joeymont

Today, I shat out a staple. FML

Today, I dreamed that I was making out with a cute girl. Just as I was about to take it to the next level, she suddenly burst into tears and said, "I'm sorry, I can't do this." I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML

Today, I dislocated my collarbone while trying remove my bra without taking off my shirt. FML