The Top · The all-time greatest FMLs

Cough Cough · 7 June 2025, 03:00 ·Steele, United States

Thanks, Canada!

Today, just like every other day, I live in the Midwest. If you're not living in the Midwest, and you're wondering how we're doing with the Canadian wildfire smoke, I'm here to tell you that we're quite miserable. Especially if you're me, a person who already has very janky lungs. I'm afraid to leave the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 381 You deserved it 110

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Anonymous · 18 June 2025, 12:00 ·United States

She's lost control

Today, I found out that my husband proposed to his girlfriend, and that her mom had posted it on Facebook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 626 You deserved it 93

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Barney · 22 June 2025, 22:00 ·Thunder Bay, Canada

The Voice

Today, I was alone in the kitchen doing the dishes, and I started singing along to my favorite song when it came on my playlist. However, unbeknownst to me, my neighbors were having a barbecue next door, and they cheered and applauded when I'd finished. I’m never singing again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 321 You deserved it 186

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MissT · 21 June 2021, 03:59 ·Dianella, Australia

Love hurts

Today, my divorce certificate arrived in the mail. Reading it felt like I was punched in the face by a brick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 954 You deserved it 178

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Anonymous · 31 August 2022, 18:00 ·Australia

Itchy and scratchy

Today, I went to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. While I was there, I started to get really itchy. Turns out they have 5 cats. Guess what I'm allergic to? FML

I agree, your life sucks 989 You deserved it 122

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Anonymous · 31 December 2023, 00:00 ·Eau Claire, United States

Roll on 2024

Today, just after Christmas, my husband and father of my small children went and left us and I don’t know how to deal with any of it. I don’t know how to be a single mom or fix it. I want to wake up from this nightmare. I’m heartbroken, not just for myself but for my kids as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 893 You deserved it 167

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Anonymous · 1 July 2021, 16:01

Headphones are a health hazard

Today, only some excellent security footage stopped me being arrested after I bumped into a young girl while looking at my phone and her mother, an Uber Karen, accused me of sexual assault and an off-duty woman police officer tackled me to the ground before I'd even took off my headphones. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 313 You deserved it 137

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Shoot me now · 15 September 2022, 14:00 ·Falls Church, United States

Work faster

Today, my boss accused me of eyeing for a promotion when I suggested a solution to save our team time by staying on a 2-hour schedule in the mornings. He told me we average 3 hours for our production, but his goal for this area is 90 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 845 You deserved it 115

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Singleagain · 10 January 2024, 20:00 ·United States 🌶️ Spicy

Classic

Today, when I came home, my girlfriend was in sexy lingerie, and said it was a surprise for me. Sounds awesome, right? Too bad she was drenched in sweat and the room smelled like sex. I looked in the closet, only to get punched in the face by a naked guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 003 You deserved it 144

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Not Marilyn · 12 July 2025, 03:00 ·Dallas, United States

Windy

Today, I was walking into work when a gust of wind blew my skirt completely over my head in front of a group of tourists taking pictures of the building. Now I'm afraid that somewhere out there is a photo of me flashing my polka-dot underwear like a knock-off Marilyn Monroe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 400 You deserved it 107

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unluckypanda · 4 July 2021, 04:04 ·Makawao, United States

Timing is everything

Today, I had a photoshoot planned weeks ago, getting one of the last coveted spots. My boyfriend couldn’t even show up on time. It was a sunrise shoot. We arrived once the sun had been up for 25 mins already. He wondered "what the big deal is?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 947 You deserved it 220

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Summer · 14 July 2025, 09:00 ·United States

Suspicious minds

Today, I came back home from an errand and found my ex in bed, embracing my 20 year-old daughter. They said that nothing has been going on. Glad he's an ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 560 You deserved it 96

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No way · 16 July 2025, 00:00 ·Bradford, United Kingdom

Snoopy

Today, I liked one of my crush’s Instagram post from 2012 while stalking his profile. Despite me realising my mistake and un-liking the post, he immediately followed me back, and sent me a DM saying, “Wow, that’s some deep digging.” I’m now referred to as his "creepy stalker archaeologist of Instagram." FML

I agree, your life sucks 115 You deserved it 568

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Anonymous · 6 July 2021, 16:01 ·Norwich, United Kingdom

Public Freakout

Today, my partner was driving. We were coming up to a sharp bend up a hill when suddenly a girl and a boy came speeding down the hill on a scooter. My partner stopped well before, but they fell off the kerb. We got out to check they were OK. The girl blamed us and kicked me in the balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 010 You deserved it 105

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Anonymous · 18 January 2024, 06:00 ·Germany

AMAZON!

Today, I went to the pickup location where the email from Amazon said my package was, but they didn't have it. Through order tracking, I then found out that it has been delivered to the wrong location, on the other side of town. This has happened twice in a row now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 514 You deserved it 96

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Anonymous · 21 January 2024, 00:00 ·United Kingdom

Riled up

Today, my wife blamed me for the washing machine breaking. When I told her it wasn’t me because I haven’t used it this week, she immediately changed direction and started blaming me for not doing enough around the house, which is utter bullshit. I know I do my share, I think she just wanted to fight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 639 You deserved it 152

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Anonymous · 23 January 2024, 20:00 ·United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy

Impressive dating technique

Today, I took a girl on a date. This girl is tiny, about 4 ft 10 and petite. She ordered a 16 inch pizza, garlic bread, wings, fries, and multiple drinks, and damn if she didn’t eat every bite of it, it was impressive. Until we were screwing later and she vomited the whole meal down my chest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 733 You deserved it 229

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Anonymous · 13 July 2021, 08:01

Home delivery

Today, I received two letters: an eviction notice and a Dear John. Neither went through the mail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 840 You deserved it 94

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Anonymous · 23 January 2024, 06:00 ·Saskatoon, Canada

Three piece suite

Today, I found out my father sleeps in the nude, when I rushed into my parents room at night to inform them there was a bat in the house. I’m traumatized. FML

I agree, your life sucks 198 You deserved it 657

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Anonymous · 27 January 2024, 22:00 ·United Kingdom

Preferential treatment

Today, after I bought my house, my dad forced me to do all the DIY with him because I needed to know how to do it myself, but my sister just bought her house and not only did dad hire tradesmen to do a lot of the work, he forced me to do a lot of it as well. Never before have I wished I was a girl too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 548 You deserved it 246

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Anonymous · 26 September 2022, 14:30

Infrastructurally deprived

Today, I learned the “almost complete” transit that would cut my commute in half is delayed at least another year. When I chose my high school, they said it would be complete by the year’s end. I’m a senior now and it definitely won’t be done before my graduation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 006 You deserved it 167

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Anonymous · 19 July 2021, 16:03

Too on the nose

Today, my boyfriend was trying to describe his feelings. I asked him if he felt any emotions other than "anger." He went to get a beer and never came back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 971 You deserved it 396

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Anonymous · 11 February 2024, 22:00 ·United Kingdom

Unlucky 180

Today, I’m in hospital because a pub dart fell from the sky, seemingly from nowhere, and stuck itself in the top of my skull. I was walking my dog, I wasn’t near any trees or any high buildings it could have fallen from. If someone threw it from where I couldn’t see them, it was a very lucky shot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 614 You deserved it 91

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Aaaauuuugh? · 20 October 2022, 04:00 ·United States

DO IT! DO THE THING!

Today, I accidentally discovered thanks to my friends that I can do Tim Allen's "Home Improvement" grunt almost perfectly. Now every time my friends see me, they ask me to do it. One of them just showed me the Sonic Mania video where every sound is replaced by the grunt. This is going to get old extremely fast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 672 You deserved it 175

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Anonymous · 23 August 2025, 22:00 ·Akron, United States

HR sucks

Today, HR informed me that they would not be investigating my formal complaint against my boss. This after four months of relentless bullying, including calling me while I was on vacation to tell me to do work, and eliminating my position when she found out I had gone to HR. FML

I agree, your life sucks 511 You deserved it 78

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mermyth · 28 October 2022, 10:00 ·United States

Insane parents

Today, my mom came to my room to tell me that there were guests coming over. Five minutes later, she came to my room to scream at me for not doing the dishes, “like she just told me.” When? FML

I agree, your life sucks 859 You deserved it 139

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Smarty Cat · 29 October 2022, 18:00 ·Steele, United States

Caturday treat!

Today, I watched as my friend played dead to see how her cat would react. She got upset when he just sniffed her hand and walked away. I tried to explain to her that he was smart enough to figure out she was faking it, but I got called a "know-it-all." Jeez, sorry that cats are more intelligent than you thought. FML

I agree, your life sucks 783 You deserved it 157

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eiregal2 · 15 April 2020, 23:00 ·Cork, Ireland

Butterfingers

Today, I somehow managed to slice open my thumb. The dangerous weapon that caused this to happen? Velcro. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 434 You deserved it 201

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Anonymous · 4 November 2022, 04:00 ·Perth, Australia

Timewaster

Today, I spent the afternoon transplanting a whole bunch of corn seedlings that sprouted, even turning over the new soil with compost and fertiliser. While watering them in, I realised they're actually all just weeds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 406 You deserved it 658

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Anonymous · 8 November 2022, 10:00

Sensitive

Today, my teeth are very sensitive and hold a grudge, so since getting a cavity fixed a month ago, I’ve had a good side and a bad side to chew on (or rather: not chew on). Unfortunately, I had to see the dentist again for another cavity, and now what used to be my bad side is now my good side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 733 You deserved it 123

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