 16

Monday 21 March 2016 0:07

She got that from the Charmin Ultra Plush toilet paper commercials... DUH

Comments

RopeRodent 4

Monday 21 March 2016 12:10

"A DIRTY BUTTHOLE IS A CRAPPY BUTTHOLE"

itsme82 18

Monday 21 March 2016 14:00

Op if it makes you feel any better my daughter went to the store with her dad when she was two. He would always call me sexy and I kept telling him to stop before the kid repeated it. So they go to the store and every woman they pass the kid says "sexy, sexy, sexy." He was so embarassed but I thought and still think it's pretty great. It happens.. Enjoy her while she's little. They grow up so fast.

MandieL 27

Monday 21 March 2016 19:03

I taught my Neice "sexy" when she was about 3. It was funny when she called inanimate objects sexy because she liked them.

Goblin182 26

Monday 21 March 2016 15:59

That's funny as hell.

nikkichanxoxo 20

Monday 21 March 2016 17:10

She might have just made it up, my kid says the weirdest shit and I'm pretty sure she made it up herself lol

awgxkaylaxx 11

Monday 21 March 2016 18:31

omg noo hahah

NotSoCoolKid 15

Monday 21 March 2016 23:38

At least she doesn't want it the other way around, you lucked out in a sense lol, still awkward tho

waleedma 18

Monday 21 March 2016 23:51

Can't argue with the logic!

EvilLittleMan 23

Tuesday 22 March 2016 3:05

(_(:)_) Either way you look at it, it looks like a happy ass.

Jwaye2 7

Tuesday 22 March 2016 4:14

Haha I would have pissed myself laughing if that was my kid, my goddaughter is bad for that. She remembers everything she hears and has no problem repeating it. Gotta be careful around that one.