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The all-time greatest FMLs

True love will find you in the end

By Anonymous - 31/03/2024 06:00 - Pakistan

Today, I'm going through the first/worst heartbreak of my life, all while studying for med school finals. Every time I try to focus on studying, I see a flashback of his smile and I melt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 461

You deserved it 174

Bad start

By poopface82 - 02/01/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, after my girlfriend’s grandmother died over the holidays, both my kids are sick, my beloved aunt is on death’s doorstep and, to top it off, my car’s brakes are shot. I don’t know if I will ever not be stressed the hell out again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 102

Alexa, play "****** Addict" by Buzzcoks

By Anonymous - 24/06/2023 10:00 - United States - Monroe

Today, I stopped using porn by blocking it on my phone and laptop. Only problem is I still get off without it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 436

Drunk Friends

By FML Approved - 28/10/2017 04:00 - United States - New York

That little guy definitely needs some help!

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 123

It's a deal

By Anonymous - 08/08/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, my husband bought his fifth car in two years. He doesn't wreck them, but he keeps buying old junk cars "for a bargain" that are one bad day away from being scrapped. The last one lasted two months before the frame broke in half from rust. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 84

Bygone days

By No fun for me then - 08/04/2025 20:00 - United Kingdom - Cardiff

Today, my wife was telling me about some kinky things she did with a previous boyfriend. Since my sexual adventures were fairly limited compared to hers, I commented that I would like to try that sometime. She said, "Why would we have kinky sex? We're already married." She was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 99

Be unprepared

By Anonymous - 01/05/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, we were supposed to go on a weekend camping trip with our Scout troop. On Thursday I wasn't feeling well but I made it through school okay. Dad forced me to pack up immediately after school, even though I felt worse. I threw up on the porch on the way out. Dad thinks I did this on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 80

Locked

By Anonymous - 19/05/2024 06:00 - United States - Austin

Today, I was in a rush and didn't notice that the bathroom stall I chose at work had a broken lock. Halfway through my business, a coworker barged in. We locked eyes for an awkward eternity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 89

Antiques roadshow

By Anonymous - 21/04/2026 12:00 - United Kingdom

Today, we needed to get an antique dresser downstairs for sale. While I was fetching a cart to wheel it down safely, my wife and boys decided to impress me by carrying it. The plaster on the walls now needs repair, as does the banister and glass front door. Plus the dresser is now unsellable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 61

Home sweet home

By Anonymous - 07/06/2025 09:00 - United States

Today, my wife yelled at me for putting away her rain coat and two sweaters that were hanging on the back of chairs. Because, “I was about to do that!” My mistake. They had only been there for a week. Ah, marital bliss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 89

Kid A

By Anonymous - 25/09/2025 09:00

Today, me and my husband are having our first big marital argument. Our baby still doesn’t have a name, all because I want to call her a normal name and he wants to call her some obscure name from an anime he really likes. I’ve never seen him this stubborn about anything this stupid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 160

Pretentious menus suck

By Anonymous - 20/02/2023 02:00

Today, I went to a fancy restaurant and couldn't pronounce any of the menu items. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 570

Not a bio major

By Podcast bros must be stopped! - 31/01/2026 03:00

Today, I had a client argue that he shouldn’t have to pay the full amount of court ordered child support because the kids aren’t “fully his”. He swears that when a woman has multiple partners, trace amounts of DNA are left in the womb, creating kids with several fathers. Yes he was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 72

Anhedonia

By dead inside - 16/09/2024 20:00 - United States

Today, my depression has reached the point where I don't even have the energy to seriously pursue any hobbies. Any time I find the motivation to try something new, I immediately get discouraged at the slightest difficulties, and become even more depressed. I don't even know why I'm trying anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 135

Hush!

By Anonymous - 04/03/2025 00:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I received a letter signed “anonymously” by at least 6 of my neighbours that unless I do something about my loud nightmares they’re going to start calling the police every time it happens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 147

So frustrating!

By Anonymous - 29/11/2023 18:00

Today, I bought a massive new puzzle to take my mind off of things. Hours later, I realized there was a missing piece. Frustrated, I looked everywhere for it, only to discover it was stuck to the bottom of my shoe, and I'd been walking around with it all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 147

It's all too much

By Anonymous - 21/07/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, my car crapped out in the middle of the road, after over a year of only being able to find short contract jobs, all while juggling the grief of the back to back deaths of my mother and grandfather. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 83

No comment

By Framed guy - 01/08/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I said to a coworker, “Epstein didn’t kill himself” in our office, as a joke response to something he'd said. Later, someone from HR pulled me aside and said, “We don’t comment on ongoing investigations.” I work at a dog food company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 135

Waiting list blues

By Anonymous - 21/06/2024 16:00

Today, after two years of fighting, I finally got an appointment for my son to see an autism specialist. The appointment is in December 2026. He’ll be 11 and in high school by then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 105

Confuddled

By Anonymous - 25/11/2025 20:00

Today, I trusted my husband to take the kids to the park by himself 600 yards from the house so I could get some housework done. He managed to lose one bicycle, three wellies, a glove, and his wallet. I sent him back. It’s been two hours and he’s only found his emptied wallet and one welly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 90

Passive agressive on a whole new level

By Joe Bloggs - 30/09/2024 14:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was at my usual coffee shop when I overheard a couple at the next table arguing about how to break up. They decided to have a “Breakup Party” and invited everyone around them, including me, right there and then. I ended up eating free cake while watching their weird, messy breakup unfold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 136

Subway Surfer on a Mission

By FML Approved - 26/09/2017 03:00

You know he's got something important going on...

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 114

Another one bites the dust

By Anonymous - 29/10/2023 04:00

Today, every guy I've dated in the last 5 years loses interest after we've had sex, no matter how long I wait. The worst part is none of them will tell me what's wrong with me, they all just act like everything is fine, whilst "phasing it out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 192

The road to hell…

By Chris - 21/07/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I wanted to donate blood for the first time ever at the The 38th Annual Rock and Roll Up Your Sleeve Blood Drive. Unfortunately, someone with my exact name & birthdate was already in the system and 30 minutes were spent trying to correct the problem. Eventually, I got frustrated and left. No good deed goes unpunished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 129

Babe 3: Pig on the phone

By Anonymous - 27/01/2022 23:00 - United States - Stephenville

Today, I accidentally called my Dad “Babe” on the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 750

Hobbit feet

By Anonymous - 12/05/2025 00:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad has such thick, horn like toenails that when I stepped on one of the cuttings, it actually stabbed into the thinner skin on the underside of my toe and bled like crazy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 73

By Pooperscooper - 20/07/2009 18:45 - France

Today, I learned when you're babysitting a 5 year old, and you hear the toilet flush and then the words "uh oh", it's already too late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 41

Wrong way down a one way strrreeeeet

By WrongTrainGuy - 27/05/2021 20:01 - United Kingdom

Today, I took the wrong train and didn’t realise it until it arrived in Aberdeen. Eight hours from where I was meant to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 974

Panic!

By Only an orange cat... - 22/02/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, I found out two things about my new cat: One, he is afraid of thunder. Two, his reaction to hearing a loud thunderclap is to jump very high in the air with his claws extended, then run like hell. I discovered this when he jumped and landed right on my face. My face now looks like I smashed it into a window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 122

Just ask

By Messy love life - 19/02/2021 08:01 - India

Today, I casually hooked up with a guy with no strings attached. Later, we had a great conversation and I suddenly realized that I have feelings for him. He wants nothing even close to a relationship and probably doesn't like me back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 1 451

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The Top

Today, I told my parents that I was going on a diet to lose weight and I wanted their support. They brought home donuts and pizza for dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 788

You deserved it 1 246

Today, I was convinced to face my fears of rollercoasters by a friend. I'm writing this at the highest point of the ride after being stuck over thirty minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 588

You deserved it 2 260

Today, my 8 year-old adopted daughter told me she wants me to take her back so another family can adopt her because I don't give her enough toys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 934

You deserved it 4 639

Today, I was celebrating my birthday when my friend gave me chocolate as a gift. I wasn't suspecting anything and ate about half of it before I noticed something strange. It turned out there were some kind of worms living in it and the chocolate was about a year after the expiration date. I got sick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 077

You deserved it 278

Today, I let out the most vile, nose-melting dairy curdling fart of my life. The sound didn’t wake me up. But the nightmare I had from how rank smelling it was sure did. My own fart ruined my sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 553

You deserved it 425

Today, my husband told me that I’m no longer “allowed” to see my best friend of 27 years. He’s worked up in his mind that she’s going to try to convince me to cheat on him because she’s single. She literally introduced us and was the maid of honor at our wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 739

You deserved it 108