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No touching!

Noname - 27/01/2009 19:36 - United States

Today, at the mall my brother and I went to look at a vendor's items when my mom said not to touch anything. Thinking my brother was standing next to me, I saw him touching stuff so I smacked him in the arm and told him to stop. I turn to see that the old lady to my side was giving me a mean look. FML

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Peckish

Bontempi - 19/07/2012 18:55 - France

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

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Anonymous - 12/04/2012 18:31 - United States - Rock Island

Today, I was at a party, when the cops busted us. Since I'm underage, I hid behind a chair for an hour and a half while they breathalyzed everyone and sat them in the same room I was in. The cops left, everyone realized I was behind the chair, and now my nickname is "Anne Frank". FML

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aliezzedine - 02/02/2012 11:32 - Lebanon

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

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aliezzedine

aliezzedine 10

Thursday 22 March 2012 1:12

Okay people I've sat around watching the comments ensue for a long ass time, and it's now my turn to clarify some shit: 1-My mom is not dumb, she has an average intelligence. 2-She has not handled any piece of the modern technology we all know so well in her life except the phone maybe. 3-She is actually blonde lol! 4-For those who said I made your day, it's a pleasure mates! 5-Those who are being disrespectful to my mother, who is actually the sweetest thing ever, go get a life people it was an honest mistake. It was stupid misconception I gotta admit! But trust me, she got plenty of brains to go around the table. 4-Some people are giving some really hilarious suggestions, you my friends are awesome! Cheers (Yes I'm the author of the post for all of you with the low IQs)

Anonymous - 06/10/2011 20:35 - United States

Today, my new coworker asked if I knew her daughter. I responded yes and asked how her pregnancy was going. She didn't know her daughter was pregnant. FML

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