Intimacy: Dating is hell

Dating is hell

By CEO - 10/05/2014 02:37 - United States - Bristow

Today, I went on a date for the first time since my divorce was finalized a year ago. The first question the guy asked me was what my favorite sex position is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 664

You deserved it 6 493

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 07/12/2018 20:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, after a year and half of being single, I was asked out on a date. I was asked by a married man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 907

You deserved it 206

The hell that is dating

By Laura - 15/07/2023 15:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, I went on a first date with a guy. He told me his wife had filed for divorce this morning (I had no idea he had ever been married) and then he sent me the e-receipt for my nachos along with his Venmo handle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 832

You deserved it 134

Meanwhile, in 1953…

By nope! - 04/03/2020 12:00

Today, I had my first date in more than two years. As soon as I sat down, the first words out of his mouth were, "How many people have you had sex with? Not just recently, but ever. I don’t date women who’ve had more than 5 partners." I left before we'd even ordered drinks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 188

You deserved it 294

By Username - 16/04/2011 08:39 - United States

Today, I went on my first official date I've been on since my divorce. Things were going great until he ordered his fourth 32oz beer; he got hammered and became a horny octopus. Oh, and he farted whiled trying to give me a goodnight kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 925

You deserved it 4 688

By Anonymous - 26/01/2013 17:20 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I went on another date with a guy I've had a crush on for a long time. Afterwards, we went back to my place for the first time and things got heated. While taking my pants off, he recoiled and asked if I thought it was still No Shave November. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 354

You deserved it 47 319

By hannaholic - 03/07/2009 07:24 - United States

Today, I went on an excellent first date. After the 'end of the date kiss' came, "I suppose this is where I tell you that I'm married." FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 518

You deserved it 4 911

By Anonymous - 10/01/2018 01:30

Today, I went on a first date with a guy. As soon as we sat down at the restaurant, he immediately snatched my menu and said "You're having salad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 065

You deserved it 523

By Anonymous - 26/09/2009 14:24 - United States

Today, I went on my first date in nearly a year. A few minutes into the meal, he called me "scrumptious" and made animal noises for the rest of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 165

You deserved it 3 324

By Anonymous - 12/06/2009 15:05 - United States

Today, I signed up for an online dating service, a couple of days after my divorce. I got my first batch of matches, and number one was a smiling picture of the woman who had just divorced my ass after 20+ years together. Her profile shows she has to have been active there for months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 808

You deserved it 4 368

By confused - 09/04/2011 08:08 - United States

Today, I went on a date for the first time in eight months. He didn't make a move. I then asked if we were on a date. He said, "I don't know, I guess." I can't tell either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 773

You deserved it 5 649

reeses1981 10

Saturday 10 May 2014 12:05

Next!

91hayek 31

Saturday 10 May 2014 12:16

I think you've been out of the game long enough that your douche radar is a bit off. Just re-calibrate and pick better guys, not that bottom of the barrel ass clown.

Comments

CandyPewPewPew 29

Saturday 10 May 2014 13:00

Tell him that you have a dick. And you would like to penetrate him in every holes, even in his nose. Now, you wont have to see him ever again.

ElloSubjects 9

Saturday 10 May 2014 13:16

And then he says "Wow! Let's do this now!' :p

_G0D_ 9

Sunday 11 May 2014 4:10

Yeah! Lets do it #15!

nyes 17

Monday 11 June 2018 23:20

I think OP does have a dick since it shows a male icon

worldclassrager 39

Saturday 10 May 2014 13:20

That's to fast just trying to use you

Enslaved 36

Saturday 10 May 2014 13:39

"Doggy style so we can both watch "X-Files"

graphicstyle7 17

Saturday 10 May 2014 13:45

Just keep dating, keep at it. I got to be single at the ripe old age of 45, and I thought I would not date much. I got on some online dating services and had a lot of fun dating casually (that means DATES, not sex), dating several guys and Not Taking It Too Seriously or looking Too Hard for a replacement mate. I found my husband and we are very happy, but it did take a while. Be patient, go on to the next one and just hang out with different people. You may be a bit different single person now than you were before, get to know what you do and don't like. Good luck.

shujaswati 20

Saturday 10 May 2014 13:51

what kinda cloths were wearing :/

SouthernLady12 13

Saturday 10 May 2014 15:31

Valid point! She could have been dressed very revealing making him think she was that kind of woman.

gracehi 31

Saturday 10 May 2014 16:34

Yes, women communicate their desire to copulate with their clothing, therefore revealing clothing is a perfectly valid reason to assume that she's planning to **** you the moment you meet her. Is that the logic here?

RedPillSucks 31

Saturday 10 May 2014 17:01

1935, apparently

oooohmygosh 8

Saturday 10 May 2014 14:05

He's obviously only interested in one thing, but at least you figured that out on the first date. Good luck, and keep looking!!!

Shandra78 9

Saturday 10 May 2014 14:09

Welcome to the modern dating game! I think guys who actually want a second date before age 40 need a dose of charm school. The level of male cluelessness in my generation baffles my grandmother. Maybe she's seeing the past through 'rose coloured glasses' but she says guys were a bit more aware of what not to say on a first date. And yeah, most people actually did date and have sex before marriage back then. Condoms already existed even if hormonal birth control hadn't been invented yet.