_Patrick____Star

Mr Bikini Bottom 34 years-old

paradox 7 February 2009, 07:23 United States 🌶️ Spicy

Today, I realized my best friend has had it off in my apartment more times than I have. FML

21 comments

void bowels() { cry(); } 26 November 2014, 20:45 Caerphilly, United Kingdom

Spooked

Today, I came home late from work. As I got out of my car, I noticed a child-shaped silhouette in my bedroom window. I almost shat myself, since I live alone. I searched the whole house, sobbing in fear, only to find no trace of whatever or whoever I'd seen. FML

167 comments