Health: Fight! Fight! Fight!

Fight! Fight! Fight!

By Anonymous - 02/03/2016 17:54 - United States - Cedar Rapids

Today, some muscle-head showed up at my house and started beating on me. Turned out my son had been posing online as a Navy SEAL, using a picture of me, and had dared this guy to come over and fight him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 651

You deserved it 2 009

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By I fathered a pussy. - 14/06/2013 22:12 - United States - Lakeland

Today, my son visited for the first time in three years, asking to stay a while. It turns out he insulted someone online and gave his address in case they wanted to fight him. They accepted the offer, and so my son's imaginary Muay Thai skills went AWOL, along with his testicles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 991

You deserved it 4 935

By u wot? - 14/02/2015 12:14 - United Kingdom - Ipswich

Today, I found out someone, most likely my psycho ex, has been posing as me on local interest websites, trolling a load of people, and giving them my address so they can come fight me. I found this out when a gentleman showed up at my house wanting to beat me shitless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 458

You deserved it 2 331

Size isn't everything!

By Franklin - 18/12/2017 19:00

Today, I attempted to threaten my daughter's boyfriend to keep him from breaking her heart. I'm a 230-pound former soldier. He's a karate black belt. My family watched me get beat up by a 120-pound teenager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 338

You deserved it 7 912

Kinda deserved it

By Anonymous - 10/12/2021 14:02

Today, my son, who to my great shame is a typical bully, was suspended for bullying a disabled girl. Her father must have been the biggest, meanest, most tattooed ex-marine I've ever seen. He blamed me for bad parenting, and I actually peed myself a little in fear, which he saw too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 389

You deserved it 1 585

By Jim - 19/04/2016 17:25 - United States

Today, my son is having housing issues, so I let him stay at my place for a while. Today, he found out that the quiet, dorky-looking professor who lives next door is an MMA fighter. He tried to break into the guy's house in the middle of the night and is now in the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 376

You deserved it 4 192

By me - 12/03/2012 02:49 - United States

Today, a guy came by my house and demanded my fiancé come out and fight. He explained that my fiancé had been stupid enough to not only troll on a local interest forum, but to leave his name and our address, inviting people to "come shut me up if you think you're tough enough." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 094

You deserved it 3 583

He had it coming

By Anonymous - 19/09/2023 22:00

Today, I found out why my son has been working out and taking martial arts classes. It was so he could beat his stepbrother up and put him in the hospital, as revenge for stealing his secret cash supply, over £4000. I'm too old and too tired for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 570

You deserved it 442

By ihateteenagers - 30/12/2010 02:12 - United States

Today, a punk-looking college kid was making fun of my mentally handicapped son. Out of anger, I punched him in the face. I got handcuffed and thrown into a police car. The kid stood there laughing and pointing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 567

You deserved it 10 070

By fthislyfe - 02/07/2011 14:06 - United States

Today, while arm wrestling with my boyfriend, I had to pretend he beat me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 324

You deserved it 7 936

MMA FML

By ThatEndedWell - 07/01/2019 22:00 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I decided to challenge the jerk jock at work to a fight, since he kept poking fun at me for being a weakling. Having started taking MMA classes, I was confident I'd make him eat his words. Just my luck, he's an MMA instructor and kicked my ass effortlessly. Not what I had planned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 164

You deserved it 4 593

igg125 30

Thursday 3 March 2016 0:13

Stolen valor, I am at a loss for words. Why would anyone lie about military service. And if you do lie about it don't pick a fight with a SEAL.

GhostFox 33

Thursday 3 March 2016 1:20

Punish your son, and press charges against said muscle head. Seriously, press charges. Someone that rage-prone does not need to walk unpunished. Even putting aside that he did it under the assumption you were employed by the USA Military.

Comments

shanson 22

Thursday 3 March 2016 7:15

There are these programs marines do that are basically 24 hours of their boot camp. Sign your kid up for one of those, then tell him that training is the easiest part of what they do. Then take him to meet local vets and hear some of their stories. Hopefully he'll learn why stolen valor is such a big deal

WAKingUP91 11

Thursday 3 March 2016 7:24

Kind of sounds like you and your son have some issues y'all need to work out. It just sounds planned. . . I've been watching too much conspiracy shit.

shinikageWolf 15

Thursday 3 March 2016 7:24

Sounds like your son needs to be grounded for the rest of the millennia.

aliciousness116 16

Thursday 3 March 2016 8:38

Oh damn, that kid is going to be grounded big time, for a long long time lol.

mrsmikelowrey 15

Thursday 3 March 2016 8:52

Press charges against that guy and then your son for accessory to assault and identity theft. Teach him a lesson. Stolen valor is not some little shit thing. I come from a family of Marines and Soldiers. That shit pisses me off. THEN he told that guy to beat you up. No matter what, that's exactly what he did when he posted your picture, said you were a SEAL, and then got into an argument that said "come fight me" in it.

techiejames 8

Thursday 3 March 2016 12:56

Time to press charges against both your son and the Navy SEAL.

ViviMage 38

Thursday 3 March 2016 23:45

There is no Navy SEAL. The kid posed as one online and dared a muscle head to a fight with the person in the photo, the father.

EnJey0 19

Thursday 3 March 2016 13:45

That guy is an idiot, but your son should be punished. Impersonating a member of the military is a crime.

clawstrophobic 15

Thursday 3 March 2016 14:31

Ask the meathead to instead beat up your son, since he was the person that said those things, and grounding him doesn't compare to what he did

bad_boyfriend 10

Thursday 3 March 2016 15:13

You people are dumb. Stolen valor isn't saying you served when you didn't. That has never been prosecuted and never will be. Stolen valor is when you obtain some type of benefit by lying about service. If you don't obtain a benefit, it's not a crime. Google the law you idiots.