rickyricky528

Pesky kids

Today, my house caught on fire. The firefighters said that it was caused by a lit cigarette on the carpet. I don't smoke, but apparently my 13 year-old son does. FML

Don't let them get you down

Today, I went to McDonald's and ordered a Happy Meal with a girl's toy. The high school girls behind the counter said I was too old to be served one, and I had to go home and explain to my sick daughter why she didn't get her toy. FML

Today, I woke up super glued to the toilet. FML

Today, my boyfriend decided that he didn't need a real job. He wants to sell pot for a living. Or hang drywall. He can't decide. FML