Animals and Birthday: Happy chicken day! - FML

Happy chicken day!

By 3monthsagostillnochkns - 12/09/2021 20:01

Today, after my kids told me they'd saved cash to buy me my dream birthday present - chickens - and after I'd worked excitedly to exhaustion for a week building a coop and chicken yard with no offered help from my husband, I'm now sitting in my empty chicken pen after everyone forgot about my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 366

You deserved it 80

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Same thing different taste

You forgetting something?

By Anonymous - 22/05/2022 20:00 - United States - North Miami Beach

Today, it was my birthday. My family usually gives me a financial gift, but didn't this time and said nothing about it. I cooked my own birthday dinner without help, then washed everyone's dishes. I got my own cake and ate it alone because they were too busy getting drunk. Nobody bothered to sing Happy Birthday either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 127

You deserved it 149

Happy nothing, then

By amy - 30/06/2018 19:00

Today, it's my birthday. I went downstairs expecting birthday greetings from my parents. Instead, they just sat on the couch saying nothing. Thinking they forgot, I casually reminded them. My mom scoffed and said, "Go do the dishes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 622

You deserved it 361

By 00bsg - 21/12/2013 15:46 - United States - Salem

Today, it's my 21st birthday. All my friends and family said they were busy so I figured I was getting a surprise party. Nope. They all were actually busy. I spent my birthday alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 094

You deserved it 4 336

By Meowit - 07/09/2014 03:06 - United States - Livonia

Today, it's my birthday, and everyone, family and friends, forgot. Except my dog who left me a present on my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 648

You deserved it 3 205

By nickorion12 - 28/06/2016 14:21 - United States - Shawnee

Today, it's my birthday. My children decided to make me "breakfast in bed", only to end up setting the kitchen on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 612

You deserved it 1 297

By rene - 22/08/2011 16:46 - United States

Today, it was my birthday, and my kids gave me my car keys I had "lost" a week ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 873

You deserved it 3 366

Sweet Sixteen

By Anonymous - 17/09/2021 13:59 - Netherlands

Today, it's my 16th birthday. My parents forgot about it, and planned a weekend out of town. I was alone on my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 066

You deserved it 94

By Anonymous - 03/03/2011 14:21 - United Kingdom

Today, it's my birthday. My parents, whom I live with, told me that they did not get me anything, but instead they said they would knock off a bit of the housekeeping I owe them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 131

You deserved it 8 324

You sure it was your birthday?

By Anonymous - 04/02/2021 04:53

Today, it was my birthday. My partner of 9 years, and father of my two children, bought me a set of headphones for him to use on the treadmill. Didn’t wrap them, didn’t say happy birthday to me, didn’t tell my kids it was my birthday and worked on the yard all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 140

You deserved it 155

Alexa, play "Unhappy Birthday" by The Smiths

By Anonymous - 24/03/2022 14:00 - Germany

Today, it's my birthday. I spent the day doing nothing but chores, amongst which baking my own birthday cake. I was then so exhausted that I couldn't even stand my own company, so I ate the cake alone on the couch, watching TV. It didn’t taste great. FML

I agree, your life sucks 960

You deserved it 166

Next

Top comments

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 12 September 2021 20:12

You probably counted them before they hatched. "They" say don't do that.

Hangryko 29

Sunday 12 September 2021 20:46

Tell everyone they can live in the coop unless they bring the chickens they promised you.

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 12 September 2021 20:12

You probably counted them before they hatched. "They" say don't do that.

Hangryko 29

Sunday 12 September 2021 20:46

Tell everyone they can live in the coop unless they bring the chickens they promised you.

Chazzster 28

Monday 13 September 2021 0:12

So buy yourself some chickens. Live ones are generally cheap.

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Health Awkward Jewelry Kids Fight Family Love Work Relatable Students Noise Birds Animals Sleep Mental health Medication Contraception Racism Pregnancy Relationship advice Cheating Teenagers Friends Sex Intimacy Embarrassing Revenge Food Boredom

The Top

Today, my dad, who never supported us growing up, and who calls once a month to collect his monthly living expenses, gave me an ultimatum: either buy him a plane ticket so that he can come live with me forever (he's a raging alcoholic) OR to send him $4,500 US Dollars (which where he lives is someone's 6 month salary). FML

I agree, your life sucks 529

You deserved it 105

Today, I was having sexy time with my girlfriend when she said she needed to pee. She came back 5 minutes later and started talking about how she hasn't seen her best friend in ages and misses her. Needless to say, I couldn't get the man downstairs back up when we continued. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 073

You deserved it 183

The Top

Today, my car got stuck in a foot of snow. I tried desperately digging around my wheels to see if it would help. I was finally able to get out 10 minutes later only to realize that I had dropped my phone in the snow while I was digging and had run over it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 872

You deserved it 1 030

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. I thought I'd be spontaneous and spice things up, and gave her a spank across the butt. She started crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 502

You deserved it 1 892

Today, it's memorial day weekend. The cops are all over the place watching for speeders and drunks. Some complete dickhead decided to spray paint "cop killa" on the side of my car. It won't come off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 909

You deserved it 3 244

Today, I was at a club with my friends and my friend got really drunk. Later on he came up to me and said he really needed to pee, but he was too drunk to work the zipper, and asked if I could help. When I finally unzipped him, he was so desperate to go he pissed on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 116

You deserved it 9 964

Today, it was my two-week anniversary of starting my new job, after over a year of unemployment due to Covid. It was great, I was getting on with people, and it actually felt like a career where my skillset was valued and I was appreciated by the management. I showed up to work this morning to find it had burned down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 627

You deserved it 100

Today, my near 70 year-old father posted his Wordle score to the family group chat. Two days after I'd messaged him a warm and lengthy congratulations on his 10-year sobriety anniversary — to which he never replied. FML

I agree, your life sucks 709

You deserved it 185