Sex, Cops and Intimacy: Hello hello hello - FML

Hello hello hello

By Bonnie and Clyde - 08/05/2015 02:18 - United States - Humble

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I got busted by a cop for having sex in his car. When the cop sent us on our way, we went home and the garage was open, so we called the cops thinking someone was in the home. No one was in the house, and we got the same cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 079

You deserved it 9 337

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Same thing different taste

Straight to jail

By Miss bad decisions - 03/11/2023 22:00

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I got busted having public sex. In desperation, I promised the officer he could fuck me if he let us go. Now I've got an extra charge and probably an ex-boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73

You deserved it 823

By suzanneallen - 11/09/2009 04:23 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in his car when things got hot and heavy and we decided to climb in the back. After we finished we started to put our clothes back just as a someone's brights flooded into the car. It was a cop, and he had been there the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 126

You deserved it 40 939

By loveade11 - 12/01/2010 19:28 - France

Spicy

Today, a police officer caught my girlfriend and me having sex. The officer was my dad, and we were butt naked in his new Ford Expedition. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 714

You deserved it 35 566

Caught red-handed

By Anonymous - 30/11/2020 20:04

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend and I got busted by the cops having sex in a dark parking lot near the beach. As if that wasn't bad enough, as I was trying to talk my way out of a ticket, one of the cops peeks into the car window and I hear my girlfriend awkwardly giggle and say, "Hi daddy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 748

You deserved it 710

Honest mistake

By Anonymous - 10/10/2020 11:01

Spicy

Today, my girl and I with got caught having sex in the car by cops. They thought we were smoking bongs because the windows were foggy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 870

You deserved it 803

Kinda sus

By kmf - 10/08/2009 19:06 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend and I were starting to get hot and heavy in my truck at our favorite park. We started going at it and we were both butt naked when I saw a car pull into the lot. Not only was it a cop car, but the first thing the cop asked my girlfriend was, "Are you being held against your will?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 138

You deserved it 14 356

Rules and regulations

By backseatbusted - 21/05/2013 16:09 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate in the backseat of his car, when a police car pulled up behind us. My mom later told me that intimacy was fine, just not in a car. We were in the car because she told me that intimacy was fine, just not in her house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 859

You deserved it 13 013

By Whoops - 28/01/2010 20:21 - France

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a make-out session in the backseat of his car, when we heard a voice coming from his pants. Who did he pocket dial? My house. At midnight, when I was supposed to be home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 462

You deserved it 36 461

Caught in 4K

By RBergman - 25/04/2015 20:05 - United States - Basin

Spicy

Today, I had to arrest my own boyfriend for having sex in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 797

You deserved it 3 360

By Anonymous - 15/04/2016 19:46 - United States - Bronx

Spicy

Today, I got locked in my boyfriend's garage in my underwear while his parents ripped him a new one for having sex beneath their roof. His sister had to let me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 540

You deserved it 5 036

Next

Top comments

RickySleeves 20

Friday 8 May 2015 19:13

You had sex in a cop's car?

classicsparkles 17

Friday 8 May 2015 19:17

I don't understand why you would have sex in a car when you have a house that you've made it apparent you're alone in @_@

Comments

XxKosherxx 9

Monday 11 May 2015 3:51

That was stupid OP, really.

jairolover 25

Saturday 13 August 2016 6:23

you're lucky you didn't end up on the sex offender list after being arrested for indecent exposure.

jbuckets_404 38

Tuesday 8 August 2017 21:37

You had sex in the cop's car?! Way to go!

Keywords

Education Parents Public freakouts Mother in law Love Miscellaneous Argument AITA Fear Insects Skincare Health Cats Jealousy Gross Coworkers Work Drugs Animals Dogs Awkward Fire Cars Money Scams Transportation Bikes Scary Neighbours Intimacy

The Top

Today, I found a wallet on the train. I called the owner, who said he would come around and pick it up. When he finally did, he looked inside and screamed that his money was missing, and that I was a dirty thief. I never took a cent. He's filing theft charges against me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 429

You deserved it 4 436

Today, I went to Tiffany's to exchange a bracelet my boyfriend had given me for our year anniversary. It was the first gift that he actually spent money on me for. The sales lady then told me that the bracelet was not a real Tiffany's item. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 797

You deserved it 21 259

The Top

Today, during sex I blurted out, “Oh god yes, put a baby in me!” He lost his boner instantly because he doesn’t want kids. I don’t even know why I said it, I don’t want kids either. In fact I warned him before we started dating that I never want kids, so if he did want kids he should date someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195

You deserved it 591

Today, my mom got angry that I moved stuff in the freezer, and banned me from even opening it in future. I’m in my 30s, I fought in Iraq and Afghanistan, and now I've lost freezer privileges. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 183

You deserved it 207

Today, I helped my parents out by tearing down the old, rusty swing set that's been in our backyard for years. Little did I know that there was a beehive hidden in the long grass, and I now have dozens of painful red bumps all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 172

You deserved it 2 258

Today, at work, a customer asked where the shovels were. I tried to ask him if he was looking for snow shovels or regular shovels. It came out, "Are you looking for show snovels?" He then awkwardly said he was looking for snow shovels. FML

I agree, your life sucks 734

You deserved it 142

Today, while playing basketball, my friend thanked me for passing the ball to him. I was too embarrassed to tell him that that was me shooting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 860

You deserved it 5 044

Today, I swerved to avoid running over a dead cat in the road. Instead, I ran over its head. The crack of its skull was loud enough for me to hear it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 359

You deserved it 8 479